Dear all, my lovely mum passed away on June 11th. I (as an only child and with father having passed away 3 years ago) had to make some horrendous decisions but I think they were for the best.
I was in Mali, West Africa (where I now live) and she was in her fabulous care home in the northwest. They phoned me and said she was very ill and I had to come back. I managed to do Bamako-Paris- Manchester (not a route well travelled I imagine ! ) and go there by 10.00am the next morning. She was extremely weak from dysphagia (inability to swallow) which has been going on for several months) and , to cut a long story short, had pneumonia. With the GP we decided that it was best not to intervene - she was skeletal, weak, semi-conscious and could not swallow even liquid medicines. It was an horrendous decision but I was well supported by the GP, the carers and especially by the Methodist Home's Chaplain who sat up every night with me for 4 nights. Mum finally passed away in a haze of morphine delivered by the district nurses so she was at least comfortable..I talked and talked to her and told her to think about nice things such as sunsets over a fishing village where we used to see in France. To be honest I felt relief once she had passed as this long and terrible journey was over. I know she is at peace and I feel I have regained my own stability a little. The cremation was last Wednesday - it was a lovely celebration of the life someone who only knew how to give. I asked for the donations at mum's funeral to go the the AS and to be earmarked for research so we can stop this horrible disease in its tracks.
I can't thank you enough for all your help and support over the years - I see old names disappear as their relatives pass away and new names appear - I guess that is part of 'life's rich tapestry' as they say . I will pop in occasionally to see what you all are up to but I can't tell you what this group has meant to me even if didn't contribute much.
Anyway, I am back in Africa now and have been warmly welcomed and looked after by many people who do not have such taboos regarding death as we do - it helps alot believe me !
With love to you all, Sarah C
I was in Mali, West Africa (where I now live) and she was in her fabulous care home in the northwest. They phoned me and said she was very ill and I had to come back. I managed to do Bamako-Paris- Manchester (not a route well travelled I imagine ! ) and go there by 10.00am the next morning. She was extremely weak from dysphagia (inability to swallow) which has been going on for several months) and , to cut a long story short, had pneumonia. With the GP we decided that it was best not to intervene - she was skeletal, weak, semi-conscious and could not swallow even liquid medicines. It was an horrendous decision but I was well supported by the GP, the carers and especially by the Methodist Home's Chaplain who sat up every night with me for 4 nights. Mum finally passed away in a haze of morphine delivered by the district nurses so she was at least comfortable..I talked and talked to her and told her to think about nice things such as sunsets over a fishing village where we used to see in France. To be honest I felt relief once she had passed as this long and terrible journey was over. I know she is at peace and I feel I have regained my own stability a little. The cremation was last Wednesday - it was a lovely celebration of the life someone who only knew how to give. I asked for the donations at mum's funeral to go the the AS and to be earmarked for research so we can stop this horrible disease in its tracks.
I can't thank you enough for all your help and support over the years - I see old names disappear as their relatives pass away and new names appear - I guess that is part of 'life's rich tapestry' as they say . I will pop in occasionally to see what you all are up to but I can't tell you what this group has meant to me even if didn't contribute much.
Anyway, I am back in Africa now and have been warmly welcomed and looked after by many people who do not have such taboos regarding death as we do - it helps alot believe me !
With love to you all, Sarah C
