My hubby had 3 bad falls on saturday just gone, because he can no longer manage the stairs he sleeps down stairs in the conservatory on the double sofa bed, which he is very comfortable with. Saturday morning I came downstairs about 7-30 to find him on the floor on his back in the lounge, which joins on to conservetory, he was in quite an distressed state soaking wet but that was were he had been sweating, his head and body was all sweating. He said he had been calling me but I'm embarrassed to say I didnt hear a thing and I feel so bad. I struggled for quite a while to get him up but it was a dead weight so said I would use the lifeline, he was shouting at me NOT to phone them but obviously I had to, they called paramedics and they came about half hour later. They got him sorted and comfortable in chair and all was fine, he slept in chair for couple hrs, so I put some washing on the garden line, but in the few mins I was doing that he woke and tried to get out chair totoro toilet and fell again, I did manage after a while to get him up that time but it hurt my back, but he was ok. Eventually he went to bathroom his walking was very bad even with his frame but I thought he was ok but coming back from bathroom he FELL AGAIN for 3rd time, I pressed the lifeline and paramedic came again but not for about hour n half so he was on the floor all that time. Hubby is now in hospital as paramedics said it was their duty to keep him safe and he wasnt safe with all his falls. Today the Dr said he was medically fit enough to come home tomorrow, but his walking is still very bad so I told him I wasnt happy for him to come yet as he would still be having these falls. I dont think Dr was very happy about that, I've asked for an OT person to see him on the ward to check out his mobility and whether she thinks he should come home already, I'm still shatterd from the very traumatic saturday.what would other people do, in this situation
His bad mobility is making life more difficult.
- Thread starter pevensey
- Start date
Hi @pevensey
What a traumatic time you are having.
My situation has been slightly different but my wife (PWD) was admitted to hospital whilst on 2 weeks respite at the beginning of August. Although her mobility was declining, she developed a UTI during this time and when I arrived back from holiday the next day, I found her in the CDU and her mobility was virtually non-existent!
and I broke my heart.
They confirmed she was being treated for the UTI but wanted to discharge her, so like you, I insisted that she wasn't going anywhere until she'd been assessed by an OT plus the on-site social worker.
The OT confirmed my fears that she should not be discharged (back to the respite centre or back home). She spent a week on a ward then went back to the respite unit for assessment.
She is still there but has been assessed by the SW team as needing full time residential care, which is heartbreaking but realistically, I can not continue caring for her at home, given her lack of mobility now. The UTI also seems to have accelerated the progression of the dementia, as she is certainly sleeping a lot more and doesn't seem quite so with it? (they have retested for UTI's etc and all okay).
We have managed, through the LA adult care team, to get her a place in a nursing home and all being well, she will be moving there later this week.
I've detailed this "journey" in my thread "Respite Woes" if you're interested.
Good luck and I wish you and your husband well.
Phil
What a traumatic time you are having.
My situation has been slightly different but my wife (PWD) was admitted to hospital whilst on 2 weeks respite at the beginning of August. Although her mobility was declining, she developed a UTI during this time and when I arrived back from holiday the next day, I found her in the CDU and her mobility was virtually non-existent!
and I broke my heart.They confirmed she was being treated for the UTI but wanted to discharge her, so like you, I insisted that she wasn't going anywhere until she'd been assessed by an OT plus the on-site social worker.
The OT confirmed my fears that she should not be discharged (back to the respite centre or back home). She spent a week on a ward then went back to the respite unit for assessment.
She is still there but has been assessed by the SW team as needing full time residential care, which is heartbreaking but realistically, I can not continue caring for her at home, given her lack of mobility now. The UTI also seems to have accelerated the progression of the dementia, as she is certainly sleeping a lot more and doesn't seem quite so with it? (they have retested for UTI's etc and all okay).
We have managed, through the LA adult care team, to get her a place in a nursing home and all being well, she will be moving there later this week.
I've detailed this "journey" in my thread "Respite Woes" if you're interested.
Good luck and I wish you and your husband well.
Phil
It is difficult dealing with poor mobility, in fact I would say it's worse than dealing with no mobility. OH went into hospital walking 3 miles a day and came out having to be hoisted but once he's up and in his chair he's settled.
You did the right thing asking for an OT asscessment they may be able to suggest a few changes that will help. By the time they are in place it will hopefully give you a little time to recuperate.
You did the right thing asking for an OT asscessment they may be able to suggest a few changes that will help. By the time they are in place it will hopefully give you a little time to recuperate.
Hello @pevensey
This is what forced me into the decision for residential care.
My husband was falling out of bed every night and even though I was in the same bed as he was, I still didn`t hear him try to get up, so please don`t feel bad you didn`t hear your husband in another room.
I was calling the paramedics too because I couldn`t help him up. They were wonderful and very understanding but they, our CPN and SW eventually decided we were both at risk, me because of my back and joint problems and my husband in case he broke something when he fell.
24/7 care was the only answer.
Not surprising my son and I had reached the same decision at the same time.
