Two problems with food

rummer

Registered User
Jan 7, 2010
11
0
Somerset
Hi everyone

We are having issues with my mum( early on set), shes taken to taking food upstairs and hiding it, we are finding it in her draws/pockets etc, if we see her trying to take food up stairs and mention it we get a very argressive mum accusing us of starving her.

Second problem is related, she's often on her own during the day and I'll often come home to find whole loaf of bread have been eaten, blocks of cheese ( despite the fact she keeps telling me she doesn't like cheese!), have taken to buying crisps as I go and swaping my child to School dinners rather than try and keep to much food in the house!

Shes under the care of the Diabetic nurse as a diet controlled Diabetic, however had put on a stone in 6 months and I've been set the challenge of trying to get her to lose half a stone in 3 months ( after she flatly refused to go to weight watchers etc because they would just laugh at her).

If anyone has any tips or ideas on how to hand ether situation I'd be really greatful

thanks

x
 

jayne-b

Registered User
Sep 7, 2009
1,302
0
Staffs
Rummer, hello and welcome to tp

We found this so hard to handle, Mom didn't hide food but did overeat, all the wrong (but nice:)) things, she went through a stage when she gained weight although not having any other health issues or previous weight issues this didn't cause problems, sadly this was then followed by not eating enough. She would call me becuase her tummy was making funny noises, it was rumbling with hunger.

It does seem that apart from not remembering if and when they've eaten, alz/dementia sufferers also do not realise what is full or empty so controlling it is difficult.

Not much help I'm afraid, I think you are doing right by limiting what is available to snack on, maybe make sure only good foods within reach. Maybe don't make any comment to the taking of food upstairs, you will not be able to alter this behaviour, it will stop or not of it's own accord. Could you remove while she is sleeping or in the bath/shower.

I hope the diabetic nurse understands the difficulties you face helping Mum lose the weight and isn't too challenging.

Please let us know how it goes and the progress.

jayne
 

Onlyme

Registered User
Apr 5, 2010
4,992
0
UK
Hi

Was your Mum born during the WW2 or rationing? Mum was and would eat and expect us all to eat every thing set before us. She would grab food whenever she saw it and wanted to keep it for herself.

Mum has put on 3 stone and stil says they starve her.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
73,994
0
72
Dundee
Hi there. Not much help here sorry. My mum has put on loads of weight over the last year. She eats sweets, cakes, biscuits as if they're going out of fashion. My husband hasn't put on loads of weight but boy can he eat biscuits. I've read other people's posts re sweet tooth so I think it must be quite common. Even as I type the pair of them are attacking a pack of cranberry tablet handed in by our church elder!:eek:

I am constantly finding food - mostly sweets and biscuits - in mum's pockets etc. I gave her room a gutting yesterday and found a lovely bit of mouldy shortbread!!:eek:

Sorry - as I say, not much help, just lots of understanding. xx
 

chucky

Registered User
Feb 17, 2011
968
0
UK
Hi rummer, my dad had the same problem only he hid absolutely everything he could get his hands on. The food he would devour "in secret" as he thought, so i would look around the house about an hour or so after shopping and round it up, he was crafty tho so it took a while to find his hidey holes! The slimming club you mentioned is a good idea too because she would be amongst different people and i found when i went there, (i lost 5.5 stone with them,) no one ever laughed or commented on each others weight. It really was a fun thing to do actually and i looked forward to my class every week. You could always join the class too, (not that i'm suggesting you need to) but your mum might feel less that she was being made to go, and more like you were sharing some time together. Just one more thing, my dad has lost 7 stone since he went into a CH and hes the thinnest hes ever been in his life but the dietician is still telling me he should lose weight. I totally disagree, i know my dad better than anyone, and he has never looked physically better. There is no way i would put him on a diet no matter what they say. Only my own personal opinion of course, everybody's different. xx
 

Tender Face

Account Closed
Mar 14, 2006
5,379
0
NW England
Hi Rummer, can’t help at all on the diabetes front, but know too well the hiding of food – sadly sometimes only discovered by following a ‘nasty whiff’ appearing somewhere in mum’s house!!!!

