http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ukn...ing-elderly-into-care-homes.html#dsq-comments
I daren't post my thoughts about these ignoramouses on here!
Fiona
I daren't post my thoughts about these ignoramouses on here!
Fiona
Care Homes - They are all your fault!
- Thread starter FifiMo
- Start date
let's name names, Norman Lamb, shame on you.
it would be lovely if we could all look after our neighbours but it would also be invasive and leave the elderly and vulnerable open to exploitation. besides which, those of us who are likely to care are probably already caring for our own elderly or fragile relatives, not to mention our children (let's blame the parents for everything that goes wrong there, don't forget) and our spouses.
yes, I will help my neighbours out. But do for them what I do for my mum? Never.
it would be lovely if we could all look after our neighbours but it would also be invasive and leave the elderly and vulnerable open to exploitation. besides which, those of us who are likely to care are probably already caring for our own elderly or fragile relatives, not to mention our children (let's blame the parents for everything that goes wrong there, don't forget) and our spouses.
yes, I will help my neighbours out. But do for them what I do for my mum? Never.
Neither can I Fiona
Neglectful! My armpit! Does Mr Lamb really think that carers force the elderly (and not so elderly) into a CH without a lot of soul searching.After the battles I've had (and many carers have had far harder battles with officialdom) to get some help and keep my husband out of a CH how dare he bleat on when the coalition is making so many cuts which effect dementia sufferers and their families.It's alright for him with his undeserved large salary. The daycare centre my Pete goes to is a godsend for me.However, the fees will be going up this April from £20.00 ish to possibly £75.00ish because of central government cutbacks to the local authority.
Mr Lamb come and spend 24 hours at my house (or any other carer) and see the work we do for our carers allowance.On a good week I get about £0.45 per hour.Now that really is a rubbish minimum wage. I'm so angry I can't even type about this subject anymore.
QUOTE: We have lost the extended family because families have become dispersed UNQUOTE
In most articles, there is generally something I can agree with; the above, I can agree with.
But My Dearest Mr L, if you hadn't noticed, we are all living longer and therein lies a massive problem for future generations !
Sorry must dash as I have a delivery of sand coming soon so must go bury my head in the sand !
In most articles, there is generally something I can agree with; the above, I can agree with.
But My Dearest Mr L, if you hadn't noticed, we are all living longer and therein lies a massive problem for future generations !
Sorry must dash as I have a delivery of sand coming soon so must go bury my head in the sand !
I could get seriously rich by persuading somebody to give me a pound for each time I suggest that the solution to most of our problems is to have our Masters spend just one week reading the threads on TP. That would give them a badly needed reality check.
He highlighted work done by Leeds city council, which has encouraged residents, including the elderly, to “self-manage” health conditions
I would invite this Lib Dem Minister to come and assess my mother and her ability to self manage any aspect of her life, from taking tablets (which she will not) to changing her own incontinence pads and a million other things. I would also like him to persuade her to eat. Unless he pinned her down, he would not be able to get a morsle of food into her.
All his policy will do is fill up hospital beds with permanent, chronic mental and physical illness which needs 24/7 management.
He has never lived with the hourly worry which most of us here on TP have to do!
I only wish we could all, each and every one of us take the time to write to him and give him an accounty of daily living with dementia and complex health problems.
Shall we all do it?
xxTinaT
I would invite this Lib Dem Minister to come and assess my mother and her ability to self manage any aspect of her life, from taking tablets (which she will not) to changing her own incontinence pads and a million other things. I would also like him to persuade her to eat. Unless he pinned her down, he would not be able to get a morsle of food into her.
All his policy will do is fill up hospital beds with permanent, chronic mental and physical illness which needs 24/7 management.
He has never lived with the hourly worry which most of us here on TP have to do!
I only wish we could all, each and every one of us take the time to write to him and give him an accounty of daily living with dementia and complex health problems.
Shall we all do it?
xxTinaT
As i have posted before, when reading or listening to a politician always ask yourself
"Why is this lying b*****d lying to me?"
John.
"Why is this lying b*****d lying to me?"
John.
I'm so cross (I know I said I couldn't write anything else about it) This has been on my mind since my last post re this subject. Yes I'm going to give him a piece of my mind. I'm going to get his office email address and give it to the twerp with both barrels.I'm normally very mild mannered so if I'm up in arms beware!
