What would you do ?

[Clive]

The only thing I would add to what everyone has already said is that if this was me I would tell the Respite Home that I was away from say three days before my actual departure day…. And I would not visit the Respite Home.

There is nothing worse than being rung up 3 or 4 hours before departure to be asked to make some relatively unimportant decision that the Respite Home would have made without any concern if you had actually been away.

Have a good holiday

Clive

 

[Fenners]

Update on respite

Hi everyone,

Well thanks to all your good advice I have done it.... respite is now booked from 18th August, 6 days before we fly to Spain, giving me the chance to wind down(if i can) get all the hysterics out of the way, because i know for sure that there will be some (on my part definitely ) pack the cases, get hysterical again, feel dreadful and so very very guilty..... then with all that out of the way I should be more than ready on the 24th to get on that plane (i hate flying though !) and leave it all behind and just look forward to 2 weeks peace and to enjoy quality time with my family.

I think that come the beginning of next week you could possibly be bombarded with threads from me as I am still very very apprehensive as yes Lin this is the first time we have taken respite, even though i know its the right thing to do I am sure I will go to pieces and need all my TP family. I apologise in advance.

Mums extremely confused again today and has packed a carrier bag, got her shoes and coat, tried to get the cat into a box to take "home" bless her, it breaks my heart, bet come the 18th she will refuse to budge !!! as she has an appointment with neurologist on the 17th, we are going to tell her that he has suggested she has a nice rest in a lovely place where they can monitor her medication .... she would point blank refuse to be put in "one of those homes" (her words). CPN thinks this is a good idea - hope so.

Thank you all so much for everything. xxxxxxxxx

 

[Clive]

When I was young people used to say they were going to a Convalescent Home for a bit of rest, and to recuperate when they were run down.

Clive

 

[scared daughter]

I'm voting YES too, you need the break and your mum will have longer to settle. We noticed with my mum when we popped in she was less settled but on leaving we were talking tot he nurse (recent emergency restbite unplanned so i could go away and then have tests done) that my mum settles when I left the room.

It felt and this is not meant to offend but it felt a wee bit like when my children were at nursery - hard to do and worrying and they seemed unsettled BUT once you are away often the person who you think is unsettled isnt.

Hope it works out for you all xxxx

 

[Izzy]

Well done girl!

 

[Skye]

Well done, Fenners! It's not an easy decision, but you need the break.

I'll eco Clive. Don't visit for the week you're at home. Your mum would be upset, and so would you. If you can manage it, don't even phone -- though any home worth its salt would tell you your mum, settled fine! They'll ring you soon enough if there's a real problem.

Relax, unwind, enjoy some retail therapy -- and enjoy that holiday.

XXXX

 

[Grannie G]

Well done Fenners.

My husband went into respite care for the first time in January and I was as anxious as you are. He was absolutely fine.

Please don`t waste your holiday fretting. Your mother will be in good hands with people trained to care for her. Your family need some quality time together and Spain calls.