Just one thought – can you ‘de-clutter’ wardrobes and drawers as far as possible so it’s less easy to ‘hide’ food? (Or easier for you to find it!) Tell mum you fancy having a spring –clean and make an ‘event’ of it ... perhaps storing things into ‘memory boxes’ to put away somewhere if she doesn’t like to part with anything! My mum used to hoard allsorts in the bottom of cupboards (old handbags – shoes from the 1970s etc) which made hidden packs of bacon or rancid cheese less easy to find quickly!

Hmmm. Food and ‘upstairs’ generally doesn’t go I guess – but I wonder another alternative might be for mum to have her own ‘store cupboard’ or mini-fridge in her room with suitable drinks and treats in that she can claim as purely ‘her own’????
Of course, neither suggestion may be appropriate or practical.

I am also mindful of the recent thread about ‘shop-lifting’ ..... and I do wonder some of the behaviour of ‘hiding food’ has nothing to do with appetite ..... and much as Lemony suggested – I think my mother’s ‘hoarding and hiding’ certainly was a throwback to days of shortages!!!!

Best wishes, Karen, x
 

Sue J

Registered User
Dec 9, 2009
8,032
0
Food

Hi Rummer,

Just a thought - if you did a pack lunch for your child and one for your Mum at the same time, under the pretence of trying to help control her diabetes she might see you're not starving her but providing for her. Of course you're not starving her but that's how she see's it - and maybe with less food in the house she worries that there won't be any when she wants it especially if it's a throwback to WW11 as someone mentioned. Perhaps leave the healthy stuff, fruit about as you can't really eat to much of that (well I know some could)- just some ideas maybe you've tried already.

I get immense, insatiable hunger and it is totally out of the ordinary for me - then I totally overeat usually all the wrong sugary things. Am trying at present to ensure that I have hot chocolate every night to aid sleep as I think sometimes it's the need for glucose that causes sleep problems. I try to to space my meals regularly, which I had not been doing as mind so erratic, but also allowing myself to have something extra if I need it. I'm hoping this might stabilize my eating and therefore hormone levels etc. rather than trying to fight it and not allow myself anything, but I do sometimes forget I've eaten, it is really frustrating. Perhaps if you included, if you did the packed lunch idea, some extra snacks saying one before pack lunch and one later in afternoon etc. it may remind her a) that you've done it with her and b) between you you've made provision for her needs especially the diabetic ones and c) it covers the fact that there is something there that she can have if she really feels she must have something. Is she able to go out to any day centres or activities at all? I find when I'm not able to do that my eating just gets worse.

Hope you find some ideas that work
Best wishes
Sue J
 
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Christin

Registered User
Jun 29, 2009
5,038
0
Somerset
Hello Rummer,

I am sorry that your mum is going through a stage of hiding food.

I just wanted to say that often my FIL will forget, and will ask for meals that he has already eaten. He seems to not recognise feelings of being full or hungry, only thinking he needs to eat. He too put on weight and we had to buy larger clothes, when I had expected the reverse.

This AS factsheet on unusual behaviour touches on hiding food and may be helpful to you.

http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=159

very best wishes to you all
 
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Jo1958

Registered User
Mar 31, 2010
3,724
0
Yorkshire
Rummer, hi
Some very good points already made, I'm sorry you are having to cope with this phase.
I have made a point of asking hubby to take ownership of the biscuit and crisp stores in our house, he likes arranging them carefully and keeping track of what is there, it has stopped him worrying about being hungry and I think he is eating less and certainly not hiding them around the house so much.
It is not an easy situation though especially with your mum's diabetes.
With best wishes from Jo
 

xanadu777

Registered User
Apr 2, 2011
40
0
Dyfed
My wife has been hiding things - including food - around the house and in the most ingenious places. My opinion for what it is worth is that my wife puts them in a safe place and then forgets exactly where. She has always been a 'tidy' individual and has to fulfill this need to have everything in its place. I eventually discover 'hidden' items but life does rather seem to be a hunt the thimble existence. Sorry I have no solutions to offer just a deep appreciation of the problems.
 

