I'm wearing bronze earrings for your tummy mummy @DesperateofDevon , never heard that phrase but it's firmly in my memory bank, utterly charming and you are twice as lucky to have two wonderful mums.
xx
xx
I'm wearing bronze earrings for your tummy mummy @DesperateofDevon , never heard that phrase but it's firmly in my memory bank, utterly charming and you are twice as lucky to have two wonderful mums.
xx
oh my days i can hear your frustrations and dismay in your words!
It is so unfair ...the whole system is wrong.......do they really think just doing the paperwork and lip service is acceptable!
So sorry for your poor Dad ..and you and your family having to go through this.
This 'care' home are paid to look after his best interest and make sure he is cared for!
what a joke......not funny!
its not selfish....its self-preservation we all have to do it to survive. Its a rough road we are traveling.
slow down not melt down is better for everyone. otherwise looking after you is added to the mix too
take care
Paramedics day so as does the doctor who visited the home. Yet the home keep acting as if he’s fine..... it just doesn’t make sense. Dads TEP form has kicked in, he’s renal reading aren’t good, he’s been removed from all medication bar two so from 11 tablets to 2 & the pain patches have been increased & oromorph as required.... but the home seem incapable of being aware of when he is in pain.
No matter how many times the home are asked by medics to take notice of our observations the home just won’t do it! I was with Dad for hours yesterday & the day before & kept asking for his oromorph to be given but the home wouldn’t follow the every 4 hours & as required given with the prescription.
How can this be allowed they keep saying it isn’t required but Dad slumped forward his head on his knees almost because of his pain is unbearable to see. The ignorance & arrogance of certain staff members makes it impossible for others to do their jobs properly.
no wonder families give up it would’ve easier to just walk away & ignore it all - have a life myself & go on holiday like normal people do.......but instead I am daily battling to try & get the home to understand the health issues Dads had for decades & get the support & care he now requires.
I have been surprised at some end of life care situations I’ve seen at the home, the more challenging ones - but who am I to judge a snapshot of time. Yet others who are at end of life care & are immobile & vegatative are obviously easier to deal with & need less nursing.
The home told me on Sunday that CHC funding had been applied for, yet a SALT assessment criteria the home said wasn’t met. If you can’t swallow your food properly & cant express yourself what else can the criteria be.
Dads lost so much weight he is skeletal, when we are present he has issues & cant feed himself- it’s beyond just extra encouragement that the home say he requires & Protein shakes!
Even the Doctor said yesterday if he wants ice cream for every meal give him ice cream maybe try some jelly with it.
so the nightmare continues each day & it doesn’t seem to get easier. The unfairness & indignity of Dads situation is breaking my heart. It’s a very lonely path being an only child & not having the support from immediate family that you require that are all absent at this moment in time, busy with their own lives.
I am slightly jealous that they can walk away from this horrid situation, switch off from it.
I go back into the home each day & see Dad doubled over in pain & my heart brakes all over again. Why can the management overrule those who genuinely care & want to do a good job. The resident should always be the priority
Hi there my lovely. My mother is at the same stage as your poor father. My situation is rather different, as mum is at home ( care packages etc ok) my father is her carer. Me and my sister support too. My problem is that my father is in denial as to how serious this is. He is not being particularly rational and it’s had a serious knock on affect to my own frail mental health ( I’ve got BPD at al ) I have a crisis appointment with my own cpn this afternoon, I just wanted to contibute to your heartbreaking post. I send you ❤️❤️ as I understand. This vile Alzheimer’s has destroyed our family and now my dad is pressurising me and my sister to agree to move into the house should something happen to him. This is an unbearable level of pressure- like you I am at breaking point. I am 55 and my mother was diagnosed 13 years ago. Both my sister and I have just lost the last 13 years, as we have been supporting my father from day 1 . We were never asked if we are ok despite the knowledge that neither me or sis are coping with the stress. My father has closed his mind to the fact that we are near the end. I am at breaking point and after I have been over with mum this morning, I intend speaking with my mental health support about a crisis plan for me. I feel like I need to escape and it’s horrible.
We all have to have self preservation or we go under.I think as an only child that is that seems to be at the four front!I am so sorry that you are in this situation. I am lucky in having Dad in CH & mum a distance away with carers - & I really appreciate that when I read other carers posts.
it gets to a point where you don’t have a life - I can see that.
Please take care of you first & foremost.
My Mum said on Sunday “ you don’t really have a life do you?”
that insight made me think about what is it that makes us do what we do as carers.
I don’t have any answers but know now that self preservation has got to be a major part in my life now. I feel so unwell all the time & people keep telling me I look ill!!
I hope you find resolution-soon.
Take care & hijack away, it’s nice to have social interaction!
x
I know you are a crafter .I’m like a flat battery at the moment - but hoping to get my act together a bit more this weekend!
Work on Friday & Saturday! Eeeek ! Better pull finger out if I want stock to sell! xx
Love thatView attachment 61761 Vintage finds, upcycled items & local finds( including skip diving ) turned art & items for the home! Basically what other people throw away!!! Including rusty nails
That is gorgeous! You are very clever.View attachment 61761 Vintage finds, upcycled items & local finds( including skip diving ) turned art & items for the home! Basically what other people throw away!!! Including rusty nails