aggression
It has been very interesting and useful reading back through this thread. My mother has dementia (type never confirmed). She lived with my father until his death in the summer of 2015 at the same time my mother was admitted to hospital for a serious bowel problem, which required surgery and lead to a 5-6 week hospital stay.
I believe her time in hospital and the loss of my father had a significant negative effect on her dementia.
Now we have a 24 hr carer (on to the 3rd or 4th) and the current one is utterly brilliant and patient, but is reaching her wits end. My mother wants to live her old life, seeing friends, loads of activities, always out, always busy, but her friends are old, cannot cope with mum's behaviour or/and cannot take responsibility for her.
Mum resents having a carer, refuses to believe she needs a carer (although she regularly leaves pans on the stove, forgets to eat etc etc and it is plainly obvious that she does), she doesn't understand why I've taken her car away (I've set up a cab account instead), constantly asks where her car is, has taken to drinking too much (this started as a glass of wine with her meals, but she forgets how much she's had and has started drinking anything she can find from mid morning.
But the biggest problem is the violence. She gets very frustrated and angry and this anger is taken out on the carer (mostly but has also been against members of the family, cab drivers and anyone who she sees as preventing her doing what she wants, hitting, biting, kicking and pinching).
So it has been interesting to read about the links between drugs and violence. Mum is on Memantine, donepetzil and Lorazepam (the latter has been prescribed to help curb her aggression). The big worry I have is what happens if her current carer gives up. Before she took the role, the company we use warned us that this was the last option after mum's aggression had made all other carers give up. If we lose this carer we are stuck and we'll have to find a place in a home (not easy and with mum's aggressive behaviour I imagine that she will be doped to the eyeballs).
Any thoughts? Should I look to ween mum off the cocktail of drugs? might this be heightening her aggression?
Thanks
It has been very interesting and useful reading back through this thread. My mother has dementia (type never confirmed). She lived with my father until his death in the summer of 2015 at the same time my mother was admitted to hospital for a serious bowel problem, which required surgery and lead to a 5-6 week hospital stay.
I believe her time in hospital and the loss of my father had a significant negative effect on her dementia.
Now we have a 24 hr carer (on to the 3rd or 4th) and the current one is utterly brilliant and patient, but is reaching her wits end. My mother wants to live her old life, seeing friends, loads of activities, always out, always busy, but her friends are old, cannot cope with mum's behaviour or/and cannot take responsibility for her.
Mum resents having a carer, refuses to believe she needs a carer (although she regularly leaves pans on the stove, forgets to eat etc etc and it is plainly obvious that she does), she doesn't understand why I've taken her car away (I've set up a cab account instead), constantly asks where her car is, has taken to drinking too much (this started as a glass of wine with her meals, but she forgets how much she's had and has started drinking anything she can find from mid morning.
But the biggest problem is the violence. She gets very frustrated and angry and this anger is taken out on the carer (mostly but has also been against members of the family, cab drivers and anyone who she sees as preventing her doing what she wants, hitting, biting, kicking and pinching).
So it has been interesting to read about the links between drugs and violence. Mum is on Memantine, donepetzil and Lorazepam (the latter has been prescribed to help curb her aggression). The big worry I have is what happens if her current carer gives up. Before she took the role, the company we use warned us that this was the last option after mum's aggression had made all other carers give up. If we lose this carer we are stuck and we'll have to find a place in a home (not easy and with mum's aggressive behaviour I imagine that she will be doped to the eyeballs).
Any thoughts? Should I look to ween mum off the cocktail of drugs? might this be heightening her aggression?
Thanks