Activities Co-Ordinator Job : feedback
- Thread starter jamesbrown333
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Martyn's question just shows us what sort of people we are up against, doesn't it? Arrogant professionals (or paid staff) who only want to show off their own importance but don't really care! In here we can switch them to "ignore" but unfortunately they aren't so easy to ignore in real life. I can only hope I never get put in a place run by people like you.
Lila
Lila
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Hi Lila
I always prefer to think of them as idealists, who really want to believe that these procedures and actions work. They really do want to do the best job, and are taught these things.
It is the practical application of procedures that shows whether or not they work.
We can temper their idealism with reality and help them understand and therefore do as good a job as is possible.
I do think that, in particular
It is a personal opinion, first of all and is not universal.
Care homes and their staff vary according to place - and time, and pressures on the commercial side of that business. We know there is no shortage of need - rather, a shortage of good homes.
It is easy to see that a care home might elect to replace a difficult resident/family with one that is more acquiescent.
Even if that might not happen, it is always the fear.
Understanding the fears and insecurietes of the families is a key thing for care home staff.
I always prefer to think of them as idealists, who really want to believe that these procedures and actions work. They really do want to do the best job, and are taught these things.
It is the practical application of procedures that shows whether or not they work.
We can temper their idealism with reality and help them understand and therefore do as good a job as is possible.
I do think that, in particular
was not well-chosen.
It is a personal opinion, first of all and is not universal.
Care homes and their staff vary according to place - and time, and pressures on the commercial side of that business. We know there is no shortage of need - rather, a shortage of good homes.
It is easy to see that a care home might elect to replace a difficult resident/family with one that is more acquiescent.
Even if that might not happen, it is always the fear.
Understanding the fears and insecurietes of the families is a key thing for care home staff.
Sorry if I upset anyone but I stand completely by what I said. I do speak from experience allbeit relatively brief. I have seen people sacked recently for not doing the job properly. In our home it is also a sackable offence for not speaking English.
I think someone said that this industry is more regulated than Nuclear Power and from what I have experienced that's not far wrong.
If I do not do a good job, especially in this line of work, I would expect to receive a complaint and rightly so. If I make a mistake then I am ready to learn from it.
If you dont complain then I am afraid that you are your own worst enemy.
As for having a relative evicted because you made a complaint I think the press would have a field day if this happened and would be extremely detrimental to the home.
As for your very personal comment Lila you do not know me and I certainly dont know you - the whole point of a forum is to put a point of view. Resorting to personal abuse does not do anyone any good.
regards
Martyn
I think someone said that this industry is more regulated than Nuclear Power and from what I have experienced that's not far wrong.
If I do not do a good job, especially in this line of work, I would expect to receive a complaint and rightly so. If I make a mistake then I am ready to learn from it.
If you dont complain then I am afraid that you are your own worst enemy.
As for having a relative evicted because you made a complaint I think the press would have a field day if this happened and would be extremely detrimental to the home.
As for your very personal comment Lila you do not know me and I certainly dont know you - the whole point of a forum is to put a point of view. Resorting to personal abuse does not do anyone any good.
regards
Martyn
Can I try to diffuse this, please.
Dear Martyn.
I admire your idealism, and enthusiasm for your work. I wish there were more people and more homes with such integrity.
Infortunately, there are some or us who have had very distressing experiences, not from the dark ages, but in recent times.
I can only speak from my own experience, but take on board similar experiences of other members of TP.
The same way, I take on board the reports of impeccable care, received by the nearest and dearest of many other members of TP.
I did complain, and am afraid my mother suffered the consequences. My complaint was addressed, investigated and reported on. Correct procedures were followed at every level.
It was the aftermath that caused the problem. It is the aftermath that affects relatives who, by that time, are equally as vulnerable as the resident.
I did move my mother to a better home but that took ages to organize. It involved liaison between SS, SW, both homes, assessment and finance. All this was only AFTER I had searched for and visited countless alternative homes.
I would not wish to go through that again.
If you were able to read between the lines, or had taken the time and trouble to read the previous posts of someone recently bereaved, you might be more understanding that she was judgemental towards you, possibly because of your lack of empathy.
I sincerely hope you never witness or experience this sort of issue.
This Forum is for us all to express our points of view, but when emotions are raw, it is often difficult to remain objective.
This is a two way process.
Can we please leave it at that, without causing any more hurt.
Dear Martyn.
I admire your idealism, and enthusiasm for your work. I wish there were more people and more homes with such integrity.
