Mum seems really depressed this week, is this linked to her memory problems increasing or do you think it's seperate?
She's not been diagnosed with any sort of dementia yet as we only just got her to gp on friday but has been having problems over the last couple of years and the last few months struggles to remember most things we say to her, has trouble following conversations and tv programmes, changes her mind frequently and gets quite annoyed at us for doing the original thing and the last few weeks forgot her house, my house, whether she has a job, her age and had a few big panics about losing keys and how to do things.
She has been increasingly low in her mood over the last few months especially as her memory has been getting much worse over the last couple of months. For the last few months she has been talking about how lonely she is and she was either ringing me lots wanting me to talk to her because she was bored or asking me to go over more and more. I now see her for some of almost every day, and some of every day this week. It doesn't seem to be helping her feel any better though. As soon as I'm not there she's bored and lonely again and saying she doesn't want to be on her own. When I say I'm going over she asks if I can go over sooner. Even when I'm with her she is still bored at times, when I'm not talking she'll say she's bored or your not talking to me. I don't know what to do to help apart from be with her 24/7 which I'm sure is what she wants but I don't think will solve her low mood completely.
She never seems to know what to do to fill the time she's on her own. She's stopped doing most of her housework and only seems to do a little bit or let me do something if I go on and that's only been a few times in the last couple of months. She was always BIG on cleaning but now doesn't seem to bother, at first I thought it was due to her forgetting when she had done it or forgot that it needed doing, but today she said whats the point, no one sees it, its only me, nobody comes to see me. (I see her nearly every day and so does hubby but we don't count). She says she's cleaned for 70 odd year and where has it got her. She said she knows it would pass some time but she can't be bothered so she just sits and stares at the wall instead and cries.
She used to puzzles a lot but doesn't do them as much now as not as good at them, she doesn't seem to be reading as much and tends to put the tele on and either constantly turn over or just leaves the same channel on for hours, she barely seems to watch it.
She keeps saying that she's just so lonely and doesn't want to be on her own and wishes she had friends and more people around her, she said maybe she'd be better in a home then there'd be people around her but usually as soon as I mention doctor or memory team she goes back to her default of they'll stick me in a home and I don't want to go in a home.
That happened today as someone rang from memory services while I was there to arrange coming to see her after her gp referal. I answered the phone as I was sat next to it so arranged appointment for her and when I hung up mum said, have you been telling people about me. I told her we'd been to gp on friday and they had referred her to memory clinic and that was who had rung. Told her about appointment. She wasn't happy, said they would stick her in home, If I told them she was mental she'd not talk to me anymore and I just wanted stick her in home. I'm not sure how the visit with memory nurse will go as at gps on friday she more or less said nothing wrong and it was me.
She rang tonight to ask if she was seeing me today, seems she'd forgot I had been over today. She was upset and fed up and said she didn't know what to do with herself, what to do and who she was, she was so fed up. She asked me not to leave her on own too much. I told her about todays visit and that I'd be going tomorrow but I didn't know what else to do to make her feel better.
Is this part of the dementia or seperate depression. Should I try to mention it to memory lady when she comes?
She's not been diagnosed with any sort of dementia yet as we only just got her to gp on friday but has been having problems over the last couple of years and the last few months struggles to remember most things we say to her, has trouble following conversations and tv programmes, changes her mind frequently and gets quite annoyed at us for doing the original thing and the last few weeks forgot her house, my house, whether she has a job, her age and had a few big panics about losing keys and how to do things.
She has been increasingly low in her mood over the last few months especially as her memory has been getting much worse over the last couple of months. For the last few months she has been talking about how lonely she is and she was either ringing me lots wanting me to talk to her because she was bored or asking me to go over more and more. I now see her for some of almost every day, and some of every day this week. It doesn't seem to be helping her feel any better though. As soon as I'm not there she's bored and lonely again and saying she doesn't want to be on her own. When I say I'm going over she asks if I can go over sooner. Even when I'm with her she is still bored at times, when I'm not talking she'll say she's bored or your not talking to me. I don't know what to do to help apart from be with her 24/7 which I'm sure is what she wants but I don't think will solve her low mood completely.
She never seems to know what to do to fill the time she's on her own. She's stopped doing most of her housework and only seems to do a little bit or let me do something if I go on and that's only been a few times in the last couple of months. She was always BIG on cleaning but now doesn't seem to bother, at first I thought it was due to her forgetting when she had done it or forgot that it needed doing, but today she said whats the point, no one sees it, its only me, nobody comes to see me. (I see her nearly every day and so does hubby but we don't count). She says she's cleaned for 70 odd year and where has it got her. She said she knows it would pass some time but she can't be bothered so she just sits and stares at the wall instead and cries.
She used to puzzles a lot but doesn't do them as much now as not as good at them, she doesn't seem to be reading as much and tends to put the tele on and either constantly turn over or just leaves the same channel on for hours, she barely seems to watch it.
She keeps saying that she's just so lonely and doesn't want to be on her own and wishes she had friends and more people around her, she said maybe she'd be better in a home then there'd be people around her but usually as soon as I mention doctor or memory team she goes back to her default of they'll stick me in a home and I don't want to go in a home.
That happened today as someone rang from memory services while I was there to arrange coming to see her after her gp referal. I answered the phone as I was sat next to it so arranged appointment for her and when I hung up mum said, have you been telling people about me. I told her we'd been to gp on friday and they had referred her to memory clinic and that was who had rung. Told her about appointment. She wasn't happy, said they would stick her in home, If I told them she was mental she'd not talk to me anymore and I just wanted stick her in home. I'm not sure how the visit with memory nurse will go as at gps on friday she more or less said nothing wrong and it was me.
She rang tonight to ask if she was seeing me today, seems she'd forgot I had been over today. She was upset and fed up and said she didn't know what to do with herself, what to do and who she was, she was so fed up. She asked me not to leave her on own too much. I told her about todays visit and that I'd be going tomorrow but I didn't know what else to do to make her feel better.
Is this part of the dementia or seperate depression. Should I try to mention it to memory lady when she comes?