Could anyone offer any useful advice about respite care please. Next year my husband and I would love to take a weeks holiday and place my Mum who lives with us into respite care. I haven't spoken to anyone about this at all yet, I should love any helpful advice about who I should contact first and any of the pitfalls some of you may have come across. Mum has savings so any info on what approx expected charges we would be looking at would be of great help.Thank you.
Respite advice needed please
- Thread starter RosmaryW
- Start date
First I advise that you visit care homes so that you can get an idea of the ones you like, it is a good idea to do this in advance as some get booked up, some don't even offer respite and it has been hard for us to find a good place that does.
We have found one that charges £600 a week, it is the nicest one. The worst charged £850 a week. Doesnt seem to add up, but there we are.
If you look at the fact sheets and websites about choosing a care home this will also be helpful as it will tell you what to look for and ask about.
Good luck, they vary a lot. We have had absolutely no help, only the most demoralising remarks made by the CPN and carer support, you could ask them for advice but quite honestly I wouldnt bother,
good luck
We have found one that charges £600 a week, it is the nicest one. The worst charged £850 a week. Doesnt seem to add up, but there we are.
If you look at the fact sheets and websites about choosing a care home this will also be helpful as it will tell you what to look for and ask about.
Good luck, they vary a lot. We have had absolutely no help, only the most demoralising remarks made by the CPN and carer support, you could ask them for advice but quite honestly I wouldnt bother,
good luck
By the way you just ring the care homes and set up visits for yourself, find them on the internet, there are sometimes star ratings which i did not find very helpful or accurate.
People say you should visit unannounced but I think that is plain rude, as this is the home for the elderly people within, not a drop in centre.
People say you should visit unannounced but I think that is plain rude, as this is the home for the elderly people within, not a drop in centre.
If you have a good CPN or Social Worker it may be worthwhile to discuss which Care Homes keep beds purely for respite.
When I was at that stage with my husband, I went along to my chosen Home. The Manager was excellent but clearly explained that if, at the last moment, the allocated bed was needed for long term care, then they would be given priority. Not much good to me if I planned a break.
Some PCTs have Assessment Units where some beds are kept for rolling respite - may be worth your while making enquiries - again your CPN or SW should know. Otherwise pester your Mum's GP.
When I was at that stage with my husband, I went along to my chosen Home. The Manager was excellent but clearly explained that if, at the last moment, the allocated bed was needed for long term care, then they would be given priority. Not much good to me if I planned a break.
Some PCTs have Assessment Units where some beds are kept for rolling respite - may be worth your while making enquiries - again your CPN or SW should know. Otherwise pester your Mum's GP.
Hi Rosemary,
I would suggest taking a look at the Alzheimer's Society's factsheet on respite care:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/462
That factsheet suggests that respite can be one of the services requested as part of a Community Care assessment through Social Services:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/418
Take care,
I would suggest taking a look at the Alzheimer's Society's factsheet on respite care:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/462
That factsheet suggests that respite can be one of the services requested as part of a Community Care assessment through Social Services:
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/418
Take care,
Go for it!
I got respite care for my Mum in the summer so I could have my first break in 5 years. I emailed 3 homes from a selection we'd visited last year, was pleased to find this was a much easier process than I'd expected. 2 of them were able to offer dates I required because they try and keep room for respite stays, so see if you can find some homes that do the same. Having established availability and pencilled in provisional dates, I then contacted Social Services. It wasn't difficult to get a financial assessment. The cost of the home was £650pw and Soc.Services agreed to pay around £370pw of that, for 4 weeks. The rest was made up of £100pw from Mum's pension and I shared the cost of "3rd-party" top-up with my siblings.
Regarding savings, my Mum had about £17k but did not have to use any of this because when they do an assessment they only counted the notional 'income' from her savings, not the capital amount itself.
You are ENTITLED to get respite care, so go for it And be firm - it's ultimately in the state's interest to let carers have a break now and then! If you're not sure how to contact Soc.Services, check out your local council's website. Good luck.