My husband could not remember he was losing his mobility and needed help.
It sounds as if you might be in the same place. Sad but true.
This is what forced me into the decision for residential care.
My husband was falling out of bed every night and even though I was in the same bed as he was, I still didn`t hear him try to get up, so please don`t feel bad you didn`t hear your husband in another room.
I was calling the paramedics too because I couldn`t help him up. They were wonderful and very understanding but they, our CPN and SW eventually decided we were both at risk, me because of my back and joint problems and my husband in case he broke something when he fell.
24/7 care was the only answer.
Not surprising my son and I had reached the same decision at the same time.
My husband could not remember he was losing his mobility and needed help.
It sounds as if you might be in the same place. Sad but true.
Hi @pevensey, what an awful time you have had, I'm not surprised you are shattered, emotionally and physically I expect. Please do not feel guilty you have nothing to feel guilty about.
In my opinion you have done the right thing to have an OT assessment, I am surprised that the hospital were discharging him without that! The only problem I found that the actually OT rehab in the hospital is insufficient generally if mobility was an issue before going in, so he may need to be transferred to a nursing home for rehab. It sounds as though you have already kitted your house out with all the necessary adaptations so there is probably nothing to do there. I wish you and your husband all the best, let us know how things go.
In my opinion you have done the right thing to have an OT assessment, I am surprised that the hospital were discharging him without that! The only problem I found that the actually OT rehab in the hospital is insufficient generally if mobility was an issue before going in, so he may need to be transferred to a nursing home for rehab. It sounds as though you have already kitted your house out with all the necessary adaptations so there is probably nothing to do there. I wish you and your husband all the best, let us know how things go.
You have done exactly the right thing in asking for OT input. You should also ask for physios to check him out. Medically fit means nothing! OH couldn't walk anymore, went into hospital and they wanted to discharge him after a week. I refused on the grounds that we live in a third flour flat without a lift, and if he couldn't make it to his day care centre, I'd essentially be trapped with him. They said they would send community physios but I said it wasn't enough. On my insistence he got transferred to a physio ward where he stayed a couple of months until the ward was closed down. He was then directly transferred into a care home.
Thankyou Grannie G, I'm not sure if it will soon be time for care home, but such a big decision but I'm getting so tired and ache all over after last saturday, I was trying to lift him before I let lifeline people call paramedics twice. But I've noticed that when hes in different surroundings with lots people and things going on he seems happier, interested in what's going on, not that he goes anywhere much like that just hospital app and stuff, my daughter was saying that he might be happier in A NICE care home because of all the hustle n bustle. At the moment at home he just sits and doesn't do anything cos he wont read anymore and he can't go out cos of mobility. The place hes going for rehab is a care home linked up to where he goes to his day centre twice a week, and my daughters boss told her it was a lovely care home and his mums there.SO when the time comes for permanent care at least he would have had a taste of staying g there and we could choose that one maybe.
Thankyou Beattie, the place hes going to for rehab is in a care home, and I've been told by someone who's mum is there that its lovely there so at least that's giving him a taste of care home life, ready for the future.
Hes being discharged from hospital to the rehab centre which is part of a care home about 5 miles away, when they have a bed, it's meant to be very nice there so hopefully he will be ok and it could be his care home when the time is ready.maybe. in the futre
Thankyou everyone for being there, my big guilt problem about thinking about full time care is, I read on here about all the so so distressing post of people with mums, dads, partners with some form of dementia and it sound absolutely horrific what they are going through, all the symptoms they have really advanced, incontinence, hallucinations, not recognising there family, and lots more terrible incidents there dealing with, my hubby is not that bad, his speech is slurred , his eating g is bad, hes cant or wont read anymore, he cant follow conversation. ITS JUST HIS MOBILITY that's the big problem, my point is all the people on here caring for family, partners with severe conditions are not talking of putting them into fulltime care, they keep going regardless of how immensely difficult it is for them. And here's me thinking of care home when it's his mobility I'm talking about.
I not sure if it's because we had a very difficult 57 yrs marriage, he was very difficult to live with, and I left him twice, and came back when he was diagnosed with vascular dementia, but maybe I'm making excuses.
I not sure if it's because we had a very difficult 57 yrs marriage, he was very difficult to live with, and I left him twice, and came back when he was diagnosed with vascular dementia, but maybe I'm making excuses.
My ho was walking with a walking sticky till januers 4 this year .put in hospital for 2 week Soto chest infecshion since then difficulty walking nd getting out of bed at night unable to sit up on own and incontenant . His legs cause a lot of pain at night been told he as some Parkinson’s not given pills as would interfere with vasscaler .e to won’t go out nd just sit watching tv when I get him of chair I get him to walk a little in to kitchen and back he mines all time nd as fell do to balance 5 times this month
No your not! My dad has very poor mobility and can only walk with a gutter frame.He is transferred using a Sara Steady and then into a wheelchair.
He has carers in 4times a day but I’m also here if needed.
