Celia, my love, please please don't think your posts haven't sustained and comforted me throughout this whole week - they have been life savers. Literally 
Poor Piedsmum is poorly again.
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Pied I didn't know that, I am so sorry - I haven't really "known" you for very long and so didn't know much of the background. I apologise that some of my post must have seemed so crass when you no doubt have a very good understanding re pressure sores
However, I have to say that your comment does make me really understand why they are saying they should do the pressure area care/ dressing change etc.
Sorry
Celia
However, I have to say that your comment does make me really understand why they are saying they should do the pressure area care/ dressing change etc.
Sorry
Celia
Am cross
Hello Pied , Have just read your Post about your Mum 's Bed Sore am cross & with the C H for bad care & not servicing the Equipment correctly Sorry I know this is not going to help your Mum ( & you ) but had the need to post my view on the matter ( guess its cos of working in a N H that made me want to post this) Sorry if caused offence Pied
Much Love , Peace & Comfort
Love & Healing Hugs Love Grove x x x
Hello Pied , Have just read your Post about your Mum 's Bed Sore am cross &
with the C H for bad care & not servicing the Equipment correctly Sorry I know this is not going to help your Mum ( & you ) but had the need to post my view on the matter ( guess its cos of working in a N H that made me want to post this) Sorry if caused offence Pied Much Love , Peace & Comfort
Love & Healing Hugs Love Grove x x x
It doesn't matter what is going on outside. Just like giving birth .... it happens.
I must confess the three times when I thought I was going to die I dont think the external made a lot of difference
Twice I was on a ward with all the usual banging and clattering and once at home with my parents
A nice smell is nice tough for Lucy I took lily of the valley and for my mum i picked some pinks out of the garden
This is an odd comment from me but I hope it may help you to feel better (and less responsible too for trying to organise perfection for your Mum ...). If it doesn't please ignore it, because it'll be either a helpful comment or one so completely crass it'll be unbearable.
Years ago I found myself thinking quite suddenly about my pet cat who'd been operated on the day before quite successfully but was miserable "If I don't do something, I'll find her dead on the floor by 12.00pm tomorrow". It wasn't the kind of thought I'd ever expect myself to have; the time - 12.00pm tomorrow - was quite specific and unrelated to her health problems. What I took from that strange experience was that dying has its own rules and we have less impact on them than we might expect or fear.
Holding you and yours in the Light ...
Years ago I found myself thinking quite suddenly about my pet cat who'd been operated on the day before quite successfully but was miserable "If I don't do something, I'll find her dead on the floor by 12.00pm tomorrow". It wasn't the kind of thought I'd ever expect myself to have; the time - 12.00pm tomorrow - was quite specific and unrelated to her health problems. What I took from that strange experience was that dying has its own rules and we have less impact on them than we might expect or fear.
Holding you and yours in the Light ...
I always loved falling asleep on the sofa to the sound of mum & dad chatting. I had that nagging little worry in my head that they would spot me there, and disturb my bliss by moving me to bed. Not unlike what you want your your mum. The voices of the people she loves, chatting in the room as she drifts off towards the deepest kind of sleep, and removal of that worry that she might be shifted any minute.
Doesn't even sound too much to ask, does it? The staff are doing their job, but your protective nature is heightened now, more than ever, and your gut feeling is speaking up too, just screaming to leave her be. And I can't help but agree...some things are possibly necessary, but I'm sure some can wait...or even be left completely.
But, you can only do what's in your power, and I know many things were beyond my control too, but these are not what you remember, I promise, my love. I'm just joining you for a little moan about the problems in life...which are evidently linked to the problems in death.
Sometimes, you just need to let some things go and act with your best judgement. Most of all, remind yourself gently, that you've had no experience of this, so how could you possibly know what to do for the best. A lot of it is trial and error.
I'm sure your new arrangement will help you cope more now. The exhaustion from the past few days will have messed with your mind and your emotions, so take sanctuary in the heart of your family home, an know that they will call if there is any change. Treat your landline and mobile like they're super-glued to you and allow yourself to sleep deeply. You will wake if the phone rings. No need to keep checking...watched pot, and all that!
And if she slips away before you make it, you'll know she was ready. You must try to prepare yourself for that, even if it's not what you'd hope for, because the pressure to be by her side is another pressure you don't need. It would only spoil times you do have together, and they are so very precious.
Let the background noises be what they are. They will sound familiar to your mum, and she may just feel that warmth of drifting off on the sofa...Just like when I was a little girl, xxx
Doesn't even sound too much to ask, does it? The staff are doing their job, but your protective nature is heightened now, more than ever, and your gut feeling is speaking up too, just screaming to leave her be. And I can't help but agree...some things are possibly necessary, but I'm sure some can wait...or even be left completely.
