my mom and Wernicke korsakoff syndrome

[djwang]

hi all thanks for reading my thread.

my mom was admitted to hospital 3 weeks ago because of alcohol abuse and is suffering with wernicke korsakoff syndrome. this has come as a devasting blow to us as she is only 49 years old. i am her only child (son).
and i dont know were to start. what should i do ?
what should i be aware of in terms of her future care how this will effect her ? is it possible for myself to care for her ? what should i exspect. how do i gain control of her estate to ensure is preservation ? i have grand parents who have nt been around much because they live in Australia. they are flying in this tuesday and the impression i get is they want to liquidise her entire estate and through away the key. then go back to Australia and leave me picking up the peices. i just want to give her as much time and love as possible so we can make the best decisions by her. she still a person, she still my mom. pleae help as i have no idea were to start.

 

[eskimojo]

first things first.....speak to the drs who are involved at the hospital with your mum or if you cant be there get an appointment with them through the nurses at the hospital and get the dr to explain where you are at with this desease...also if you can get socil services to get your mum assessed for what she will need when she gets home...
hope this helps and keep posting on here as the support is brill and you can always have a moan grumble and a smile here
love jo xxx

 

[djwang]

i have the first consultation with the doctors this thursday . i am just reqlly worried about my grand parents acting on her behalf when their not next of kin. seriously the last conversation i had with them was about how thier going to sell her house and they dont even know the facts yet.

 

[nicoise]

Dear Djwang

Welcome to TP - sorry to hear about your mum's problems - and it sounds as though you've been thrown in at the deep end and are trying to sort everything out without much information just yet.

I'd recommend you try having a read on this forum to arm yourself with a bit of knowledge about your particular issues. The Society's factsheets will give you a few pointers about your mum's particular health issues, and the wider things to think about to do with planning for the future, care options available, and handling finances.

On the financial issues, you say you think your grandparents will want to liquidate her assets; it depends how much involvement your grandparents have in your mother's affairs. Quite simply, unless it's their name on the legal pieces of paper, like a lasting power of attorney, or the deeds of a house, or a bank account, they can't just liquidate her assets or access her money. So don't panic! Take your time to find out a few more facts; being next of kin doesn't give anyone the right to do legal or financial transactions on someone else's behalf unless the proper procedures have been followed first. And all those proper procedures take time to be put in place.

I hope your conversation with the doctors helps to explain how they view your mum's health issues and their suggested care plan. Until you know a little more it is impossible to make too many long term plans based on incomplete information.

I hope that helps to allay some of your fears - please do come back if you'd like to talk some more

 

[Sox]

Hi - I would just like to add it may help to have a chat with a Solicitor or Citizens Advice before your Grandparents arrive. Some Solicitors will do the first half an hour free and Citizens Advice is free. I am assuming you are an adult i.e. not under 18 - don't know if that would make a difference or not. All the best. Sox

 

[Petrina]

One way to put your grandparents off selling off your mother's house is to make dark mutterings about defrauding the authorities who will want to reclaim the cost of any care they provide from the sale of the house and the estate. That may give you space to sort out a power of attorney if she still has sufficient mental capacity to sign one or a court of protection deputyship if she doesn't.

 

[djwang]

thanks guys for the help and advice.

 

[Chemmy]

Is it worth djwang getting in touch with the local Alzheimers Society too? Does this syndrome come under their remit or is there another specific support group?

 

[Nebiroth]

Unless your mum previously granted your grandparents authority to manage her financial affairs, they can't "liquidate the estate" - no one can, the blood relationship is irrelevent in this manner. Including the next of kin.

Unless your mum granted your grandparents a power of attorney, they have no more say in the matter than anyone else.

Moreover, even if they did have such a power of attorney, the authority is not unlimited. For example, the sale of a property would have to be authorised specifically by the office of the public guardian. As would any very large financial transactions. Also, the power of attorney would have to be registered to come into force and at that point you could lodge an objection. Such objections result in an investigation, and the most likely outcome is that the courts simply appoint an independent person to manage the affairs instead.

If your mum didn't make a power of attorney, then your grandparents would have to make application to the court of protection to be granted it. Even if they were granted it (which is exceptionally unlikely, unless they take up permanent residence here), they would be kept under scrutiny and would have to keep detailed accounts of their actions. Attorneys can't benefit themselves, they only manage affairs on the person's behalf in their best interests. Again, you could lodge a complaint stating that they were abusing their authority.

Also, any attempt to shift assets from your mum to anyone else - without a good reason for doing so - would be regarded as a "deprivation of asset" by the local authority (which means giving away or disposing of money, property etc in order to reduce liability to paying care fees). They could institute actions to reclaim this.

Your gransparents may have misconceptions about how much right they have to your mum's assets. The simple answer to this is: they have no such rights. At all. Not unless your mum has already specifically granted them this.

 

[Onlyme]

Can I ask how old you are as this can change certain issues.