Hi everyone,
Our family is in a crisis situation at the moment and I don't know where to start. It will help me if I write down some of the details in a 'diary of events' format.
* Mum has been deteriorating quite rapidly over the last 1-2 mths.
* Until recently still being cared for at home by my dad and family.
* Mum has had 5 falls in the last month, last one she had some lacerations and bruising.
* Most recent fall on 4th July, resulted on admission to A & E, experience there was pretty horrendous, staff just did not know how to communicate with her, despite being told many times she has advanced dementia and will not understand all of your questions.
* They diagnosed a chest infection and UTI, also said she had arhythmias. When we were there, one of the support workers tutted when we asked for help getting mum onto a commode.
Mum went through all of the routine assessments, she was very traumatised.
They wanted to admit her to medical assessment, my sister and I said we felt this would not be best for mum, as we were so afraid she would be neglected and either try to get out of bed and fall, or meet with staff that have no clue regarding care and communication with a dementia patient.
* We brought her home, with antibiotics and a plan for rapid response to call every day to check her vital signs etc.
* Mum was unwell and we continued to care for her. On day 4, rapid response concerned, mum was clammy to touch, BP high, temp high, tachycardic. GP called. (mum had been on antibiotics 4 days at this stage) He was concerned, decided to prescribe a stronger antibiotic - continue to monitor.
* Rapid response contacted our mental health team, said family in crisis - something has to happen - now.
Consultant reluctantly agree to admit mum to local acute assessment mental health unit.
* Mum was admitted, we had to insist the bed was not suitable as she may try and climb off, and fall. The bed had rails, but policy is not to use them. They changed bed to a low bed, with mattress on floor in case she rolled off.
* I felt relief, that we were finally getting some help - until the next day.
* Went to visit at 4pm. 3 staff on duty, 1 trained, 2 support workers. Mum was on a 72hr assessment, including 15 min obs, fluid charts etc.
* I asked staff if they were aware mum on 15min obs, they said no.
Asked trained nurse how mum's vital signs were, she went off to find her chart. Came back and said it appears the last nurse has taken chart home by mistake. So, obvious her signs had not been checked. (her pulse was 130 on admission)
* Then went to ask staff to help me get mum to toilet, I had an encounter with male support worker which resulted in an altecation between us! He would not let me stay in room while mum ws put on commode, his manner, attitude and communication were diabolical.
* They were supposedly mental health staff, but had no time or patience with my mum, and no understanding of a dementia patients needs.
* 2 days later, received a call from hospital doc, mum too physically unwell, transferring to A&E.
* By now mums condition is discovered to be critical, vital signs all over place, blood sugars rocketed, chest infection may be pnumonia.
* Another round of physical interventions, then transferred to ICU.
Mum has suffered so much.
* Now on life support, pulse rate went to 180, rapid intervention to prevent cardiac arrest.
Doctors discussed our wishes re CPR - we decide no.
* Family by mums side all night, she is suffering - over next 24 hours, vital signs becoming stable. Next day (yesterday) transferred to medical assessment. They are already thinking of transfer back to mental health unit.
* I feel so guilty, I was ready to let mum go 2 nights ago. I don't think I wanted her to recover!!!!!! How can a daughter want her mum to die?
I feel ill, and dont believe any of the staff realise we have to be involved, we have to speak for my mum, because she cannot.
Visiting where she is today is only 2pm - 8pm, so I have to wait before I can go see her.
Thank you for reading - I don't know who to turn to.
Our family is in a crisis situation at the moment and I don't know where to start. It will help me if I write down some of the details in a 'diary of events' format.
* Mum has been deteriorating quite rapidly over the last 1-2 mths.
* Until recently still being cared for at home by my dad and family.
* Mum has had 5 falls in the last month, last one she had some lacerations and bruising.
* Most recent fall on 4th July, resulted on admission to A & E, experience there was pretty horrendous, staff just did not know how to communicate with her, despite being told many times she has advanced dementia and will not understand all of your questions.
* They diagnosed a chest infection and UTI, also said she had arhythmias. When we were there, one of the support workers tutted when we asked for help getting mum onto a commode.
Mum went through all of the routine assessments, she was very traumatised.
They wanted to admit her to medical assessment, my sister and I said we felt this would not be best for mum, as we were so afraid she would be neglected and either try to get out of bed and fall, or meet with staff that have no clue regarding care and communication with a dementia patient.
* We brought her home, with antibiotics and a plan for rapid response to call every day to check her vital signs etc.
* Mum was unwell and we continued to care for her. On day 4, rapid response concerned, mum was clammy to touch, BP high, temp high, tachycardic. GP called. (mum had been on antibiotics 4 days at this stage) He was concerned, decided to prescribe a stronger antibiotic - continue to monitor.
* Rapid response contacted our mental health team, said family in crisis - something has to happen - now.
Consultant reluctantly agree to admit mum to local acute assessment mental health unit.
* Mum was admitted, we had to insist the bed was not suitable as she may try and climb off, and fall. The bed had rails, but policy is not to use them. They changed bed to a low bed, with mattress on floor in case she rolled off.
* I felt relief, that we were finally getting some help - until the next day.
* Went to visit at 4pm. 3 staff on duty, 1 trained, 2 support workers. Mum was on a 72hr assessment, including 15 min obs, fluid charts etc.
* I asked staff if they were aware mum on 15min obs, they said no.
Asked trained nurse how mum's vital signs were, she went off to find her chart. Came back and said it appears the last nurse has taken chart home by mistake. So, obvious her signs had not been checked. (her pulse was 130 on admission)
* Then went to ask staff to help me get mum to toilet, I had an encounter with male support worker which resulted in an altecation between us! He would not let me stay in room while mum ws put on commode, his manner, attitude and communication were diabolical.
* They were supposedly mental health staff, but had no time or patience with my mum, and no understanding of a dementia patients needs.
* 2 days later, received a call from hospital doc, mum too physically unwell, transferring to A&E.
* By now mums condition is discovered to be critical, vital signs all over place, blood sugars rocketed, chest infection may be pnumonia.
* Another round of physical interventions, then transferred to ICU.
Mum has suffered so much.
* Now on life support, pulse rate went to 180, rapid intervention to prevent cardiac arrest.
Doctors discussed our wishes re CPR - we decide no.
* Family by mums side all night, she is suffering - over next 24 hours, vital signs becoming stable. Next day (yesterday) transferred to medical assessment. They are already thinking of transfer back to mental health unit.
* I feel so guilty, I was ready to let mum go 2 nights ago. I don't think I wanted her to recover!!!!!! How can a daughter want her mum to die?
I feel ill, and dont believe any of the staff realise we have to be involved, we have to speak for my mum, because she cannot.
Visiting where she is today is only 2pm - 8pm, so I have to wait before I can go see her.
Thank you for reading - I don't know who to turn to.
