I have lived with my mother all my life ( 61 years), and last week decided I could cope with looking after her no more, and agreed for her to go into a home.Altho' I am relieved that I don't have to be worrying about her all day, I do miss her. She used to ( still does, on good days) sing to herself, and thats what I miss most. I understand why my friend in London has his radio or cd player on so much. It feels strange; I should be enjoying the freedom from worry, but getting my head around the fact of her not being in the house is difficult. I know, it's a matter of time, but it's difficult in the interim. People say: you can relax now, yes but I'm not carefree. I still have to worry about getting enough clothes together for my visits and worrying how is she today. Disengaging from the carer role is not an easy thing.