Dad in steep decline.

Daisy48

Registered User
Sep 7, 2012
120
0
North Staffordshire
My poor Dad is really unwell.

He is like a shell,he barely recognises us and can hardly keep his eyes open.

He's been like this since the last seizure 2 weeks ago. He seems to be getting worse by the day.Even the carers who have been off for a few days have been upset when they have returned to work and seen how Dad has deteriorated.

It feels so wrong to want your Dad to slip away but I do...

I feel so sad,can't cry,my throat goes into spasm,like a great big lump is stuck there.
 

ROSEANN

Registered User
Oct 1, 2006
909
0
75
staffordshire
It is`nt wrong my family and I have been wishing this for the last year.
I really feel for you your dad is such a lovely man and is now a shadow of the man who came to the home last year.
You know I am here for you if needed.
Love Roseann xx
 

LisaQ

Registered User
Apr 3, 2012
29
0
Somerset
best wishes

My Dad had seizures that took him gradually further away. In the end they were a blessing in disguise. We spoke to his Dr and nursing home staff and it was agreed to let him slip away. All treatment was stopped and he was given food and drink to keep him comfortable. We stopped forcing complan/build up drinks down him and increased his pain killing medicine. It was a very difficult time but we knew that these were the decisions that he would have made had he been able.
He passed away peacefully last September. I miss him so much and everytime I drive past his old nursing home (it's on my way home from work) I wish I could see him one more time. My heart aches and I still cry everytime I think about my lovley dad, but letting him go was the very best thing we could do for him.
Make sure he is comfortable and that he is recieving adequate analgesia. Even if you have to nag a bit, as I had to. Stay strong. I hope this helps.
Lisa x
 

Pheath

Registered User
Dec 31, 2009
1,094
0
UK
Dear Daisy
No words of real comfort except to say I’m so sorry to hear of your dad’s decline. It must be incredibly painful for you to witness and your feelings of wanting him to be at peace are completely natural given the circumstances. Wishing you strength to get through this difficult time and hope your dad is at least comfortable and in no way suffering. I’ll be hoping he makes a come-back. Take good care, Px
 

Big Effort

Account Closed
Jul 8, 2012
1,927
0
Dear Daisy,

Me too, I can't help or do anything, or suggest anything......
It is just another of the dreadful things about this disease, it runs its course, and we feel so helpless, are helpless.
You are being so brave, it is so dreadfully, dreadfully sad. Still, I am sure he values your being there, your caring, ensuring he is looked after and kept comfortable...... At the end of the day what counts is to have kind loving people there when the going is tough.
I am thinking of you, your Dad. With a great big hug of virtual support ,but heartfelt, BE
 

jan1962

Registered User
May 19, 2012
717
0
bedlington northumberland
Daisy48.

i feel your pain and know what it is like at the end of this horrid illness. my MIL who passed away in December was like this at the end and i felt so helpless and at times angry that she would give up the fight.

it is not wrong to have these feelings it is only natural we want them out of pain. as long as he is comfortable and free of pain that is all we could wish for at this time. do not beat your self up.

your tears will come in time and you may feel that they will never stop as once the flood gates open that is how it feels.

you must remember the good time you had with your dad talk to him about these he can hear you tell him you love him he can go over to the better life that awaits him.

sending you much love and support at this difficult time, feel free to PM if you want.
he is lucky to have such a loving daughter.


jan1962
 

Daisy48

Registered User
Sep 7, 2012
120
0
North Staffordshire
Thankyou all for your kindness.

When I visited Dad after school today,he'd been walking(with help)!

He still can't talk,feed himself etc and when we talked to him, he didn't seem able to focus....we still tried though.

The staff are very caring and are giving us a day to day update.The Gp is trying Dad off seizure meds for a few days,so that might be why he is a tiny bit more "awake" today.

However they have told us to expect more seizures,which they can try to cope with at the home without the need for Dad to go into A and E.

My sister and I gave the unit manager a hug when we left...she say's she sees her role as caring for families as well as the residents and she certainly does that.

love to all who are travelling along this rocky road.x
 

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