Help with Eating Problem

[Vonny]

Hi, can anyone help? My mum has always been a picky eater but now it's got to the stage where she refuses most food. Dad feeds her 2 very soggy weetabix in the morning and she'll accept half a bowl of tomato soup at lunch, but come tea time.....
I always go in after work to feed mum so dad can eat his dinner while it's hot. More often than not mum gets tearful if made to eat more than a couple of mouthfuls and dad gets cross and upset because not eating is making her weaker presumably. She's been prescribed Fortisip (a protein drink) by the doctor and has 1 a day. Getting her to drink this, or anything else is a struggle as well. When it comes to her tea, I try to coax her to eat and usually manage to get her to eat a small portion of mash, say. It's all food which is easy to eat as she has few teeth. But when she's adamant she's had enough I leave it because I don't want her in tears and if she's having weetabix, soup and a protein drink when she's bedbound, at least that's some nutrition inside her. Am I doing the right thing? I really don't want to starve my mum but I don't want to force her to eat either. I'd be really grateful for some opinions here.
Many thanks
Vonny

 

[jenniferpa]

Vonny - I don't see what else you can do really. I mean to say, you can hardly force-feed her. The only thing I would say is worry more about calories rather than just "nutrition" - put cream in that soup if you can, or on her weetabix. If she feels more like sweet stuff (I'm thinking of rice pudding and the like) then let her eat that.

 

[toura]

hi vonny have you tried her fav foods and liquidise them
or even rice pudding or porridge and yogurts thats wat i do
for mum hope this is of any good to u

 

[germain]

Hi Vonny

And if she really likes sweet stuff put sugar on everything (including veg and meat) - as long as she's not diabetic of course.

Our Mum went down the Fortisip route but would also take extra creamy yoghurts, cream cheese, fruit smoothies, mashed banana with sugar,jelly, pureed strawberries and cream, any amount of soft cake and sponge puds etc etc. When she lived with us for a short while I managed to get about 6 small courses a day down her - all heavily calorie laden and when she moved into her care home at one point they managed to put 8 lbs on her just by offering her stuff she liked in very very small portions. Sometimes just leaving something by her that she could pick at in between meals would work.

Our Mum had a fairly good set of false teeth but kept either losing them or giving them away ! Everything she ate had to be capable of being mashed if needed.

Keep going - but keep the pressure off - something might just click one day - and whatever it is - if she likes it why ever not ?

All the best
germain

ps we used a straw for drinking - even warm tea - it caused less of the coughing episodes she had.

 

[Tarika]

Dear Vonny
Just a thought but has your mum had an assessment from a Speech and Language Therapist(SALT)? Does she have any problems/fear of swallowing? I ask this because it happened to my mum who stopped eating for two months. She was put onto a pureed diet with ensure milkshakes and is now eating much better
Love Tarika

 

[Vonny]

Thankyou!

Thank you so much for your replies - you've just taken a huge weight off my shoulders
I'm not sure about problems swallowing but I'll certainly follow it up and in the meantime I'll give her what she can and will eat. I'm going to show this thread to my dad. I did post him the link and said he could have my laptop to logon to TP whilst he was sitting by mum's bed but doesn't really have the heart for it I don't think.
Thanks again xxx

 

[Chrissyan]

Vonny: It might be worth getting it checked out in case she has a physical health problem that is causing her not to eat.

One T/P member found that their parent had anaemia & vitamin B12 injections sorted him out. My Dad eats about the same as your Mum & has recently been diagnosed with gastritis, we see the consultant again tomorrow.

 

[Vonny]

Thanks Chrissyan, when I said my mum was a picky eater it's because she's always had tummy troubles so that may have developed into something else. I'll speak to the nurse when she comes around on Monday and ask about the SALT which Tarika suggested, and a medical check for other problems.
Thanks so much xx