My dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about two years ago. I have to admit I really struggled with his diagnosis at first. He was diagnosed relatively young for the disease and I was in my mid-twenties. I felt incredibly isolated and I think this led me and my family sticking my head in the sand. In the early stages we should have sorted power of attorney out but just didn’t realise how quickly he would loose his independence.
He can no longer care for himself at all and although he can still speak most of the time he doesn’t make a great deal of sense. He was receiving a care visit once a day and had a social worker assigned to him.
Just over a month ago he managed to injure his face (we don’t even know how!) and was admitted to hospital. This brought to light that my mum was really struggling at home with him but didn’t seem to want to admit that there was a problem. I have to say when he was in hospital it was a relief as I knew he was well cared for and that my mum could get some rest. I visited nearly every day for the two weeks he was in for, the nurses were fantastic.
He now receives three visits a day from carers. He is suffering badly from Diarrhea which seems triggered by medication. My mum has had to clean up the mess on many occasions and is at her wits end. Even when a doctor has visited they still don’t seem to take any notice of my mums concerns or factor in her quality of life and how this is impacting her.
The social worker seems to mean well but is very jittery and not as calm as collected as I would like (or need!) This seems to rub my mum up the wrong way and can make it very difficult for myself and my brother who are trying our best to help. She is the polar opposite of the calm, personable and up beat nurses on the ward he was put on at the hospital.
The finances are a complete nightmare, my mum never did any of the banking herself and does not know how to check his banking or account. We are being hounded by the council over getting the statements to enable a financial assessment. The worst bit is they come across so patronising when I have spoken to them and feign sympathy whilst really only wanting the payment.
(I understand this but wish they would get to the point and be direct instead of pretending to care!)
Myself and my brother are now in the early stages of filling out the deputyship forms to enable us to take control of the finances and sort the care bill out.
We are both at our wits end and I feel like we are trapped in a nightmare of trying to help my mum, doing what’s best for my dad and dealing with the irritating social workers!!
My life and health are suffering, I am in a constant state of anxiousness, feel sick when a number rings me whilst I’m at work and just wishing I could be a normal 27 year old. My work have been understanding and when he was admitted to hospital I worked from home and had the time off I needed.
My mum tells me not to worry but doesn’t realise it’s also her I’m worried about as I feel her memory is suffering, that she’s struggling at home with my dad and is also isolated as she can’t leave him much and now rarely leaves the house apart from seeing a friend on the odd occasion or going to the local shop to pick up food.
I feel lost and that I just can’t cope, I just don’t know what to do anymore. It feels like I’m in a living nightmare with no end in site.
Has anyone else had problems with finances / had to fill in deputyship forms / had problems with social workers?
Apologies for the long winded post.
He can no longer care for himself at all and although he can still speak most of the time he doesn’t make a great deal of sense. He was receiving a care visit once a day and had a social worker assigned to him.
Just over a month ago he managed to injure his face (we don’t even know how!) and was admitted to hospital. This brought to light that my mum was really struggling at home with him but didn’t seem to want to admit that there was a problem. I have to say when he was in hospital it was a relief as I knew he was well cared for and that my mum could get some rest. I visited nearly every day for the two weeks he was in for, the nurses were fantastic.
He now receives three visits a day from carers. He is suffering badly from Diarrhea which seems triggered by medication. My mum has had to clean up the mess on many occasions and is at her wits end. Even when a doctor has visited they still don’t seem to take any notice of my mums concerns or factor in her quality of life and how this is impacting her.
The social worker seems to mean well but is very jittery and not as calm as collected as I would like (or need!) This seems to rub my mum up the wrong way and can make it very difficult for myself and my brother who are trying our best to help. She is the polar opposite of the calm, personable and up beat nurses on the ward he was put on at the hospital.
The finances are a complete nightmare, my mum never did any of the banking herself and does not know how to check his banking or account. We are being hounded by the council over getting the statements to enable a financial assessment. The worst bit is they come across so patronising when I have spoken to them and feign sympathy whilst really only wanting the payment.
(I understand this but wish they would get to the point and be direct instead of pretending to care!)
Myself and my brother are now in the early stages of filling out the deputyship forms to enable us to take control of the finances and sort the care bill out.
We are both at our wits end and I feel like we are trapped in a nightmare of trying to help my mum, doing what’s best for my dad and dealing with the irritating social workers!!
My life and health are suffering, I am in a constant state of anxiousness, feel sick when a number rings me whilst I’m at work and just wishing I could be a normal 27 year old. My work have been understanding and when he was admitted to hospital I worked from home and had the time off I needed.
My mum tells me not to worry but doesn’t realise it’s also her I’m worried about as I feel her memory is suffering, that she’s struggling at home with my dad and is also isolated as she can’t leave him much and now rarely leaves the house apart from seeing a friend on the odd occasion or going to the local shop to pick up food.
I feel lost and that I just can’t cope, I just don’t know what to do anymore. It feels like I’m in a living nightmare with no end in site.
Has anyone else had problems with finances / had to fill in deputyship forms / had problems with social workers?
Apologies for the long winded post.