Splat88

Registered User
Jul 13, 2005
176
0
Essex
Over the years I have come to the conclusion that the hiding of food has more to do with the fear of having nothing to eat, since MIL can't remember when the last time she ate was, or when she gets her next meal. She has no sense of time now, not knowing if its time to get up or to go to bed.
I leave a small stash of food for her to "find", though in the main she eats it on her night time wandering forays. Like others have found, it seems to be sweet things like cake and biscuits, though I have been known to find tea bags in her drawers even though it's months since she tried to make herself a cup of tea.
I don't have the diabetes problem, though it took a very long time to come to the realisation that we had to eat at the same time or we'd be accused of not feeding her, even though she may have just finished her dinner. Solution for that is to leave her plate on her tray, though she sometimes insists its not hers.
We've recently had to try to discourage her from putting food in her room becuase we had a mice problem, they could always find a forgotten biscuit or cake in the wardrobe.
 

fulltimecarer

Registered User
Jan 14, 2011
5
0
hampshire
food

hi my only advice will be the same they gave me at the day centre give her what she wants, keep put to a routine, sit at the table with her and try to give her none spicy food. maybe reduce the amount of shopping and just shop for the day. there is an organization that delivers food to your door in my case i am a full time carer so i have control on what Mum eats.
it is important to make meal time as less stressful as possible. there is service as well for people to come at meal time and provided her with food.
Mum is temperamental too but i actualy gave up trying to make sense of things and just laugh even is there is nothing to laugh about.
have you try to visit the carers meeting in your area? their advice could help...
i hope my advice helps you a little and take easy even if is not easy at all...

Hi everyone

We are having issues with my mum( early on set), shes taken to taking food upstairs and hiding it, we are finding it in her draws/pockets etc, if we see her trying to take food up stairs and mention it we get a very argressive mum accusing us of starving her.

Second problem is related, she's often on her own during the day and I'll often come home to find whole loaf of bread have been eaten, blocks of cheese ( despite the fact she keeps telling me she doesn't like cheese!), have taken to buying crisps as I go and swaping my child to School dinners rather than try and keep to much food in the house!

Shes under the care of the Diabetic nurse as a diet controlled Diabetic, however had put on a stone in 6 months and I've been set the challenge of trying to get her to lose half a stone in 3 months ( after she flatly refused to go to weight watchers etc because they would just laugh at her).

If anyone has any tips or ideas on how to hand ether situation I'd be really greatful

thanks

x
 

sparrow10

Registered User
Apr 28, 2011
34
0
East Sussex
Hi,

Have no answers to this problem, but it does seem to be part of the illness. Mum "grazes" all day on fairly junk type food...crisps, sweets, biscuits etc, but when it comes to any main meals, she says she isn't hungry and just picks at the food. I order meals that are nutritionally balanced and just need microwaving, but she seems to have "taken against them" even though Hubby and I have tried them ourselves and find quite tasty. This means that any balanced meal with meat and vege, only the meat and potatoes (as long as they are chips or roasted) get eaten and the rest thrown away. Desert is always eaten and sometimes an ice cream on top. So I think food does become an issue whether it be over eating, under eating or all the wrong things, therefore not balanced. We haven't got to the hiding of food yet, but I do have to "de-clutter" the fridge weekly of out of date foods that haven't even been opened. Have even tried to buy foods that can be "grazed" and have good nutritional value, like yoghurts, tinned fish, bananas and other nice fruits, but I end up throwing it away and the sweets etc are smuggled in during our shopping trips and unless we have almost a confrontation (really not worth it) I have to just turn a blind eye.
Sorry this not really helping with the problem, but just to let you know this "food" problem is common in one way or another. I

