help

[rio_stokes]

We've just had to have my mum's dog put down and she is distraught I don't know what to do for the best. The dog went everywhere with her and it was helping her to keep active. I'm so confused as to what to do as she has been talking about getting another dog already but i'm not sure if its too soon or if its even the right thing to do. Basically what I want advice on is :

Should we get a new dog?
How long do we wait?
What sort of dog is best?

 

[librarygirl]

So sorry to hear about the dog. Basically, is your Mum capable of looking after a dog full time? It's quite a responsibility, I know - I have one and work full time so I have people come and see her for me during the day and take her out. Having said that, dogs are great company and very therapeutic. Just have to remember their needs as well. Maybe an older dog that needs a home?

 

[Vonny]

Hi Rio,

Firstly, I'm really sorry about your mum's dog. I know some people think of them as just pets but to me they are more than that, they are part of the family and incredibly therapeutic for ill people.

Secondly, and this is going to sound very pessimistic, are you able to take on a new dog if your mum is no longer around for whatever reason, going into a home, becoming too ill etc. Since a dog can last a long time (I met one in the vets a couple of weeks ago and he was 16!) I think you have to look at the longer term as well as the situation right now.

I'd also get a steer from your mum as well on whether or not to get another for her, and what breed. It doesn't have to be direct questioning, just skirting around it may come up with some ideas for you.

All the best, and I hope she does want another one, but then I have 2 dogs so I'm probably I'm biased

Vonny xx

 

[rio_stokes]

Thank you both very much, your words have helped give me more perspective.
This outcome wasn't wholly unexpected as the dog (Binky) was coming up to 13 so she lived to a fair age so it is something we have discussed in passing but obviously now it is an actual issue.
My partner and I have offered that if needs be we could take in any dog if needs be so my main concern is if it would actually be of any benefit to my mum.

 

[Helen33]

Hello RioStokes

I was wondering whether you feel your mum would be able to get used to a dog which might have different needs and a different personality? Our last two dogs were completely different characters and the latter would have tested anyone to the limit as she needed a lot of training.

I think it might be important to do a lot of research into finding a dog that is quite similar to the one she has lost to avoid confusion.

Our dog died 2 years ago at Christmas and my husband, who has had dogs all his life, didn't want another but he has taken very well to stuffed toy dogs

Love and best wishes

 

[rio_stokes]

Thank you for your reply, that is a very good point, binky was a staffy who slept pretty much all the time and required basically no care except love and cuddles, does anyone have any ideas on breeds with this same temprement?

 

[alfjess]

Hi Rio Stokes

Every dog has it's own personality, doesn't matter what breed.
If you feel your Mum really needs another dog, go for an elderly one, who may sleep all the time, but remember, your Mum isn't going to get any better. Sorry, and who will have the dog then?

Good luck
Alfjess

 

[nellbelles]

Maybe a rescue dog (who's owner has past on) I'm sure it would be possible to find an elderly dog that is also in need of companionship, and sleep, not exercise and training

 

[sussexsue]

If you are planning on getting another dog do it now. The emptiness left when an animal dies is overwhelming. OK a new dog wont be the same, but it will be something. A lot of people with AD are very tactile and I believe stroking an animal brings them a lot of happiness and contentment, and lets face it with AD happiness is the one positive thing we can try and give to them.

Agree a rescue dog is your best bet, especially an older dog. However a lot of rescue centres will certainly refuse to give you one because of your mum's AD, although some of the smaller charities can be more understanding.

As others have said though, this will only work if you are 100% committed to take on the long term responsibility of the dog.

 

[rio_stokes]

Thank you all for your advice.

I have weighed up many pros and cons to getting a new dog, my mum does live with my dad who is able to take care of another dog and would like to have 1 we just want to know if it would be beneficial. Also my partner and I have said we are more than willing to take on any dog they get if the responsibility becomes too much.

All I need to know now is how beneficial other carers have found having a dog in the house?

 

[Vonny]

Well despite my mum being bed-bound and unable to talk, my dogs clearly made her day as her eyes would light up whenever she saw them. I couldn't let the labrador too near her because he was a pup and loved chewing (still does, as my dining table and chairs can testify!) but the stout middle aged border terrier could be left to snooze in peace with her on her bed and she would attempt to stroke her with her good hand.

So in my opinion, it was beneficial.

Vx

 

[librarygirl]

I take my lovely greyhound Molly into the home to see Mum. They all love stroking her, and one old lady who could not string two words together, and was always just whimpering, suddenly said out of the blue to Molly, Do you want a bacon sandwich? It was quite amazing. I'm sure it has a calming and benficial effect on poorly people.

 

[sussexsue]

My mum is useless with our dog (border collie pup), but she absolutely adores her and likewise the pup adores mum. We have to supervise closely as she tends to do everything you shouldnt do with a puppy.

However the pup will lie placidly for ages whilst mum gently strokes her and talks to her. Seeing the two of them together is wonderful and the look on mum's face says it all.

Have you considered a greyhound or lurcher as they can make wonderful pets and are often very gentle.

 

[rio_stokes]

Thank you all so much you have definately helped me make up my mind. The way I see it now is if it will help my mum then I will do it as I want what is best for her.

I will discuss the lurcher or greyhound idea with my dad thank you Sue x

Thank you all again x

 

[Stewart]

Sorry to be a bit late on this one.

Last year we bought a miniature schnauzer puppy, primarily for my wife, who is now in the moderate stage of AD. The benefits are enormous. I cannot spend as much time with my wife as I would like and the dog is a constant source of comfort and activity for her.

I investigated rescue dogs but, not having owned dogs before, we were worried about getting a dog with behavioural problems and the difficulties that could cause.

The only drawback is that Alfie is my total responsibility. My wife cannot handle any of the tasks involved in dog ownership, she can’t measure out his food or comb his coat. (never mind go to dog training classes!)

Overall a dog has opened up a wonderful new aspect to my wife’s life and the extra work for me has been totally worthwhile.

Best of luck

Stewart

 

[rio_stokes]

thank you so much for your reply it has helped out a great deal x