Infortunately, there are some or us who have had very distressing experiences, not from the dark ages, but in recent times.
I can only speak from my own experience, but take on board similar experiences of other members of TP.
The same way, I take on board the reports of impeccable care, received by the nearest and dearest of many other members of TP.
I did complain, and am afraid my mother suffered the consequences. My complaint was addressed, investigated and reported on. Correct procedures were followed at every level.
It was the aftermath that caused the problem. It is the aftermath that affects relatives who, by that time, are equally as vulnerable as the resident.
I did move my mother to a better home but that took ages to organize. It involved liaison between SS, SW, both homes, assessment and finance. All this was only AFTER I had searched for and visited countless alternative homes.
I would not wish to go through that again.
If you were able to read between the lines, or had taken the time and trouble to read the previous posts of someone recently bereaved, you might be more understanding that she was judgemental towards you, possibly because of your lack of empathy.
I sincerely hope you never witness or experience this sort of issue.
This Forum is for us all to express our points of view, but when emotions are raw, it is often difficult to remain objective.
This is a two way process.
Can we please leave it at that, without causing any more hurt.
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Hi Martyn,
I am all for enthusiasm and believe that activity co-ordinators are definitely needed in NH's. My Mum and I would always take some activity in when we visited Dad and were very happy when it stimulated a response.
My Dad's Home did have an activity co-ordinator, but she left and was not replaced. I felt it was rude of me to keep asking when another one would be brought in and I did not want to be singled out as a trouble maker, even if we were entitled to "value for money". Although there are complaints procedures in place, I don't feel it should be up to relatives to keep complaining about standards of care, especially when they are already feeling emotionally vulnerable themselves.
I am not going to apologise for saying that, in our experience, the care and attention shown by many of the care staff in Dad's Home was, by far and above, more precious than any time given by any activity co-ordinators. These particular care staff would, among all their other tasks, also sometimes put on music, dance with residents, speak kindly to and understand relatives feelings etc. The latter was very important to me, as it was my Mum and I who became my Dad's "activity co-ordinator" when there was nothing else we could do for him.
I hope you can take this as constructive criticism and not as a personal dig. If you had read many of Lila's posts you would understand what a caring daughter she was and I know she would have done whatever was in her power to "do something about it" if it had been appropriate.
That said - keep up the good work!!
I am all for enthusiasm and believe that activity co-ordinators are definitely needed in NH's. My Mum and I would always take some activity in when we visited Dad and were very happy when it stimulated a response.
My Dad's Home did have an activity co-ordinator, but she left and was not replaced. I felt it was rude of me to keep asking when another one would be brought in and I did not want to be singled out as a trouble maker, even if we were entitled to "value for money". Although there are complaints procedures in place, I don't feel it should be up to relatives to keep complaining about standards of care, especially when they are already feeling emotionally vulnerable themselves.
I am not going to apologise for saying that, in our experience, the care and attention shown by many of the care staff in Dad's Home was, by far and above, more precious than any time given by any activity co-ordinators. These particular care staff would, among all their other tasks, also sometimes put on music, dance with residents, speak kindly to and understand relatives feelings etc. The latter was very important to me, as it was my Mum and I who became my Dad's "activity co-ordinator" when there was nothing else we could do for him.
I hope you can take this as constructive criticism and not as a personal dig. If you had read many of Lila's posts you would understand what a caring daughter she was and I know she would have done whatever was in her power to "do something about it" if it had been appropriate.
That said - keep up the good work!!
Martyn said:
Hello again Martyn,
The evictions followed some months later and were a product of, I believe, the home taking exception to the monitoring that I felt I had to do, over so many failings in the care. I can assure you that going to the press crossed my mind very often, but I never went down that road for a number of carefully considered reasons.
Firstly, it would entail a breach of my mother's privacy, secondly, it would label me and my family, very publicly, as 'troublesome' and might jeopardise the potential to find other care providers, thirdly, once things come into the so-called 'public domain', it is almost impossible to predict where the story will end.
Maybe I was wrong, but when someone is put under thirty days notice to quit, there are more urgent things to do than worry about handling the media.
People ask for feedback, but do they really want it, or just to be praised and endorsed for doing what they have already decided to do? (E.g. inflicting the Sound of Music a hundred times on a captive audience ...)
When people say "why?" or "why not?" it generally seems to be a waste of effort explaining as they aren't really listening, unless it supports what they've already decided.
