It's been a while since I posted. Mum is in a residential home of my brothers choice to make it easier for him to visit - he hasn't been now for 3 weeks, says he's been ill - believe he has to a certain extent.
I am finding it more and more difficult to visit her, every time I walk in the room I am "jumped" on, told off for whatever is on her mind at the moment. The one thing is that I don't visit enough - I go 2 to 3 times a week. As it is not near where I live - I know it is only 6 miles away - and I work full time to visit for an hour, I can't stay any less or I feel bad, puts 2 hours on my journey home.
My brother did not help with emptying the house where my mother lived, I owned the house you see, but he could not see past this and felt that the house was my responsibility, could not see that the contents were also his responsibility, as was the person who lived in it.
The hurtful thing, silly I know, is that in June it was my birthday, and there I was buying her cards and presents for other members of the family, ie. my son, my brothers wife, my auntie, but could not do the same for myself, did not feel right, and my ever thoughtful brother could not do the same!
When it is his sons birthday and his birthday and Christmas, I shall do the same, as mum always liked to send cards and presents.
Sorry about this moan, but am feeling a little fragile at the moment, find it hard to visit and feel I must and come away upset always, know that mum doesn't mean what she says, but it is still hard.
Thanks for listening. Chants
I am finding it more and more difficult to visit her, every time I walk in the room I am "jumped" on, told off for whatever is on her mind at the moment. The one thing is that I don't visit enough - I go 2 to 3 times a week. As it is not near where I live - I know it is only 6 miles away - and I work full time to visit for an hour, I can't stay any less or I feel bad, puts 2 hours on my journey home.
My brother did not help with emptying the house where my mother lived, I owned the house you see, but he could not see past this and felt that the house was my responsibility, could not see that the contents were also his responsibility, as was the person who lived in it.
The hurtful thing, silly I know, is that in June it was my birthday, and there I was buying her cards and presents for other members of the family, ie. my son, my brothers wife, my auntie, but could not do the same for myself, did not feel right, and my ever thoughtful brother could not do the same!
When it is his sons birthday and his birthday and Christmas, I shall do the same, as mum always liked to send cards and presents.
Sorry about this moan, but am feeling a little fragile at the moment, find it hard to visit and feel I must and come away upset always, know that mum doesn't mean what she says, but it is still hard.
Thanks for listening. Chants