I've been caring for my Mum for just over 2 years now and today I called SS for a assessment because I cant do it anymore on my own. And I'm feeling so guilty about it.
Mum has all the usual random problems that goes with mixed dementia and up till now I have been (ha) coping with them, but I am finding myself becoming more and more resentful of the fact that my life revolves around cooking, cleaning and trying to keep Mum happy. And in fact it's at the point now where I'm wishing for a crisis to happen so it's taken out of my hands.
And I know from reading posts on here that I shouldn't feel so guilty about what my Mum wants and only concentrate on what she needs, and she needs more than I can give her so hence the SS call, but I am sat here crying my eyes out because I feel so guilty and almost like I have betrayed? Mum by setting actions in motion that I know that she is going to hate.
(gosh that's a lot of I's in the above)
I have a partner is quite supportive and who says he understands, but sometimes gets annoyed by it all and says my 2 sisters should help more, 1 in that London who comes down about once every 2 months because she has an allotment and runs every weekend (bitter, me? Yes) so has a life and one who has health issues plus a not good relationship with Mum so she sends her husband over to Mums to make sure she is ok at night and although he is a fantastic bloke is a bit of a chocolate teapot. And I know he finds it hard because he has a quite stressful job and his own Mum has Alzheimer's.
I am so sorry for rambling, but sometimes rambling is the only thing you can do.
Mum has all the usual random problems that goes with mixed dementia and up till now I have been (ha) coping with them, but I am finding myself becoming more and more resentful of the fact that my life revolves around cooking, cleaning and trying to keep Mum happy. And in fact it's at the point now where I'm wishing for a crisis to happen so it's taken out of my hands.
And I know from reading posts on here that I shouldn't feel so guilty about what my Mum wants and only concentrate on what she needs, and she needs more than I can give her so hence the SS call, but I am sat here crying my eyes out because I feel so guilty and almost like I have betrayed? Mum by setting actions in motion that I know that she is going to hate.
(gosh that's a lot of I's in the above)
I have a partner is quite supportive and who says he understands, but sometimes gets annoyed by it all and says my 2 sisters should help more, 1 in that London who comes down about once every 2 months because she has an allotment and runs every weekend (bitter, me? Yes) so has a life and one who has health issues plus a not good relationship with Mum so she sends her husband over to Mums to make sure she is ok at night and although he is a fantastic bloke is a bit of a chocolate teapot. And I know he finds it hard because he has a quite stressful job and his own Mum has Alzheimer's.
I am so sorry for rambling, but sometimes rambling is the only thing you can do.