When I was in a hospital ward where most of the patients were elderly and more than half of them in various states of dementia ("bedblockers", waiting for suitable places in homes) there was a noisy TV right near my bed, left on from breakfast time till after midnight. When I tried switching it off, or changing channels, or even turning it down, it was the staff, not the patients, who complained. Luckily I knew I was only there for a few weeks, for some it would probably be for the rest of their lives. I'd hoped things had changed a bit since then.
I could add a whole lot more but I don't suppose anyone wants to know.
When people say "why?" or "why not?" it generally seems to be a waste of effort explaining as they aren't really listening, unless it supports what they've already decided.
When I was in a hospital ward where most of the patients were elderly and more than half of them in various states of dementia ("bedblockers", waiting for suitable places in homes) there was a noisy TV right near my bed, left on from breakfast time till after midnight. When I tried switching it off, or changing channels, or even turning it down, it was the staff, not the patients, who complained. Luckily I knew I was only there for a few weeks, for some it would probably be for the rest of their lives. I'd hoped things had changed a bit since then.
I could add a whole lot more but I don't suppose anyone wants to know.
I have been reading this thread and I think you are being unfair to Martyn. He seems to be a caring person, who is trying to do a good job.
He admits he might get it wrong sometimes, none of us are perfect, at least he is trying.
Lila you sound very bitter and I do believe that most hospitals have private televisions, phones etc by each bed.
A very dear friend of mine has worked in a care home, which was understaffed, the pay is poor. She left because there was too much expected of her and she couldn't cope.
I have my mum 82 Alzheimers and Arthritic living with us and caring for her takes up alot of my time.
If it were possible to have a one on one care service in these homes,I still think there would be things that some relatives would find to complain about.
None of my siblings complain about my mums care, because they know I do my best for her.
I'm sure in most homes, carers are doing there best, I don't think I could cope if I had a few 'mums' to look after.
Take Care Bye for now
Janetruth x
He admits he might get it wrong sometimes, none of us are perfect, at least he is trying.
Lila you sound very bitter and I do believe that most hospitals have private televisions, phones etc by each bed.
A very dear friend of mine has worked in a care home, which was understaffed, the pay is poor. She left because there was too much expected of her and she couldn't cope.
I have my mum 82 Alzheimers and Arthritic living with us and caring for her takes up alot of my time.
If it were possible to have a one on one care service in these homes,I still think there would be things that some relatives would find to complain about.
None of my siblings complain about my mums care, because they know I do my best for her.
I'm sure in most homes, carers are doing there best, I don't think I could cope if I had a few 'mums' to look after.
Take Care Bye for now
Janetruth x
As always, these topics prove interesting because we see both sides, and both have made valid points.
These discussions work best when those participating meet somewhere in the middle ground.
Janetruth makes valid points.
The key thing to remember is that, when we have experienced bad levels of care, we should not expect that to be the case for others, either on the receiving, or on the giving end.
Likewise, when we have experienced good levels of care, we should not expect that to be the case for others, either on the receiving, or on the giving end.
We should not tar either the givers or the receivers using a brush that has been dipped in the pot of good - or of bad - care.
In particular, we should not pass our anger on to people who have not been involved in causing the anger, and who do not know our history.
As well, those who provide care should not be offended unduly when they get some harsh, though undeserved words from someone who has suffered in the past from bad care. We all need thick skins in DementiaWorld though I know we can't always have them.
For the care workers, at the end of things, it is a job; for the family, it is their life and their loved ones that may have been badly compromised.
These discussions work best when those participating meet somewhere in the middle ground.
Janetruth makes valid points.
The key thing to remember is that, when we have experienced bad levels of care, we should not expect that to be the case for others, either on the receiving, or on the giving end.
Likewise, when we have experienced good levels of care, we should not expect that to be the case for others, either on the receiving, or on the giving end.
We should not tar either the givers or the receivers using a brush that has been dipped in the pot of good - or of bad - care.
In particular, we should not pass our anger on to people who have not been involved in causing the anger, and who do not know our history.
As well, those who provide care should not be offended unduly when they get some harsh, though undeserved words from someone who has suffered in the past from bad care. We all need thick skins in DementiaWorld though I know we can't always have them.
For the care workers, at the end of things, it is a job; for the family, it is their life and their loved ones that may have been badly compromised.
Well having received what can only be described as a disgusting PM from Lila, I feel it is time to leave this forum.
I have no doubt that she has suffered but that is nothing to do with me.
