Hello everyone
I have not posted for a long while but have been on here every day following other people's stores. Sadly mum will hve nothing to do with me at all, refuses to let me in her house if the door is locked , if the door is unlocked and I go in she leaps up off the chair and goes for - me trying to scratch at my face or punching me wherever she can land her fists. She basically tells me she doesn't want me in her house, she wants nothing to do with me, she hates me - but she really gets angry and fired up. My brother goes every day and provides her meals and her shopping etc, and gives mum her tablets - she will not let me do a single thing for her (even though I do call every single day) as I do want to try and help.
I am at a loss as to what to do next, but my worry is what happens when my brother wants go go on holiday! He has a young family and is more than entitled to go away, but mum will not let anyone else do anything for her.
Now this should be a simple case of 'respite' for a week or so - sadly not - my brother is in complete denial and just says to me " oh she will let you do it all when she realises there is no one else for a couple of weeks"!!!! I don't think so. mum isn't doing this to be awkward, she really does not want me there, and for him to think she will just sit back and let it all happen in his absence is nonsense! I cnanot get through to him. But if he just ups and goes away (like he did last year with one days notice!!!!) I am left at home with mum, she won't eat food I prepare she just throws it on the floor! she won't take her tablets she puts them on the window sill or the table and forgets about them. She absolutely tells me straight - "I am not taking them just because you tell me to!!!")
I am at a loss what to do! she will be my responsibilty for a couple of weeks, without enough notice to sort any help out (she won't let carers in the door so we stopped them years ago!)
If I did manage to get some emergency respite, god forbid! it would probably kill her and then I have that on my conscience and my brother saying "I told you so". I feel I am dammed if I do and I'm dammed if I don't!
what would you do? Help !
Maggie. x
I have not posted for a long while but have been on here every day following other people's stores. Sadly mum will hve nothing to do with me at all, refuses to let me in her house if the door is locked , if the door is unlocked and I go in she leaps up off the chair and goes for - me trying to scratch at my face or punching me wherever she can land her fists. She basically tells me she doesn't want me in her house, she wants nothing to do with me, she hates me - but she really gets angry and fired up. My brother goes every day and provides her meals and her shopping etc, and gives mum her tablets - she will not let me do a single thing for her (even though I do call every single day) as I do want to try and help.
I am at a loss as to what to do next, but my worry is what happens when my brother wants go go on holiday! He has a young family and is more than entitled to go away, but mum will not let anyone else do anything for her.
Now this should be a simple case of 'respite' for a week or so - sadly not - my brother is in complete denial and just says to me " oh she will let you do it all when she realises there is no one else for a couple of weeks"!!!! I don't think so. mum isn't doing this to be awkward, she really does not want me there, and for him to think she will just sit back and let it all happen in his absence is nonsense! I cnanot get through to him. But if he just ups and goes away (like he did last year with one days notice!!!!) I am left at home with mum, she won't eat food I prepare she just throws it on the floor! she won't take her tablets she puts them on the window sill or the table and forgets about them. She absolutely tells me straight - "I am not taking them just because you tell me to!!!")
I am at a loss what to do! she will be my responsibilty for a couple of weeks, without enough notice to sort any help out (she won't let carers in the door so we stopped them years ago!)
If I did manage to get some emergency respite, god forbid! it would probably kill her and then I have that on my conscience and my brother saying "I told you so". I feel I am dammed if I do and I'm dammed if I don't!
what would you do? Help !
Maggie. x