My beautiful mum has gone
- Thread starter Kate P
- Start date
Dear Kate
So very sorry to hear about your Mum.
As for the funeral. Do what you feel is right for your Mum.
And take care of yourself
Alfjess
So very sorry to hear about your Mum.
As for the funeral. Do what you feel is right for your Mum.
And take care of yourself
Alfjess
Dear Kate,
My sympathies to you and your family.
May I say that your funeral arrangements sound perfect? For my dad, we had a wake in Guatemala and I had the song "Don't Worry, Be Happy" played because it summed my father up so well. At the more formal funeral in Canada, my sister and I picked "My Way" because Dad always did do it his way.
So I think what you are planning sounds wonderful. Do exactly what you want and I think you'll find people will respond really well.
Love,
My sympathies to you and your family.
May I say that your funeral arrangements sound perfect? For my dad, we had a wake in Guatemala and I had the song "Don't Worry, Be Happy" played because it summed my father up so well. At the more formal funeral in Canada, my sister and I picked "My Way" because Dad always did do it his way.
So I think what you are planning sounds wonderful. Do exactly what you want and I think you'll find people will respond really well.
Love,
Kate,
I am so sorry to hear about your mum. Please accept my sympathies.
As for the funeral, if people want to raise their eyebrows, let them get on with it and do whatever you feel is right for your mum.
One of the hardest parts of a funeral, I think, is the walking into a church full of people. At the funeral of the father of a friend of mine, the family (including dad) arrived at the church first and met all the mourners at the door. A brave thing for them to do, but it felt right for them. Their father had been a vicar himself, so perhaps he had got the idea from one of his parishoners.
I am so sorry to hear about your mum. Please accept my sympathies.
As for the funeral, if people want to raise their eyebrows, let them get on with it and do whatever you feel is right for your mum.
One of the hardest parts of a funeral, I think, is the walking into a church full of people. At the funeral of the father of a friend of mine, the family (including dad) arrived at the church first and met all the mourners at the door. A brave thing for them to do, but it felt right for them. Their father had been a vicar himself, so perhaps he had got the idea from one of his parishoners.
Dear Kate
Please do the funeral your way. The church should be open to people worshipping in whatever way seem appropriate to them. The ones that aren't are the ones that are losing members. Most churches these days use guitar music, modern hymns lend themselves to that.
The service you have planned sounds perfect. I suppose many people think a funeral service should be sad and solemn, but I think it makes much more sense to have it reflect your mum's life.
Never mind the knockers, do it your way!
Love,
Please do the funeral your way. The church should be open to people worshipping in whatever way seem appropriate to them. The ones that aren't are the ones that are losing members. Most churches these days use guitar music, modern hymns lend themselves to that.
The service you have planned sounds perfect. I suppose many people think a funeral service should be sad and solemn, but I think it makes much more sense to have it reflect your mum's life.
Never mind the knockers, do it your way!
Love,
Kate
((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))
I am so sorry to hear about your Mum. That must have been a shock. You are right though about being able to start remembering the person pre dementia after they have gone. I remember Mum now as My Mum rather than the lady she became. It started when I wrote about her life for the Minister.
Your service sounds lovely. It will be ahrd but it will be a fitting tribute to your Mum.
Sending you courage and comfort for the days ahead.
Love
Mameeskye
((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))
I am so sorry to hear about your Mum. That must have been a shock. You are right though about being able to start remembering the person pre dementia after they have gone. I remember Mum now as My Mum rather than the lady she became. It started when I wrote about her life for the Minister.
Your service sounds lovely. It will be ahrd but it will be a fitting tribute to your Mum.
Sending you courage and comfort for the days ahead.
Love
Mameeskye
Kate
sorry to hear about your Mum.
I am glad that you are doing your own thing at the funeral.
Our three grand children came to Peg's funeral,one of them wrote a poem and a dear friend gave Peg's life history.
There is a church near to us where the lady vicar plays the guitar.
Norman
sorry to hear about your Mum.