I'm going to copy and post my reaction on here and e mail it. If anyone else would like me to put their posts in the e mail, please let me know by PM
xxTinaT
xxTinaT
Sorry Tina
I've already sent my opinion to Mr Lamb.I came back to show you a copy of what I've sent. I'm so cross I don't think that it is very grammatically correct or well composed.
01/01/2013
Mr Lamb
As a full time carer I do not have very much spare time in my day however, I felt compelled to write to you regarding your comments in The Daily Telegraph.
You stated that ‘older people were being let down by their friends and neighbours who should help them to live independently at home.’ My Husband, Peter, suffers from bi-polar and Alzheimer’s. He has been ill for 7 years. His friends have been very supportive during this time but I think that they would draw the line at attending to his personal needs; (toileting for instance). I wouldn’t expect them to lend a hand in that direction-that has been left up to me. The only reason my Husband is still at home is because I am his full time carer; I am 54 years of age and I never envisaged having to give up my life to care for him in this way. No he doesn’t live an ‘independent life’ he needs 24 hour care. He doesn’t recognise his own home and I live in fear that he will get out of the house and something terrible will happen to him. If I went to work I would have to pay at least three times my hourly rate to have carers in. However, at least I have done my bit to ‘reduce the burden on the state by avoiding the need for as many people to be moved into residential care’. Three cheers for me!
You talk of a ‘partnership between state and society’. In my opinion this statement is very one- sided. The ‘partnership between state (the Government) and Society (carers/friends neighbours) is a cost saving exercise heavily weighted in your non-caring favour. You state that ‘We all have a part to play’ so I ask you Mr Lamb when is your Party going to play your part? I play my part everyday. I save the NHS hundreds of pounds every week by looking after my Husband, yet when I asked for help recently (I only wanted day-care for my Husband for 2 sessions a week) I was told that, due to his needs, care would be very difficult to find. I had to study the Mental Health Act and The Human Rights Act to find ammunition to get any help. I did this research in the early hours of the morning when my Husband was having a few hours sleep. I couldn’t do any research in the daytime as when I say I am a full time carer it involves a minimum of 105 hours a week. Why am I complaining? After all I do get the carers allowance of £58.75 a week (no minimum wage for carers- shame on the coalition). Oh! And, of course, I did get the invaluable advice dished out from my Husband’s CPN who told me I could take an aspirin for my stress headaches, (such a dear- she gave my that advice and she didn’t even charge me for it)
Forgive me for sounding bitter Mr Lamb but when I read your comments about ‘We all have a part to play’ and ‘…we just expect the state to do everything’ I wonder what you are going on about. Carers do their part, and we very quickly learn that the state does hardly anything. I strongly object to be accused of being a part of a ‘neglectful society’ where the elderly are driven into care homes because they lack support from their families.
You talk of the elderly ‘self-managing’ health conditions. This could possibly work in some cases but not with Dementia sufferers. You could give my Husband ‘control of public money…to help him live independently’-but he wouldn’t live would he? He doesn’t know how to live from minute to minute. He wouldn’t get dressed. He couldn’t make a cup of tea. He wouldn’t be safe. He would be exploited. There are thousands of people in the UK with the same problems.
I challenge you to go to the Talking Point section on the Alzheimer’s website and read the heartbreaking and desperate cases that are posted everyday. Your name has been mentioned a great deal today-I’m afraid none of the comments have been flattering.
Please, in future, think about what you are saying-you have upset a great many people.
Yours faithfully,
Lyn T
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"I've already sent my opinion to Mr Lamb.I came back to show you a copy of what I've sent. I'm so cross I don't think that it is very grammatically correct or well composed."
Well done! I thought it very well composed, Your anger shows in every line, while still restrained. If only I thought he'd read it.
Well done! I thought it very well composed, Your anger shows in every line, while still restrained. If only I thought he'd read it.
Bravo!
Not in this position yet but certainly got me fuming.
Well done, I thought your reply was to the point, heart-felt & (hopefully) effective.
Look forward to hearing his response!
Not in this position yet but certainly got me fuming.
Well done, I thought your reply was to the point, heart-felt & (hopefully) effective.
Look forward to hearing his response!
