Care Homes

[petromany]

Hi, after another horrendous day with hubby, am really thinking that he would be better with 24 care now. He continues to be in denial, and apart from the Dementia/Alzheimers is really quite fit. Was interested in Sussexsue, witzend remarks about the care home in West Sussex, and I would greatly appreciate her help and guidance. He is going into respite at the end of March, and I cant wait, however I know when he comes home it will start all over again, and I am nearly at rock bottom. I have really tried and tried to cope, but feel I am sinking fast. He has an assessment booked with the G.P next week, but I already know the outcome and what does one do , he wont go of his own accord, and ss want him to stay home as long as possible with help. As we are self funding it seems you are alone and have to get on with things yourself, cant see any light at the end of the tunnel.

Sorry I am moaning and I am sure there are people far worse off than me. Just would like someone to care for me for a change, I am 75 this year and feel my life is slipping rapidly away. Sorry...................

 

[PeggySmith]

Hi petromany,

I don't really have any advice to give except that if you think a care home will be needed in the future, get a list and ring round NOW. I didn't and have missed out on the best one. I know it's a big step, but it's worth doing.

By the way, start a new post and say which LA you live in then ask people to PM you with recommendations. I live in the UK's smallest LA and we've got quite a list going

 

[sussexsue]

Hi,

another member kindly let me know about this post, as I only dip into TP occasionally these days and would probably have missed it.

I have pm'd you with details of where mum was - hope this helps.

I would add that when I met with the CH manager she really understood what I was going through and was so supportive. She made me feel very proud of how I had coped to date, but was quite shocked at how dependent mum had become on me (I think that was actually the hardest thing to deal with).

Hope respite works out for you, and makes the decision for your husband's future clearer. There does just come a time when you cannot cope any longer. SS putting any plan in place wont change things, because you are just so low that a "sticking plaster" solution is not the answer.

take care

Sue xx

 

[Witzend]

Hi, after another horrendous day with hubby, am really thinking that he would be better with 24 care now. He continues to be in denial, and apart from the Dementia/Alzheimers is really quite fit. Was interested in Sussexsue, witzend remarks about the care home in West Sussex, and I would greatly appreciate her help and guidance. He is going into respite at the end of March, and I cant wait, however I know when he comes home it will start all over again, and I am nearly at rock bottom. I have really tried and tried to cope, but feel I am sinking fast. He has an assessment booked with the G.P next week, but I already know the outcome and what does one do , he wont go of his own accord, and ss want him to stay home as long as possible with help. As we are self funding it seems you are alone and have to get on with things yourself, cant see any light at the end of the tunnel.

Sorry I am moaning and I am sure there are people far worse off than me. Just would like someone to care for me for a change, I am 75 this year and feel my life is slipping rapidly away. Sorry...................

Hi, Petromany - I have probably mentioned a CH in Bognor that was fantastic with my FIL, but it was ages ago now so might not be any use. However I will google and see if they're still going - please feel free to PM me. So sorry you've got all this stress and worry.

PS - just googled and they're still going, but whether under same management I can't say. It says they can cope with 'challenging behaviour' . Please PM me if you want details. All the best.

 

[petromany]

Care Homes-Petromany

Hi, Many thanks for your message, having a lot of trauma at thge mooment, but as soon as I get a chance, will go into matters more deeply. I really do appreciate all your advice. Take care.......