But, you can only do what's in your power, and I know many things were beyond my control too, but these are not what you remember, I promise, my love. I'm just joining you for a little moan about the problems in life...which are evidently linked to the problems in death.
Sometimes, you just need to let some things go and act with your best judgement. Most of all, remind yourself gently, that you've had no experience of this, so how could you possibly know what to do for the best. A lot of it is trial and error.
I'm sure your new arrangement will help you cope more now. The exhaustion from the past few days will have messed with your mind and your emotions, so take sanctuary in the heart of your family home, an know that they will call if there is any change. Treat your landline and mobile like they're super-glued to you and allow yourself to sleep deeply. You will wake if the phone rings. No need to keep checking...watched pot, and all that!
And if she slips away before you make it, you'll know she was ready. You must try to prepare yourself for that, even if it's not what you'd hope for, because the pressure to be by her side is another pressure you don't need. It would only spoil times you do have together, and they are so very precious.
Let the background noises be what they are. They will sound familiar to your mum, and she may just feel that warmth of drifting off on the sofa...Just like when I was a little girl, xxx
Dear Celia, please please don't apologise!! You weren't to know!!!! It's fine - not crass. Your posts are wonderfully comforting. Please keep saying whatever. Nothing offends me x
Thank you for all these helpful posts. Yes I see I have been irrational - lack of sleep does weird things to your mind. I really am in a weird, surreal place where I can't think straight. I long to go back to work.
Alsoconfused I think your cat story makes sense but being tired I'm not sure I have the right end of the stick.
Alsoconfused I think your cat story makes sense but being tired I'm not sure I have the right end of the stick.
Off to bed with you Pied, tomorrow is another day.... try and get some sleep and switch off for a while if you can, love to you xxxx
Night , Night Dearest Pied & pleased you are sleeping in YOUR OWN Bed tonight Special Vibes & Healing Thoughts you can rest / sleep well Pied
Much Love & Hugs
Love Grove x x
Much Love & Hugs
Love Grove x x
Ah thanks Grove, Dazmum, Celia and everyone. Celia, that is exactly what my sister just texted me!
Dear Pied
I am glad you will be sleeping in your own bed tonight, and do hope you get some restful sleep.
This is an awsome thread, humbling to be with you in spirit at this special time. There is nothing I can add that has not already been said, and so many posts have said so much that is meaningful and poignant.
Sending you much love, strength and comfort.
Loo xxx
I am glad you will be sleeping in your own bed tonight, and do hope you get some restful sleep.
This is an awsome thread, humbling to be with you in spirit at this special time. There is nothing I can add that has not already been said, and so many posts have said so much that is meaningful and poignant.
Sending you much love, strength and comfort.
Loo xxx
Dear Pied
Hope you’re continuing to feel all the strength and support out there for you and get some real quality rest tonight. Your intuition is guiding you safely. What immense fortitude your mum has, if you’ve inherited any of that too am sure you’ll be able to surmount whatever lies ahead.
All warm wishes for a peaceful night for both mum and you.
Px
Hope you’re continuing to feel all the strength and support out there for you and get some real quality rest tonight. Your intuition is guiding you safely. What immense fortitude your mum has, if you’ve inherited any of that too am sure you’ll be able to surmount whatever lies ahead.
All warm wishes for a peaceful night for both mum and you.
Px
Hello Pied,
I have only just signed up to TP but have been reading your thread. It is awesome the love and support from everyone as you spend your last few days with your lovely Mum. Your Mum must be very proud of you and your sister, the love strength and courage you both have with what you have done and are doing for her and sharing your thoughts with all of us.
I just want to add my love and say I am thinking of you too.
Big hug
Sajimjo
I have only just signed up to TP but have been reading your thread. It is awesome the love and support from everyone as you spend your last few days with your lovely Mum. Your Mum must be very proud of you and your sister, the love strength and courage you both have with what you have done and are doing for her and sharing your thoughts with all of us.
I just want to add my love and say I am thinking of you too.
Big hug
Sajimjo
Hi Pied
I haven't been able to 'get on' to TP for the last 3 1/2 hours.Here now and as normal sending love to you all.
I hope you managed to get some sleep in your own bed.
Take care
Lyn T
I haven't been able to 'get on' to TP for the last 3 1/2 hours.Here now and as normal sending love to you all.
I hope you managed to get some sleep in your own bed.
Take care
Lyn T
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