I am at breakdown today

[heartbroken]

I have just popped on to see how you are Helen
I'm pleased you are feeling better but its sad alan is ill I hope the gp comes to make him better
take care of yourself xxxx

 

[lesmisralbles]

Please do not leave calling the Doctor untill tomorrow

Come on, I hope all will be OK for you both.
Barb XX

 

[Margaret W]

Dear Helen,

Forgive me. I am a slut. But did you need to clean? It is nice to share chores, but if it doesn't work perhaps just dont clean. I mean, ask yourself what needs cleaning. Toilets yes, baths and sinks, kitchen worktops - and the telephone handset. Anything else doesn't really matter does it? Carpets don't really need hoovering, unless you have animals around, windows can do remarkably well if the sun doesn't shine on them too often (close the curtains!), and dust doesn't do any harm unless there is someone with asthma.

Relax, is my advice. But I am not in your shoes.

Margaret

 

[janlyn]

morning

hi helen im sorry to hear alan is poorly i do hope your gp will be able to see him and that you are feeling ok , i am back to work today so am able to have the lap top before my daughter needs it so will check in when i can to see how you and alan are, love and support to you both x

 

[Izzy]

Hi Helen. Hope you get help for Alan today. Izzy x

 

[gigi]

Morning Helen,

Hope you managed some sleep last night. How is Alan thismorning?
It's a worry that he's becoming so breathless, I hope the GP can see him quickly today.

Thinking about you.

Love xx

 

[maryw]

Hope all goes well. My mother used to become breathless on lots of antibiotics, it became a problem which to prescribe. Hope you get good support today. x

 

[Grannie G]

I hope you get through to the GP Helen. Mine is still engaged.

 

[Helen33]

Brilliant News

I am waiting for the GP to ring me.

I rang and spoke to the care home Manager. I didn't expect her to remember either me or Alan but she did. She thought he was incredible and could see that with the right stimuli Alan was able to function very well.

I told her of our situation. I told her I had been breaking down and that Alan was ill. I said that once Alan's illness was sorted that I felt I needed to review my whole situation and that I was thinking of respite with Alan having the use of the Crossroads sitters. She said that she had no objection whatsoever and that she would do anything possible to accommodate both our needs. I said the weekly routine we have with them needed reviewing and she just was so kind and said that they would accommodate whatever it was that was needed. We are going to meet up to have a heart to heart and a thorough review. I told her that I'd rung up in a state a few nights ago and that whoever it was that I spoke to was wonderful and that it helped. She was pleased about that and said that they were available 24 hours a day.

The sitter has arrived and I told her I needed some peace and space and she is sitting with Alan in the sun room and all is well.

Thank you for all your good wishes

 

[Izzy]

How wonderful for you. You must feel so relieved. Izzy

 

[DeborahBlythe]

So glad to read about the positive response from the Care Home Manager.I hope you and Alan both enjoy your day today. x

 

[Winnie Kjaer]

Hello Helen, sounds excellent, hope the doctor visits Alan today so you can get that sorted too. My thoughts are with you

 

[Helen33]

You must feel so relieved. Izzy

Oh I do feel such relief and I am always surprised. I think I get into such a panic because I don't expect much. I keep reading about the failure of the services and I think it has a bigger effect on me than I realise. Every time our situation changes I think the services can't possibly meet our needs and I panic and get frightened as to what this will mean to our lives. Up to now I think the services that have been provided for us are excellent and I hope that I can remember that next time something changes. I don't think we would automatically be offered these things but when they are informed of things needed to manage the condition Alan has (and anyone meeting him can see that it works) then they are willing to pull out all the stops to keep this going for as long as possible.

Love

 

[Norrms]

Hiya

Hiya Helen, so glad you are satisfied with the sevice you have recieved. yes we do hear such a lot of awful things these days and it does make you wonder, but good to know its not always like that, regards to Alan as well, best wishes, Norrms and family xxxxxx

 

[gigi]

Well done, Helen

What brilliant news indeed!

I hope Alan is ok...and that the GP visits soon.

Love xx

 

[Grannie G]

Oh Helen I can imagine the weight that has been lifted off your shoulders. Just to know someone is with you 100% and is putting no `ifs` or `buts` in your way but pepared to support you wholeheartedly is such a comfort.
You are no longer alone.

 

[BeckyJan]

Very pleased to hear this news, Helen. I hope the GP is as helpful as the Care Home Manager. You sound so much better yourself too .
Love Jan

 

[Helen33]

The GP news

The GP has just phoned. Before she rang she chased up the results of the Xray and it shows substantial infection on the lung and he needs to be referred to the respiratory people at the hospital. HOWEVER, the GP wants to see him today to give him a thorough medical review because he may need admitting to the hospital today. I said I would take him to the surgery at 1.15 today because they have all the facilities there.

Alan looks very pale today and for the first time he looks anaemic.

Love

 

[larivy]

so pleased for you helen hope it all goes well with the Gp love larivy

 

[Lynne]

So pleased that your GP has responded so well - I imagine you will have already packed an overnight bag for Alan in case she wants him to be admitted immediately?

I rang and spoke to the care home Manager. I didn't expect her to remember either me or Alan but she did. She thought he was incredible and could see that with the right stimuli Alan was able to function very well.

I told her of our situation. I told her I had been breaking down and that Alan was ill. I said that once Alan's illness was sorted that I felt I needed to review my whole situation and that I was thinking of respite with Alan having the use of the Crossroads sitters. She said that she had no objection whatsoever and that she would do anything possible to accommodate both our needs. I said the weekly routine we have with them needed reviewing and she just was so kind and said that they would accommodate whatever it was that was needed. We are going to meet up to have a heart to heart and a thorough review. I told her that I'd rung up in a state a few nights ago and that whoever it was that I spoke to was wonderful and that it helped. She was pleased about that and said that they were available 24 hours a day.

My stars & tootsies, there ARE still fairy godmothers!! Helen, I'm so SO glad someone has come up trumps for you, and is willing to work with you on what you & Alan need.

Now Please, do NOT get an attack of the 'guilts' if presented with a chance for a break A.S.A.P.
If you have a breakdown under the strain (& you have been very close recently) then BOTH of you are sunk.

Accept whatever help is offered for BOTH OF YOU; do not let the Guilt-monster, your pride, your ego or any other reason derail an opportunity.
(I hope you know me well enough by now to take this as it's meant, not as it {perhaps} sounds!)

When the immediate pressures are relieved, you will be able to think more clearly about how best to marshal & rearrange the available help to proceed for the future.
There's little chance you will 'forget' how awful things have been lately, but you have only to read this thread back to yourself!

Lots of Love