Letter to my grandad - is this OK do you think?

laurastubbs

Registered User
Dec 9, 2012
10
0
34
Leeds
Hello everyone,

Last night I posted about what I should do to support my grandad who at 85 is the full time carer for my Nanny who has quite advanced alzheimers. Tonight I have spoken on the phone to him about booking a doctors appointment to see if we can some extra support. I have now written him a letter to really explain why I think this is a good idea. Please let me know what you think and if I should send it?
Thank you in advance for your time again.


Hi Grandad,

I just wanted to write you a little letter. I was really worried that I might have offended you after talking to you on the phone earlier tonight. I really hope I haven’t as that is the very very last thing I wanted to do! I also don’t want you to feel like me or mum and dad are trying to tell you what to do. We all love you and Nanny so very much and want you to know that we are here to help you, in whatever way you would like.
I just can’t imagine how hard work it is for you looking after Nanny 24 hours a day, I can imagine a lot happens that we don’t see and that dealing with it on your own must be so hard and also very overwhelming. I know that you do such an amazing job and Nanny is so lucky to have you – we all know that if had been the other way round that Nanny would have done the same for you as well because she was one of the most caring and loving people that I have ever met. It is so upsetting for everyone seeing how this terrible disease is affecting and changing her so it must be a million times harder for you as her husband – I can’t imagine coping as well as you have if it ever happened to Billy.

The reason I would like to go to the doctors with you is to help me understand what kind of support there is for us all. I have done a little bit of research on the internet and I have seen that there is so much out there and also so many other people who are coping with similar situations to you that might have some really helpful advice. I think that Doctor Chuck might have some really good advice as well – I know he is a really good doctor. I also read that there may be some medication available that could help Nanny with the aggression so I think it’s really important that we tell him about that. I think that is so important that a little bit of pressure is taken from your shoulders so you can make sure you stay healthy enough (physically and mentally) to keep doing the absolutely amazing job you are doing now! We all think you are superman and I am so proud that you are my granddad – you inspire me to be a better person.

Please let us help you I promise we would never do anything without you being totally happy with it we just want the best possible care and help for you and Nanny.

You are my total hero and I love you more than I thought possible to love anyone.
Lau
xxxxxxxx
 

ROSEANN

Registered User
Oct 1, 2006
909
0
75
staffordshire
Dear Laura
You are such a caring person to be thinking of your grandad like this.
Send the letter because it says a lot of how you want to help.
I hope he takes it in the sprirt in which it was wrote.
Let us know how you get on
Love Roseann x
 

jimbo 111

Registered User
Jan 23, 2009
5,080
0
North Bucks
Hello everyone,

Last night I posted about what I should do to support my grandad who at 85 is the full time carer for my Nanny who has quite advanced alzheimers. Tonight I have spoken on the phone to him about booking a doctors appointment to see if we can some extra support. I have now written him a letter to really explain why I think this is a good idea. Please let me know what you think and if I should send it?
Thank you in advance for your time again.


Hi Grandad,

I just wanted to write you a little letter. I was really worried that I might have offended you after talking to you on the phone earlier tonight. I really hope I haven’t as that is the very very last thing I wanted to do! I also don’t want you to feel like me or mum and dad are trying to tell you what to do. We all love you and Nanny so very much and want you to know that we are here to help you, in whatever way you would like.
I just can’t imagine how hard work it is for you looking after Nanny 24 hours a day, I can imagine a lot happens that we don’t see and that dealing with it on your own must be so hard and also very overwhelming. I know that you do such an amazing job and Nanny is so lucky to have you – we all know that if had been the other way round that Nanny would have done the same for you as well because she was one of the most caring and loving people that I have ever met. It is so upsetting for everyone seeing how this terrible disease is affecting and changing her so it must be a million times harder for you as her husband – I can’t imagine coping as well as you have if it ever happened to Billy.

The reason I would like to go to the doctors with you is to help me understand what kind of support there is for us all. I have done a little bit of research on the internet and I have seen that there is so much out there and also so many other people who are coping with similar situations to you that might have some really helpful advice. I think that Doctor Chuck might have some really good advice as well – I know he is a really good doctor. I also read that there may be some medication available that could help Nanny with the aggression so I think it’s really important that we tell him about that. I think that is so important that a little bit of pressure is taken from your shoulders so you can make sure you stay healthy enough (physically and mentally) to keep doing the absolutely amazing job you are doing now! We all think you are superman and I am so proud that you are my granddad – you inspire me to be a better person.

Please let us help you I promise we would never do anything without you being totally happy with it we just want the best possible care and help for you and Nanny.

You are my total hero and I love you more than I thought possible to love anyone.
Lau
xxxxxxxx

Hello Laura
I wish one of my grandchildren would have written a similar letter to me when I was
caring for their grandmother
God Bless you my love for being such a caring person I am sure your grandad will not take offense and will be pleased.
jimbo 111
 

chris53

Registered User
Nov 9, 2009
2,929
0
London
Dear Laura, what a lovely, thoughtful, truthful letter, your grandad must be so proud of you (and nanny too) I am sure he will get help after reading your letter, I hope you all get practical help very soon, please keep posting, and take care.
Big hug
Chris x
 

laurastubbs

Registered User
Dec 9, 2012
10
0
34
Leeds
Thank you for your kind words, it really means a lot.

I just so want to do the best for the both of them and want to make sure I have no regrets later on and be thinking I wish I had.......
I'm in a difficult position as I have a very close relationship with my grandad and he tends to be a little more honest with me than my parents - perhaps it has something to do with the generation removed. Because of this I feel it is really my responsibility to make sure he gets the best possible support available.
Oh gosh I wish things could be different for him!
x
 

hiedicat

Registered User
Mar 14, 2012
47
0
Doncaster
Laura its a great letter and very supportive, knowing you love and support them both will be very helpful, even if he chooses not to see the doctor at this time, they also have to find thier own way of doing things. I have a similar problem with my dad who can be very independant and stubborn
 

hollycat

Registered User
Nov 20, 2011
1,349
0
I would hope your letter would melt the heart of ANY grandads !

Really well worded !

Wish you the best of luck and sincerely hope it works

x x x
 

wobbly

Registered User
Feb 14, 2012
313
0
Mid Wales
Laura, that is a brilliant letter!! You are so caring and concerned about your Grandad and I really hope it allows you to help him......xx
 

LYN T

Registered User
Aug 30, 2012
6,958
0
Brixham Devon
That is a great letter Laura;diplomatic and kind. Well done you!Both of your Grand parents are so lucky to have you in their lives.You couldn't have written a better letter if you tried.All the best my love. Post how you get on.

Love from Lyn T