Come and say hi! Mum recently diagnosed

Kellypc

New member
Sep 14, 2019
7
0
Hello. Mum was formally diagnosed with Alzheimers and PCA (bensons syndrome) recently and is on medication. Shes still working but increasingly general day to day activities are becoming a struggle. She called me yesterday and said that for a few moments at work she couldn't remember where she was. It's tough isn't it? Not being able to fix it for her. Anyway got a feeling I could be a regular on here so thought I'd come and say hi... hello everyone:)
 

DogMom

New member
Sep 15, 2019
2
0
Hi Kelly, I have just joined to (I’m Claire by the way - picked a stupid screen name, didn’t I ! ). My mum was just diagnosed a couple of weeks ago; and though it’s not a shock to us, it’s been some time since we began to suspect dementia, it’s still floored us. Us is myself and my father. Both Mum and dad are in their early 80’s, and dad is fit and very alert and active, But I am thinking about getting them practical support for daily life, Mum though is adamant she doesn’t want anyone coming into the house, to clean, bring the shopping etc etc... so it’s far from straight forward at present, even though they can readily afford help and it would benefit them both. Our story is likely going to be similar, so I thought I’d say hello. C x
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
24,920
0
South coast
Hello @Kellypc and welcome to DTP

Do have a mooch around and feel free to join in the conversations. This is a very supportive group and nothing is off limits
:)
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
E8E405C2-0CAE-4488-A913-DA5D5461DEB2.jpeg
Hi Kelly, I have just joined to (I’m Claire by the way - picked a stupid screen name, didn’t I ! ). My mum was just diagnosed a couple of weeks ago; and though it’s not a shock to us, it’s been some time since we began to suspect dementia, it’s still floored us. Us is myself and my father. Both Mum and dad are in their early 80’s, and dad is fit and very alert and active, But I am thinking about getting them practical support for daily life, Mum though is adamant she doesn’t want anyone coming into the house, to clean, bring the shopping etc etc... so it’s far from straight forward at present, even though they can readily afford help and it would benefit them both. Our story is likely going to be similar, so I thought I’d say hello. C x
Hello. Mum was formally diagnosed with Alzheimers and PCA (bensons syndrome) recently and is on medication. Shes still working but increasingly general day to day activities are becoming a struggle. She called me yesterday and said that for a few moments at work she couldn't remember where she was. It's tough isn't it? Not being able to fix it for her. Anyway got a feeling I could be a regular on here so thought I'd come and say hi... hello everyone:)

Hindsight is a wonderful gift that this forum gives you the chance to take advantage of, in the form of others experiences.
Really is in my case, do as I say not as I did!!!
I really didn’t handle situations well at times. Hindsight as I say is a wonderful thing.
At least with this forums help you can avoid some of the pitfalls, & have a wealth of experience & knowledge to dip into.
Much love to you both

Actually I like @DogMom - I totally get that
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,363
0
Kent
Welcome to Dementia Talking Point @Kellypc. You`ve found it at the best time, just soon after your mother has been diagnosed.

It`s not good news for either of you and it`s good you are trying from the beginning to try to find ways to help her.

I hope you find the forum helpful and supportive.
 

Kellypc

New member
Sep 14, 2019
7
0
Hi Kelly, I have just joined to (I’m Claire by the way - picked a stupid screen name, didn’t I ! ). My mum was just diagnosed a couple of weeks ago; and though it’s not a shock to us, it’s been some time since we began to suspect dementia, it’s still floored us. Us is myself and my father. Both Mum and dad are in their early 80’s, and dad is fit and very alert and active, But I am thinking about getting them practical support for daily life, Mum though is adamant she doesn’t want anyone coming into the house, to clean, bring the shopping etc etc... so it’s far from straight forward at present, even though they can readily afford help and it would benefit them both. Our story is likely going to be similar, so I thought I’d say hello. C x

Hi claire! Thanks so much for your response and sorry to hear we are in a similar boat... mums under 70 so reasonably young but over the last few months shes realising shes getting worse. Heartbreaking! Just trying to arrange some good times for her now. A nice holiday for me and her, meeting with old friends etc. Hooe to chat soon x
 

Kellypc

New member
Sep 14, 2019
7
0
Welcome to Dementia Talking Point You`ve found it at the best time, just soon after your mother has been diagnosed.