Mr Lamb evidently has never had to care for a relative with Dementia, Alzheimers, Parkinson's oh the list is endless!
I would be interested to find out actually if his parents are still alive, are they in care? Do they have carers in regularly as you can be damned sure with his 'busy' life he wouldn't be round theirs wiping bottoms and cleaning up sh+*!
What a complete twonk!
I would be interested to find out actually if his parents are still alive, are they in care? Do they have carers in regularly as you can be damned sure with his 'busy' life he wouldn't be round theirs wiping bottoms and cleaning up sh+*!
What a complete twonk!
I am actually too angry and too many thoughts going around in my mind to respond to Mr Lamb directly.
From all of us who have not only cared for our loved ones, but put our own lives and health on hold to do so. For those who daily care for partners, even when any resemblance of a relationship has long gone. For those who care for parents, often when that care is rejected on a daily basis. The emotional battle all of us go through when we have to admit that we can no longer cope and deem a Care Home the best solution.
Well done Mr Lamb, just keep feeding the Guilt Monster.
From all of us who have not only cared for our loved ones, but put our own lives and health on hold to do so. For those who daily care for partners, even when any resemblance of a relationship has long gone. For those who care for parents, often when that care is rejected on a daily basis. The emotional battle all of us go through when we have to admit that we can no longer cope and deem a Care Home the best solution.
Well done Mr Lamb, just keep feeding the Guilt Monster.
I've emailed this plonker. It wasn't as good as the email I've read on here but I wanted to put across the following points to him:
Has he cared for an eldert relative?
Does he know what it's like to mop up after someone?
Has he ever wiped an elderly or not so elderly persons bottom for them?
Has he ever lived in a house where he lives in fear of getting hit with hairbrushes/TV controllers?
Has he wver had the police from 3 separate constabularies out looking for a loves one with dementia for hours not knowing what had happened to them.
Has he ever actually done battle with SS to try and get any kind of help caring in the home for someone with alzheimers?
Would he ask his neighbour to go and check on one of his relatives knowing full well they would probably end up beeing hit?
Has he ever tried to get carers into his home to deal with someone with AD who is violent? Emphasising the point that most won't knowing that they could be hurt!
Has he ever slept with one eye open not? Woken up scared every morning with no idea what the day will bring?
Like I said also, nothing comes for free, pensions are used to pay for care, hell, even people's own houses and savings they've worked for all their loves are used to pay for their care. Didn't think about this did he!
Such a lack of understanding. He would have run a mile from my m should he have visited when she lived at home.
Do you think people with ignorant opinions such as his are so ignorant because they are actually scared of the illnesses that go along with being elderly, do you think he realises that next year it could be him or his wife being diagnosed with early onset dementia? No I really don't think he does.
As my dad would say, what an armhole!
Sharon
Has he cared for an eldert relative?
Does he know what it's like to mop up after someone?
Has he ever wiped an elderly or not so elderly persons bottom for them?
Has he ever lived in a house where he lives in fear of getting hit with hairbrushes/TV controllers?
Has he wver had the police from 3 separate constabularies out looking for a loves one with dementia for hours not knowing what had happened to them.
Has he ever actually done battle with SS to try and get any kind of help caring in the home for someone with alzheimers?
Would he ask his neighbour to go and check on one of his relatives knowing full well they would probably end up beeing hit?
Has he ever tried to get carers into his home to deal with someone with AD who is violent? Emphasising the point that most won't knowing that they could be hurt!
Has he ever slept with one eye open not? Woken up scared every morning with no idea what the day will bring?
Like I said also, nothing comes for free, pensions are used to pay for care, hell, even people's own houses and savings they've worked for all their loves are used to pay for their care. Didn't think about this did he!
Such a lack of understanding. He would have run a mile from my m should he have visited when she lived at home.
Do you think people with ignorant opinions such as his are so ignorant because they are actually scared of the illnesses that go along with being elderly, do you think he realises that next year it could be him or his wife being diagnosed with early onset dementia? No I really don't think he does.
As my dad would say, what an armhole!
Sharon
Thanks Gringo.
I'm going to email a copy to my MP (conservative). I see you live in Dorset. We have such a large proportion of elderly people in the County that the resources are stretched to the limit due to the cutbacks. It's a nightmare and will only get worse in April.
I think you're right in doubting whether Mr Caring will read it.
