Health LPA - How do we resolve conflict between dad's wishes and practical reality

[Fish]

Rather belatedly we are applying for the health LPA for my father but have come to what seems like an impasse.

My father is still able to make his own decisions and he is adamant that he should not be put in a care home as his dementia progresses. But the unavoidable reality is that with my mother as the only carer, who herself has failing health, there is no realistic way for her to care for him as time goes on and a care home would seem the only realistic alternative.

So, my dad would like to add in the LPA that he should not be put in a care home but the reality is that we can't guarantee that. Is there any way around this in terms of achieving a workable health LPA?

 

[DesperateofDevon]

You need to speak to someone at the office of Guardians for advice. They are really lovely & will advise you on what can & cant be enforced through the LPA, & how things can be worded. we went through a solicitor & it was money well spent as far as I’m concerned.
codicil can be added to the LPA but best interests & medical directives hold as much sway in reality; that’s been my experience so far anyway.

 

[canary]

If you never manage to get a Health&Welfare POA, dont worry too much. Mum would never sign a POA and then she lost capacity. It didnt seem to make much difference, though. She fought tooth and nail against going into a care home, but after a TIA everyone knew that we could not keep her safe at home, so she moved into a care home from hospital.
Having fought so hard against moving into a care home I was amazed that she settled, joined in the activities, made friends and was happy!

 

[nitram]

It's up to your Dad whether or not he appoints a H&W LPA and if he decides to add a clause specifying conditions.

With the 'not put in care home' clause inserted it could mean a court application to override it at some time in the future when he had lost capacity.

Without the LPA it could just happen or require a formal best interests decision.
Many people manage without an H&W LPA, I had one for my wife but never had to use it.