Hello all,
My Dad had his referral at the Memory Clinic on Monday. We're waiting for a CT scan before final diagnosis but I'm pretty sure we'll get a dementia diagnosis. He was told at the appointment not to drive at night or on the motorway but instantly forgot and has been hassling a friend who lives an hour away to go out for a meal in the evening. He received a letter from the clinic today saying not to drive at all and he hit the roof. Funnily enough the shock made him quite lucid and cogent in his argument that it was "pure ageism". I live more than 150 miles from him but my sister lives 15 mins from him. However she's going through chemotherapy and is now finding the short daily visits too much. The clinic nurse, unprompted, told us that Dad needs daily domiciliary care (just 30 mins or so), even before the diagnosis. We decided against raising it today, but we'll need to very shortly.
My difficulty is, we have had an agency round "for a chat" before, that didn't go down well. I'm hoping that I can frame it in terms of he needs carers for my sister's benefit, not that he can remember she's ill, or seems that concerned. However, he's become really mean with his money and won't spend anything. He's said, if we want him to have care, we have to pay for it. We do have power of attorney, just waiting for the objection period to pass, but even when this is finalised, doesn't he still have control of his finances? If we can't persuade him to take on responsibility for paying them, are we just stuck?
Any advice very gratefully received!
My Dad had his referral at the Memory Clinic on Monday. We're waiting for a CT scan before final diagnosis but I'm pretty sure we'll get a dementia diagnosis. He was told at the appointment not to drive at night or on the motorway but instantly forgot and has been hassling a friend who lives an hour away to go out for a meal in the evening. He received a letter from the clinic today saying not to drive at all and he hit the roof. Funnily enough the shock made him quite lucid and cogent in his argument that it was "pure ageism". I live more than 150 miles from him but my sister lives 15 mins from him. However she's going through chemotherapy and is now finding the short daily visits too much. The clinic nurse, unprompted, told us that Dad needs daily domiciliary care (just 30 mins or so), even before the diagnosis. We decided against raising it today, but we'll need to very shortly.
My difficulty is, we have had an agency round "for a chat" before, that didn't go down well. I'm hoping that I can frame it in terms of he needs carers for my sister's benefit, not that he can remember she's ill, or seems that concerned. However, he's become really mean with his money and won't spend anything. He's said, if we want him to have care, we have to pay for it. We do have power of attorney, just waiting for the objection period to pass, but even when this is finalised, doesn't he still have control of his finances? If we can't persuade him to take on responsibility for paying them, are we just stuck?
Any advice very gratefully received!