I got respite care for my Mum in the summer so I could have my first break in 5 years. I emailed 3 homes from a selection we'd visited last year, was pleased to find this was a much easier process than I'd expected. 2 of them were able to offer dates I required because they try and keep room for respite stays, so see if you can find some homes that do the same. Having established availability and pencilled in provisional dates, I then contacted Social Services. It wasn't difficult to get a financial assessment. The cost of the home was £650pw and Soc.Services agreed to pay around £370pw of that, for 4 weeks. The rest was made up of £100pw from Mum's pension and I shared the cost of "3rd-party" top-up with my siblings.
Regarding savings, my Mum had about £17k but did not have to use any of this because when they do an assessment they only counted the notional 'income' from her savings, not the capital amount itself.
You are ENTITLED to get respite care, so go for it And be firm - it's ultimately in the state's interest to let carers have a break now and then! If you're not sure how to contact Soc.Services, check out your local council's website. Good luck.
PS: Mum's stay in the home was so successful that she has decided to become a resident there - but that's another story 
Rosemary, I am using respite for mum for the first time in November and I would say go to the Care Home unannounced and ask to see round for if they don't let you then they have something to hide.
Mums social worker told me that everyone no matter their circumstance pays £ 158.20 . I also know she is entitled to 6 weeks every year.
I am lucky as I work in domi physiotherapy and I go to homes to replace parts on walking frames and I g et to see the good, bad and ugly ones but I chosen the one that it the least fancy and the most homely.
I am worried but I know it has to go ahead for everyone to keep going and assist mum in her independence. Xxxxx
Mums social worker told me that everyone no matter their circumstance pays £ 158.20 . I also know she is entitled to 6 weeks every year.
I am lucky as I work in domi physiotherapy and I go to homes to replace parts on walking frames and I g et to see the good, bad and ugly ones but I chosen the one that it the least fancy and the most homely.
I am worried but I know it has to go ahead for everyone to keep going and assist mum in her independence. Xxxxx
Hi, well I do have some experience here
First I would say make sure that you choose the right place, and don't just follow someone else's suggestions. The first place we used was totally wrong, we discovered afterwards that they had no dementia care! This was because we kept being told that all FIL's symptons were just old age, and we knew this wasn't right. We should have followed our own instincts!
Some counties fund respite, some don't. Even when they say they do, they won't always fund a home if they don't agree its the right one!
Once you have found the right place, and you do get a feel for this, be positive and stay calm. Your feelings will reflect on your mum and if you are very anxious so will she be.
We gave the care home a very detailed report on FIL's normal daily routine and listed his dislikes etc, including what time he likes to get up, how he reacts on rainy days etc. The staff should then be prepared and can watch out for any triggers and avoid them. We also sent favourite foods in case he didn't eat what was provided, but these were not necessary We also gave him a sort of calendar with a count down to coming home and the staff used this daily to reassure him.
I had reached the point previously where we thought we would never have good respite but this last time we did! But, for your own satisfaction, you do need to be sure youself that you have done all you can.
Good luck x
First I would say make sure that you choose the right place, and don't just follow someone else's suggestions. The first place we used was totally wrong, we discovered afterwards that they had no dementia care! This was because we kept being told that all FIL's symptons were just old age, and we knew this wasn't right. We should have followed our own instincts!
Some counties fund respite, some don't. Even when they say they do, they won't always fund a home if they don't agree its the right one!
Once you have found the right place, and you do get a feel for this, be positive and stay calm. Your feelings will reflect on your mum and if you are very anxious so will she be.
We gave the care home a very detailed report on FIL's normal daily routine and listed his dislikes etc, including what time he likes to get up, how he reacts on rainy days etc. The staff should then be prepared and can watch out for any triggers and avoid them. We also sent favourite foods in case he didn't eat what was provided, but these were not necessary
We also gave him a sort of calendar with a count down to coming home and the staff used this daily to reassure him. I had reached the point previously where we thought we would never have good respite but this last time we did! But, for your own satisfaction, you do need to be sure youself that you have done all you can.
Good luck x
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