It`s not good news for either of you and it`s good you are trying from the beginning to try to find ways to help her.

I hope you find the forum helpful and supportive.

Thank you already people seem very supportive x
 

Kellypc

New member
Sep 14, 2019
7
0
Thank you! Really appreciate it x

Do have a mooch around and feel free to join in the conversations. This is a very supportive group and nothing is off limits
:)[/QUOTE]
 

Rosserk

Registered User
Jul 9, 2019
396
0
Hi Kelly

I’m pretty new here but the help and support has been amazing! Any queries I have are answered within minutes, where else could you get that type of service. Sending you a hug xx
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
I have staggered around struggling for years & wish I’d found & used this wonderful forum before I hit rock bottom!
Yep no subject off limits here & the honesty is amazing as our the people
x
 

Kellypc

New member
Sep 14, 2019
7
0
Hi claire. I like he screen name btw. Sorry to hear of your situation too, it's all a little bit **** isnt it? Just trying my best to create as many happy memories for mum that I can before she really deteriorates x
 

TattyT

New member
Oct 15, 2019
1
0
Hi Ladies, my Dad has been diagnosed with Early stage Alzheimers this year & I'm new here too. I think we’ll all have a lot of questions. Dad lives 90 mins from my sister & I in his own so we’re going to have to keep on top of things. Mostly word blocking & short term memory at the moment but he knows he’s getting worse.
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
Hi Ladies, my Dad has been diagnosed with Early stage Alzheimers this year & I'm new here too. I think we’ll all have a lot of questions. Dad lives 90 mins from my sister & I in his own so we’re going to have to keep on top of things. Mostly word blocking & short term memory at the moment but he knows he’s getting worse.

once I got a care package in place for Mum it became easier but it’s all swings & roundabouts!

I like to have contingency plans for my contingency plans!
It’s how I cope!!
Xx
 

Weemerseymac

New member
Nov 7, 2018
5
0
Hi everyone.
This is my first post here so hoping to get some moral support. Apologies if it's a bit long winded.
I am at my wit's end. My Mum who was diagnosed last Nov is pushing me to the limits (or maybe I'm just to sensitive). I moved in to care for Mum last September when Dad was hospitalised (he was then moved to a care home and died recently) My brother who lives 250+ miles away is no help. He is semi retired, works 3 days a week and visits once a month for 3 or 4 nights (I go back to my own home) and this is the highlight of my Mum's month. I've given up my job, as I was unable to cope caring for her 24hrs a day and going out to work (at a job I loved). I have arranged all sorts of social activities and visitors for her but still she finds fault with me. My brother has always been the blue eyes and she witters on to him and his new partner about all sorts. They are very much on the peripheral telephoning her 2 or 3 times a week. The only time they communicate with me is by email or text and it's only when they want something! The comments I've received when I've asked for help are 'well if you can't cope we need to get someone in who can'! I'm trying to save my Mum money so she has enough for a decent care home when the time arrives but I'm being made to feel incompetent especially as my background was in Social Care.
Oh there are a million things I would love to get off my chest but feel that's enough for now. This post was brought on by the fact my brother and partner are on their way north to see Mum and rang to say they were caught in traffic. Mum is on the phone telling partner that she had sore knees and 'no one' ( only me in the house) believes her!
Does anyone else feel taken for granted?
 

