Tricky few days

Daisy48

Registered User
Sep 7, 2012
120
0
North Staffordshire
The last few days have been very stressful .Dad has had three seizures in 8 days and has deteriorated with each one.He seems weakened,capable of only a minimum of eligble words and looks sad,lonely and lost.
My sister spent 14 hours in A and E on Friday,not daring(or wanting) to leave him because his speech is so poor and every staff member needs information,so you find yourself going over and over all the details.

We were ready to leave (ambulance booked for Dad) when he had another seizure.This was scary as we'd moved to the despatch unit and suddenly there were people running from everywhere. Back round to A and E. We were then in a queue to wait for a queue outside the acute medical ward and there were 16 in front of us in the corridor.I refused the first place that became available as Dad kept flinging of his covers and ripping off his pad.I didn't want him in a corridor...can you believe that we have a brand new state of the art hospital!

To be fair the staff were wonderful individually but in general folk with dementia have a tricky time in hospital.So we were glad when Dad was allowed back to his nursing home,where everyone knows him and his needs.

I think everything caught up with me as I burst into tears today,the first time in weeks.
I didn't cry when Dad broke his pelvis in December or when we went to A and E in Jan .
I can't stop when I start blubbering and I've been on anti depressants since the summer so I thought that I could hold it together...wrong!

I feel so much pain and sadness for my lovely Dad.
 

NeverGiveUp

Registered User
May 17, 2011
1,034
0
I think your dad is a very lucky person to have you around, not everyone has someone to fight their corner. It is after all the stress that the shock hits you.

I've waiting for far too many hours in A&E, I know what it is like, I feel for you, it isn't good.

Try to get a good night's sleep.
 

SisterAct

Registered User
Jul 5, 2011
2,255
0
71
Liverpool, Merseyside
Hi Daisy48
I hope you managed to get some sleep, you must be exhausted mentally and physically. We used to dread Dad having an accident or chest infections and having to go into hospital. They are just so under-staffed and he would be left there for ages (same as everyone else) but it is worse with the dementia. Dad was lucky as we were always with him but what about dementia patients on their own. They were sometimes seen as being drunk or just a nuisance because of their behaviour. Poor things, cant imagine how scared they must have been.

You and your sister are doing a great job, your Dad is so lucky to have you.
Polly x
 

Misprint

Registered User
Sep 13, 2012
65
0
So sorry about the dreadful time you had at the hospital. I know what you mean about crying, I am not a full time carer but my sister and I have always been very close. Even though we worked together we could still go out in the evening and find loads to chat about. I so miss that but most of the time I hold it together and then she may look a certain way or say something and I just fall apart.

I hate this illness!!!!!
 

Daisy48

Registered User
Sep 7, 2012
120
0
North Staffordshire
Thankyou for your kind messages.

Barb and Polly,just realised last night when I caught up with TP of your recent loss.I'm so glad that your Dad is at peace,it's what I wish for my lovely Dad.Your family seems as close as mine.I think that you did a sterling job and I hope that my sister and I can carry on doing as much for Dad as we can to make this time easier for him.

Well today is a day of mixed emotion,it's my birthday and at 49 I miss my Mum (who died nearly 13 years ago) and of course my Dad who has no idea that it's my birthday.

I didn't sleep well and I'm just about to leave for work.Twenty nine 8 and 9 year olds will definitely see me through the day...I defy anyone to be sad for very long around children.

Straight after work my sister(who is a teaching assistant like me) will go and see our Dad and after that I will have some time with my family to celebrate my birthday quietly.

Wishing everyone strength to get through today whatever life throws at them.
Daisy x
 

tarababe

Registered User
Sep 9, 2012
192
0
Durham
I know how you feel and my thoughts are with you at this difficult time. I am just about to put up a post myself too, if for no other reason than to get my thoughts off my chest and save my poor hubby who is so strong for me.

Try to stay strong as you are doing all you can and the love for your dad is evident. ;)
 

jan1962

Registered User
May 19, 2012
717
0
bedlington northumberland
So sorry you are having such a horrid time with your fathers illness, the love you have for him just jumps from the page. he is a real lucky man. hope he has settled back into his nursing home where he can be cared for by people who know him. taking someone into hospital with AD is not ideal as the staff do not know who to handle them or treat them, staff are run of their feet and have little time to see to the needs.

can i just say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. enjoy the day,


jan1962
 

ROSEANN

Registered User
Oct 1, 2006
909
0
75
staffordshire
Hi sweetheart
A very happy birthday to you and I hope you find Dad better tonight.
When I was at the home at lunchtime they were feeding him and he eat most of his meal he also had a drink so I think a bit of help at mealtimes will help him, I did get half a smile off him which was great,
All the best Roseann xx
 

Daisy48

Registered User
Sep 7, 2012
120
0
North Staffordshire
Thanks all.

I had a lovely rendition of Happy Birthday when I walked into class today and two birthday stickers,one in english and one in french!

Roseann;a special thankyou for your kindness,it's lovely to know that you can keep an eye on Dad too.We had some tears this evening but Dad did smile a couple of times and that is such a bonus.

love Daisy x