Sometimes dad doesn’t realise how heavy he is ,that is why I have the carers in.
He just looks at the paper but doesn’t actually read it.He is wheeled into the conservatory to listen to the radio.
Yesterday he couldn’t get to grips with what I was asking him.
I know it is easier said than done.But try not to feel guilty.
Dad also has vascular dementia.At the moment he is not too bad as he has to stay where he is put.He will never be able to get up and walk on his own(without falling).
He is 86.
I’m not sure what medication your husband is on but dad is on the middle dose of Mirtazapine as he was getting agitated.But he is more settled now and sleeps better.
((hugs))
My aunt had vascular dementia @pevensey and she never got that bad apart from her mobility but we had to let her go into a carehome as the falls she kept having made it unsafe for her to stay at home, even though my dad stayed with her.
She was quite slight but he couldn't lift her by himself without risking hurting her.
She was quite slight but he couldn't lift her by himself without risking hurting her.
People only consider a Care Home placement for their PWD when they can no longer cope and for all of us that is going to be at a different stage and for different reasons so you have no reason to feel guilty or at fault because you are close to that state now Pevensey.
Poor you it sounds like you are coping with an awful lot. The problems with hospitals is as soon as you can mobilise that means just standing and taking one step really they send you home. I had the same problem with my husband who was falling all the time and it was killing my back constantly trying to get him up, I would call neighbours and anyone on the street to help me. Unfortunately the falls can start to affect the bladder which can become traumatised by constant falling and he may eventually not know when he wants to pee, this happened with my husband and necessitated him going into respite where he had 3 falls in 6 days even though I told them he needs to be watched. The result is now he is in a care home permanently, however I think the falls helped me to realise finally that I couldn't cope anymore and I think they needed to happen for me to move things forward. I'm not saying this will happen for you but be prepared. Good luck, I feel for you.
No, I don't think everyone keeps on going regardless. It's a matter of knowing your limits. You can't go on lifting him when he falls, you have to think of yourself. If you do yourself an injury you're not going to be much help to him, are you. You mustn't feel guilty.
Yes, Suzy C my hubby has got bladder problems too, he cant get to the toilet quick enough and he wee's before he gets there so then wets himself, this is a new thing, but test show theres no bladder infection., and yes it's my stomach and back that hurts all the time and I dont want to get I'll myself,
My OH is in respite at the moment but has lost his mobility - it takes 2 carers to help him up and walk a short distance. He fell yesterday whilst I was helping him into a chair, it took 3 carers to get him up. I am meeting with the social worker tomorrow to discuss options, but to be honest I don't know how I will manage him at home now, so he may end up staying in the care home, something I didn't want. I too feel dreadfully guilty but I don't know how to manage him at home, he is tall and well built so not easy to lift. Pevensey, you can't afford to compromise your health.
Best Wishes
It’s so difficult isn’t it - the deterioration each time following hospital admission is heartbreaking. I get so angry with the constant roundelay of ‘medically fit’ ‘therapy fit’ and so on to go home, what about ‘Carer fit’? It’s us that ends up trying to cope with the changes each time.
On a purely practical point re falling, we have been lent a fantastic contraption called a Raizer chair which I have used in anger for OH 5 or 6 times now so have not had to call for paramedics which seemed to be the only option. The first serious fall OH had that I couldn’t lift him up from was a shock and I was appalled that the only help available to get him up was a full ambulance crew (I couldn’t help thinking they should be dealing with RTAs etc) and we waited 3.5 hours for them.
The Raizer chair is brilliant and it came via one or other of the OT teams (NHS or Community).
However, further decrease on already decreased mobility plus further mental deterioration is another line in the sand that I suspect I will be facing very soon - the human heart always hopes but my head is preparing for us to meet our Waterloo when OH is discharged this time. Wish us luck please.
Sending supportive hugs all round to you my fellow TPers. Xx
On a purely practical point re falling, we have been lent a fantastic contraption called a Raizer chair which I have used in anger for OH 5 or 6 times now so have not had to call for paramedics which seemed to be the only option. The first serious fall OH had that I couldn’t lift him up from was a shock and I was appalled that the only help available to get him up was a full ambulance crew (I couldn’t help thinking they should be dealing with RTAs etc) and we waited 3.5 hours for them.
The Raizer chair is brilliant and it came via one or other of the OT teams (NHS or Community).
However, further decrease on already decreased mobility plus further mental deterioration is another line in the sand that I suspect I will be facing very soon - the human heart always hopes but my head is preparing for us to meet our Waterloo when OH is discharged this time. Wish us luck please.
Sending supportive hugs all round to you my fellow TPers. Xx
I've never heard of a raizer chair, just googled it, what a great piece of equipment. However like all these demonstrations they always use perfectly able bodied people who can bend their legs and keep them bent, or roll over when asked etc,etc. i'm sure for most it would be much more of a struggle but much better than lying on the floor for hours.
Recent Threads
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Just waiting for now. Exhausted. (26F)
- Latest: Lillian Magellan
-