Sparrow10
 

JennyA

Registered User
Oct 15, 2007
6
0
Cirencester
Problems with food

When my mother came to live with us because of her Alzheimer's and she was ill, food was a constant problem. As soon as I left the kitchen she would ransack the cupboards and drawers, looking for food. This was a worry as she was also diabetic. It was so bad that I even had to tape up the fridge if I went in the garden to hang washing out. We soon learned to put all sweet food and anything else she shouldn't eat, up on a top shelf so that she couldn't reach it, and only tins, packets etc on the lower shelves. I still can't leave any food out, she will eat anything she can see, and I even have to hide our fruit bowl or she would just eat the lot! She even took food off my baby grand-daughter! She has a good appetite and eats good meals, but just doesn't know when she is full. We took her out to a restaurant and she ate a huge plate of roast beef etc. When the waitress came to take orders for the sweets, she said she'd like the roast beef! So, my tip is to keep food out of sight and out of reach.
 

blackdoor

Registered User
Jan 3, 2011
6
0
I attend a diet club myself and one of the big tips they give us is to not buy junk food and sweets or keep them in the house. I know that's hard with kids but could you give them some pocket money each day to buy their own crisps on the way to school rather than keeping fattening snacks in the larder? Have a fruit bowl on the table with apples and satsumas so that at least sweet cravings are satisfied a little with healthy low calorie alternatives to sweets and biscuits?
Just a thought.
With love to you all
 

Jess26

Registered User
Jan 5, 2011
970
0
Kent
Hi,

Have no answers to this problem, but it does seem to be part of the illness. Mum "grazes" all day on fairly junk type food...crisps, sweets, biscuits etc, but when it comes to any main meals, she says she isn't hungry and just picks at the food. I order meals that are nutritionally balanced and just need microwaving, but she seems to have "taken against them" even though Hubby and I have tried them ourselves and find quite tasty. This means that any balanced meal with meat and vege, only the meat and potatoes (as long as they are chips or roasted) get eaten and the rest thrown away. Desert is always eaten and sometimes an ice cream on top. So I think food does become an issue whether it be over eating, under eating or all the wrong things, therefore not balanced. We haven't got to the hiding of food yet, but I do have to "de-clutter" the fridge weekly of out of date foods that haven't even been opened. Have even tried to buy foods that can be "grazed" and have good nutritional value, like yoghurts, tinned fish, bananas and other nice fruits, but I end up throwing it away and the sweets etc are smuggled in during our shopping trips and unless we have almost a confrontation (really not worth it) I have to just turn a blind eye.
Sorry this not really helping with the problem, but just to let you know this "food" problem is common in one way or another. I

Sparrow10

this is my mum exactly, day centre voiced their concerns to my brother a couple of weeks ago about the amount of weight sh'ed lost. Food is the biggest hassle for us at the moment
 

rosaliesal

Registered User
Nov 15, 2009
67
0
Food and how to watch out

Idiscovered early on that I should always check draws etc. in mum's room. I avoid the sweets area in the supermarket and use distraction tactics to get her from noticing these things. I do buy her from time to time some treats so she is not deprived. I no longer mention there is a pudding because I know she will not eat the first course. I have taken charge of what she eats and give her what she likes not what we eat, which makes more work for me but keeps mum happy. When she mentions wanting something sweet I will often say...later, I will get some for you later. This defuses the situation. I think about when she might be hungry and when drinks are necessary and do not offer big drinks when I anticipate she may be near to eating. In other words, its the same as looking after a child. It is all about you not the person with Alzheimers being in control for all the best reasons. If you leave someone to their own devices they will not be able to think constructively or even correctly because of the illness so it is natural that the wrong balance of food gets eaten. I lay out the breakfast things and if mum does not eat anything I will offer something a little later and so on until the end of the day. Do not sit waiting for the person concerned to speak up....they will often not be aware of how hungry or thirsty they are. It is all up to you and once you get a routine it becomes natural for all.:)