hello again! Christmas??

[Lynne]

Well, we all seem to agree that Christmas sucks

when complicated by AD, and all the emotional complications it causes.

Nat, I didn't mean to sound scolding, and I'm not offended. I don't think anyone's offended actually. That's one of the best things about this forum, you can get things off your chest and people will understand the need for that. I DO confess to envy of your seemingly unfailing energy and determination, and the amount of time and attention you give freely & generously, both to your Dad and to this TP, but it's not a nasty kind of envy.
I'm certainly not averse to straight talking myself, but try to recognise that people who are having a really hard time emotionally come here when they are down

For every story told here of which we think we know the details, there is probably a wealth of background info. which we know nothing about, so it can be easy to tread on sore toes sometimes without meaning to. Likewise behind your vigorous and forceful public face, there is still your Daddy's little girl weeping for him in the night. Don't think we don't feel for you and your pain too; {{{we do}}}.

 

[storm]

Hi All,Nat i totally agree with you many times i do not feel jolly i feel tired and worn down but when i go into mums room i put my mask on and i truly deserve a oscar! but it works because even if mum makes no sense at times she is very responsive to your mood and tone of voice. She used to love christmas even when she lived on her own now she doesnt understand whether its christmas or not but i will still carry on the same tree presents and good will to all and no i am not stronger than any one else sometimes i dread going to bed because i know the next day will be the same old grind but i will keep going and we will have christmas because every now and then mum will briefly snap to who knos how much they understand or take in life will go on because otherwise there would be no point to any of this caring . storm

 

[Canadian Joanne]

It's like that old song....

"to each his own, that's my philosophy
I don't know what's right for you,
you don't know what's right for me"

(now - what the ^&*% is the name of the song & who performed it?????)

I love Christmas (but no commercial stuff etc before Dec 1) and I am completely non-religious. But to me Christmas is the memories of my grandparents & my childhood. So I have (so far) done something with my mother on the day or Boxing Day. I bring her a cake for her birthday also, even if she hasn't got a clue it's her birthday. She loves cake & I love her.

Jane, what can anyone say to you? Keep to your plan and I'm sure you will be happy you did. Maybe not on the day, but years from now, when your dad is gone. Nobody copes with this stuff, we just muddle our way through somehow, we don't even know how most of the time.

Norman, I'm sorry you're so tired. But you're entitled to it, and entitled to observe the day the way you want. Maybe next year you'll be in the mood to do something. It's very hard to do Christmas dinner for 2.

Joanne

 

[Sheila]

Dear Jane, thinking of you, it won't be easy but what else can you do in the circumstances in all truth, try to see him either Christmas Eve or Boxing day and give your Mum some special time on Christmas day. Thats wehat I would do. Love and hugs, She. XX