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
2,967
0
cornwall
Hi everyone.
This is my first post here so hoping to get some moral support. Apologies if it's a bit long winded.
I am at my wit's end. My Mum who was diagnosed last Nov is pushing me to the limits (or maybe I'm just to sensitive). I moved in to care for Mum last September when Dad was hospitalised (he was then moved to a care home and died recently) My brother who lives 250+ miles away is no help. He is semi retired, works 3 ays a week and visits once a month for 3 or 4 nights (I go back to my own home) and this is the highlight of my Mum's month. I've given up my job, as I was unable to cope caring for her 24hrs a day and going out to work (at a job I loved). I have arranged all sorts of social activities and visitors for her but still she finds fault with me. My brother has always been the blue eyes and she witters on to him and his new partner about all sorts. They are very much on the peripheral telephoning her 2 or 3 times a week. The only time they communicate with me is by email or text and it's only when they want something! The comments I've received when I've asked for help are 'well if you can't cope we need to get someone in who can'! I'm trying to save my Mum money so she has enough for a decent care home when the time arrives but I'm being made to feel incompetent especially as my background was in Social Care.
Oh there are a million things I would love to get off my chest but feel that's enough for now. This post was brought on by the fact my brother and partner are on their way north to see Mum and rang to say they were caught in traffic. Mum is on the phone telling partner that she had sore knees and 'no one' ( only me in the house) believes her!
Does anyone else feel taken for granted?
Yep! I don’t live with dad but I am at his 3days a week and then care for mum 1day a week and then I go home to mine for the other 3 days..
Like you I organise dads carers (used to do dads personal care but it got too much.He hardly weight bears) I also have a background of nursing and social care. I do his shopping cleaning etc..
Pity your brother and partner don’t do some more.(I’m an only child) Then he might not have so much to say!
I also gave up work to look after dad.I got fed up with the phone calls from carers.
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
Hi everyone.
This is my first post here so hoping to get some moral support. Apologies if it's a bit long winded.
I am at my wit's end. My Mum who was diagnosed last Nov is pushing me to the limits (or maybe I'm just to sensitive). I moved in to care for Mum last September when Dad was hospitalised (he was then moved to a care home and died recently) My brother who lives 250+ miles away is no help. He is semi retired, works 3 days a week and visits once a month for 3 or 4 nights (I go back to my own home) and this is the highlight of my Mum's month. I've given up my job, as I was unable to cope caring for her 24hrs a day and going out to work (at a job I loved). I have arranged all sorts of social activities and visitors for her but still she finds fault with me. My brother has always been the blue eyes and she witters on to him and his new partner about all sorts. They are very much on the peripheral telephoning her 2 or 3 times a week. The only time they communicate with me is by email or text and it's only when they want something! The comments I've received when I've asked for help are 'well if you can't cope we need to get someone in who can'! I'm trying to save my Mum money so she has enough for a decent care home when the time arrives but I'm being made to feel incompetent especially as my background was in Social Care.
Oh there are a million things I would love to get off my chest but feel that's enough for now. This post was brought on by the fact my brother and partner are on their way north to see Mum and rang to say they were caught in traffic. Mum is on the phone telling partner that she had sore knees and 'no one' ( only me in the house) believes her!
Does anyone else feel taken for granted?

Yes yes yes!!
To quote from when Harry met Sally !
I’m the butt of little jibes etc
so my lovely I smiled when I read your post- as I have nick named my husband golden balls - he can do no wrong & gets all the praise !
Meanwhile I’m the one at the rock face!!! Doing all the visits etc

gotta smile as I have found waterproof mascara doesn’t work & you end up looking like a panda.Um.... that’s given me a thought my mum likes pandas.....
 

Simon1965

New member
May 27, 2019
2
0
Hi Kelly I'm in the same position mum is 81 and has been very confused over the last few months first visited the GP back I May and was referred to memory service then had more memory tests and a scan and had a diagnosis of late onset alzheimer's on Tuesday although it ended up with me having to tell her after I spoke to the doctor so I'm looking for some advice on how to proceed They
are planning to start her on donezipil in the next couple of weeks
 

DesperateofDevon

Registered User
Jul 7, 2019
3,274
0
The clinical mental health team are a point of contact, along with the GP, social services & community nurses.
Try CMHT first & they should have telephone numbers & good advice