i lost my gran in early nov this year....i am a mess and i dont no wat to do with myself for some reason i want to cry but i am not letting myself...wat is wrong with me. im fed up im at uni (still a fresher!) and im studying to be a nurse and im on placement in jan and im so so scared that if i see a patient with dementia im just gonna burst into tears...i mean it was my b'day yesterday and i was just feelin so low that i was not gonna get a phone call from her and xmas is gonna be hard. i just wish i was with my mates from home....i dont no how i can help myself....i mean i should....but im just stuck....im going to lectures and sleepin at the mo and thats it