I am glad that you are doing your own thing at the funeral.
Our three grand children came to Peg's funeral,one of them wrote a poem and a dear friend gave Peg's life history.
There is a church near to us where the lady vicar plays the guitar.
Norman
Dear Kate,
Please accept my sincere condolences for the loss of your mum.
I hope you get the funeral you want for your mum, I think within reason no-one should be denied any reasonable request.
When we had dads funeral in the church dad had always gone to and had helped in any way he could, his priest refused the only none traditional request we made. we wanted to play Nat King Cole's Love me tender and he wouldn't even consider it, or any other music that was not a hymn, because the funeral was to be immediately prior to HIS morning mass and it MAY " upset my parishioners"
Had it not been my dads dieing wish I would have gone somewhere else.
We didn't argue with him we just played it after "his service" at the graveside and "he" had to wait for us.
You stick with what you want its nothing to do with any-one else.
Take care Love Lynn
Please accept my sincere condolences for the loss of your mum.
I hope you get the funeral you want for your mum, I think within reason no-one should be denied any reasonable request.
When we had dads funeral in the church dad had always gone to and had helped in any way he could, his priest refused the only none traditional request we made. we wanted to play Nat King Cole's Love me tender and he wouldn't even consider it, or any other music that was not a hymn, because the funeral was to be immediately prior to HIS morning mass and it MAY " upset my parishioners"
Had it not been my dads dieing wish I would have gone somewhere else.
We didn't argue with him we just played it after "his service" at the graveside and "he" had to wait for us.
You stick with what you want its nothing to do with any-one else.
Take care Love Lynn
Dear Kate, my condolences on the loss of your mum. My mum died quickly a month ago and so I feel for the situation that you find yourself in. It is a very bizarre time and I know that for me I thought that the ill health she had leading up to it and the dementia would prepare you for this but it didn't it is a whole new set of grieving that you do.
As for the funeral you have to do what you want and what fitted your mum. You know that all the people who knew her will get a real sense of her through whatever you decide to do. We had someone sing a song at my mums and this really made people really think about my mum because she was a singer herself.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and yours
Heather xx
As for the funeral you have to do what you want and what fitted your mum. You know that all the people who knew her will get a real sense of her through whatever you decide to do. We had someone sing a song at my mums and this really made people really think about my mum because she was a singer herself.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and yours
Heather xx
Mum's funeral
Thanks for all the support and good advice.
It was mum's funeral yesterday and we did things our way and it was truly wonderful. It was warm and informal and full of support and fellowship.
My dad and my husband played their guitars, I was a pall bearer and my sister and I both took the place of the sermon and instead talked about mum and her life before her illness. We even played her favourite song "Trashy Women". We had a memory wall and everyone added to it and brought pictures so we have lots of new memories too now.
As it was no one raised eyebrows on the day (that I know of!) and everyone said how lovely they thought it was. I hope we did her proud - one things for sure my shoulder is going to be bruised for a few days!!
Thanks for all the support and good advice.
It was mum's funeral yesterday and we did things our way and it was truly wonderful. It was warm and informal and full of support and fellowship.
My dad and my husband played their guitars, I was a pall bearer and my sister and I both took the place of the sermon and instead talked about mum and her life before her illness. We even played her favourite song "Trashy Women". We had a memory wall and everyone added to it and brought pictures so we have lots of new memories too now.
As it was no one raised eyebrows on the day (that I know of!) and everyone said how lovely they thought it was. I hope we did her proud - one things for sure my shoulder is going to be bruised for a few days!!
Dear Kate
So sorry to hear of your sad and sudden loss. It was the same with my mum last November, even faster, and such a shock. But I felt she had been perhaps spared years of worse trauma with the illness. I hope you and the family are coping.
Love
Margaret
So sorry to hear of your sad and sudden loss. It was the same with my mum last November, even faster, and such a shock. But I felt she had been perhaps spared years of worse trauma with the illness. I hope you and the family are coping.
Love
Margaret