I am not so naive as to believe that everything is perfect in the Care Home World but surely if you do not voice you complaints and follow them through how will things ever change?
Anyway thanks to all who advised me when I first started and to James who started this thread I have to say- Please dont be put off by what has been said on here. You can make a difference even if at times you think you are banging your head against a brick wall.
Goodbye
Martyn
I have no doubt that she has suffered but that is nothing to do with me.
I am not so naive as to believe that everything is perfect in the Care Home World but surely if you do not voice you complaints and follow them through how will things ever change?
Anyway thanks to all who advised me when I first started and to James who started this thread I have to say- Please dont be put off by what has been said on here. You can make a difference even if at times you think you are banging your head against a brick wall.
Goodbye
Martyn
How sad that a thread which started so positively has ended in this way!
I know that all of us who care for loved ones with dementia are raw and hurt, but I wish we could support each other and the professionals who want to work with us, in a more generous spirit. Yes there are some dreadful cases of bad carers, and I have had personal experience of this, but that makes it all the more important to have this section of the forum so that good practice and ideas can be shared.
Having returned to TP after an absence following my father's death, I have been quite shocked at times by the change of tone in some posts, not just in this section. We have enough battles to fight without turning on each other and the people who genuinely want to help!
Good luck to both Martyn and James. Yes I'm sure they will sometimes get things wrong, but they are caring people who are trying to do their best to make lives a little bit better for dementia patients. We need people like them and should make them feel welcome to this particular part of the forum.
Blue sea
I know that all of us who care for loved ones with dementia are raw and hurt, but I wish we could support each other and the professionals who want to work with us, in a more generous spirit. Yes there are some dreadful cases of bad carers, and I have had personal experience of this, but that makes it all the more important to have this section of the forum so that good practice and ideas can be shared.
Having returned to TP after an absence following my father's death, I have been quite shocked at times by the change of tone in some posts, not just in this section. We have enough battles to fight without turning on each other and the people who genuinely want to help!
Good luck to both Martyn and James. Yes I'm sure they will sometimes get things wrong, but they are caring people who are trying to do their best to make lives a little bit better for dementia patients. We need people like them and should make them feel welcome to this particular part of the forum.
Blue sea
I didn't get the activities job and I have been made dedundant today.
The Home Manager niece got the job, I feel like I've been through 10 rounds with mike tyson today. I really wanted this job, now I just need to wait and see if this woman will stick at it and keep applying for other jobs. Sorry to end on a downer!
The Home Manager niece got the job, I feel like I've been through 10 rounds with mike tyson today. I really wanted this job, now I just need to wait and see if this woman will stick at it and keep applying for other jobs. Sorry to end on a downer!
Sorry to hear that James. You were obviously so enthusiastic. Sounds like the jobs been won on genes rather than merit. There'll be other other jobs, hopefully one that's better for you. Good luck in your search.
Hi James
I'm sorry you didn't get your job, it's a terrible blow to the self-esteem. Please keep applying, it's great that people like you want to learn from the forum. I'm sure you'd be good at the job.
Martyn, I hope you'll come back to us. I hope you've learned something from us. We carers are vulnerable and sensitive. We've had to fight many battles for our loved ones, and not all care homes are as good as yours. Some people have had some very painful experiences, as you'll know if you've been reading the main forum.
But we also have things to learn from you. It would be a shame to break a relationship which can benefit us all.
Good luck, both
I'm sorry you didn't get your job, it's a terrible blow to the self-esteem. Please keep applying, it's great that people like you want to learn from the forum. I'm sure you'd be good at the job.
Martyn, I hope you'll come back to us. I hope you've learned something from us. We carers are vulnerable and sensitive. We've had to fight many battles for our loved ones, and not all care homes are as good as yours. Some people have had some very painful experiences, as you'll know if you've been reading the main forum.
But we also have things to learn from you. It would be a shame to break a relationship which can benefit us all.
Good luck, both
I`m sorry you didn`t get the job James, especially when the interview procedure didn`t seem to be conducted fairly.
If you weren`t the best for the job, then fair enough, but when nepotism rears it`s ugly head, you are entitled to be more than just disappointed.
Keep trying. There might be something better on the cards for you.
If you weren`t the best for the job, then fair enough, but when nepotism rears it`s ugly head, you are entitled to be more than just disappointed.
Keep trying. There might be something better on the cards for you.
Good news, she has left and it looks like I will be invited for a interview. I will tell you what happens.
