My mom has changed personality, I hardly know her, she has become reclusive and racist. She hardly eats and is losing loads of weight. She will not accept any help off anybody but me or my husband, but doesnt seem to like me anymore. Is this normal with dementia? I am finding it frightening.
personality
- Thread starter tillykate
- Start date
Dear Tilly Kate, I'm so sorry that you are finding the changes in your mum's behaviour worrying.
Not everyone experiences dementia in the same way, but the changes you describe will indeed be recognised by lots of carers and relatives. There is an AS factsheet which may help you http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=159
Is your mother in reasonable health? Sometimes a urinary tract infection can trigger aggression, confusion and unusual behaviour so it might be an idea to get your mum's urine tested so that she can be started on antibiotics. Maybe contact her GP tomorrow to ask for this?
Not everyone experiences dementia in the same way, but the changes you describe will indeed be recognised by lots of carers and relatives. There is an AS factsheet which may help you http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=159
Is your mother in reasonable health? Sometimes a urinary tract infection can trigger aggression, confusion and unusual behaviour so it might be an idea to get your mum's urine tested so that she can be started on antibiotics. Maybe contact her GP tomorrow to ask for this?
Hi Thanks for your help. She has had a urine infection several times but is living with me at the moment and I can keep her drinking.
Since posting, I have been reading this site more and I see I am not alone!
I think I am going to find this site a god send
Thank you everybody
Since posting, I have been reading this site more and I see I am not alone!
I think I am going to find this site a god send
Thank you everybody
Dear Tillykate
Sadly, and as hard as it is on you and your husband, it isn't unusual. Checking for UTI is always a good idea and you're right that hydration is key often in mood swings. In my experience, it depends where your Mum is on the progression of the disease. In what I would call the mid-phase, my Mum was hostile, complaining and quite difficult. Sun shined out of the proverbial backside of my brother who barely shows an interest! But now Mum is in a much more advanced state of vascular dementia - she can still feed herself, walk with assistance though her speech is very mixed and jumbled. But she recognises those of us who are close and I can see that she is very happy most of the times. There are off days - and when I wash her, I get biffed quite a bit and she can get very cross, obviously aware that it is complete insubordination on my part to clean and cream parts that I shouldn't even know about - but once the ordeal is over, she is happy. I know that I am extraordinarily lucky. There are many members whose experience is far different. Only to say that the aggression can pass and soften. I would even go so far as to say that my relationship with Mum has improved since she contracted dementia, in that I am full of admiration and love at her indomitable spirit, her refusal to give in. Hang on in there if you can but don't be shy about asking for help if it is becoming oppressive and unbearable for you. You know that as your Mum, she would not want you to suffer were she able to behave as she would choose to do.
Sadly, and as hard as it is on you and your husband, it isn't unusual. Checking for UTI is always a good idea and you're right that hydration is key often in mood swings. In my experience, it depends where your Mum is on the progression of the disease. In what I would call the mid-phase, my Mum was hostile, complaining and quite difficult. Sun shined out of the proverbial backside of my brother who barely shows an interest! But now Mum is in a much more advanced state of vascular dementia - she can still feed herself, walk with assistance though her speech is very mixed and jumbled. But she recognises those of us who are close and I can see that she is very happy most of the times. There are off days - and when I wash her, I get biffed quite a bit and she can get very cross, obviously aware that it is complete insubordination on my part to clean and cream parts that I shouldn't even know about - but once the ordeal is over, she is happy. I know that I am extraordinarily lucky. There are many members whose experience is far different. Only to say that the aggression can pass and soften. I would even go so far as to say that my relationship with Mum has improved since she contracted dementia, in that I am full of admiration and love at her indomitable spirit, her refusal to give in. Hang on in there if you can but don't be shy about asking for help if it is becoming oppressive and unbearable for you. You know that as your Mum, she would not want you to suffer were she able to behave as she would choose to do.
hello
i am sally rogers and i had a a water infection my carer :was going mad so did i but it makes alz suffers memory ten times worse sally rogers
i am sally rogers and i had a a water infection my carer :was going mad so did i but it makes alz suffers memory ten times worse sally rogers
