Oh dear, I know its late and I know I'm tired but I dont know how much longer I can carry on looking after John. And he's not even that advanced in terms of his AD.
He is still only 64 he is phsically fit, fully mobile, fully active though lacks the motivation or mental ability to do virtually anything except try and pick an argument with me. He is completely confused, distressed and has almost no short term memory but never shuts up. He has refused all along to go to any kind of daycare, and sticks to me like glue, questioning or disputing everything I try to say OR do.
Because of this I have moved us up north where all my family live to get the support of my son and sisters. We've only been here 2 weeks and I know thats too soon for that support to start helping how I FEEL.
Our son has done loads to help us so far but he's got his own probs. too much work, pregnant wife with a very sick pregnancy, busy on their new home. He's taken his dad out to give me a break but so far John won't spend time on his own or with my sisters etc.. Hopefully that will change as he gets more settled here. My sister has reminded me that the move alone will have have completely discombobulated him, and that its very early days.
I know all of that but I just feel I need to get away from him for a break or to get him to agree to regular day care. I know I have to carry on and give him time to settle before making big changes. I just don't know how to get my spirit back.
Hopefully I'll take a sleeping tablet, and hopefully it'll work and I'll get a few hours sleep. I just feel like I've been in a car crash. my brain won't work, my heart is playing up with the stress and my polymyalgia which has been in abeyance is getting worse. AND I just can't face another day like today.
I'm sorry for such a hopeless post but I know you've probably all been there and I hope you have advice or inspiration to get me going again.
Good night, sleep tight, dont let the bed bugs bite.
Jackie
He is still only 64 he is phsically fit, fully mobile, fully active though lacks the motivation or mental ability to do virtually anything except try and pick an argument with me. He is completely confused, distressed and has almost no short term memory but never shuts up. He has refused all along to go to any kind of daycare, and sticks to me like glue, questioning or disputing everything I try to say OR do.
Because of this I have moved us up north where all my family live to get the support of my son and sisters. We've only been here 2 weeks and I know thats too soon for that support to start helping how I FEEL.
Our son has done loads to help us so far but he's got his own probs. too much work, pregnant wife with a very sick pregnancy, busy on their new home. He's taken his dad out to give me a break but so far John won't spend time on his own or with my sisters etc.. Hopefully that will change as he gets more settled here. My sister has reminded me that the move alone will have have completely discombobulated him, and that its very early days.
I know all of that but I just feel I need to get away from him for a break or to get him to agree to regular day care. I know I have to carry on and give him time to settle before making big changes. I just don't know how to get my spirit back.
Hopefully I'll take a sleeping tablet, and hopefully it'll work and I'll get a few hours sleep. I just feel like I've been in a car crash. my brain won't work, my heart is playing up with the stress and my polymyalgia which has been in abeyance is getting worse. AND I just can't face another day like today.
I'm sorry for such a hopeless post but I know you've probably all been there and I hope you have advice or inspiration to get me going again.
Good night, sleep tight, dont let the bed bugs bite.
Jackie