Hi. I am new to this forum as my dad has recently showed signs of confusion and it is being investigated, he went for his MRI this week. My question is how should I handle the situation that I find myself in. Basically dad retired 20 years ago but now believes that they rang him before Christmas offering him a new role and he has written to them, luckily I made him agree to let me look at any correspondence so I can check it for him as is aware he gets confused. When he first mentioned this letter I did explain to him that he had his timeline muddled and thought that was the end of it. However today he has asked me to go down and check his letter. How can I get it through to him that he is confused, do I explain again or just pretend to post the letter. Sorry for long post just really don’t know what to do. Thanks for any advice.
Help desperately needed. I am struggling as to how to handle my dads confusion
- Thread starter Tattytatoes
- Start date
You won't be able to reason with him . Time for love lies. Take the letter, tell him the address is no longer valid but you will try and find a new one. Then say you've found an email and will send one for him. Lo and behold....the email has bounced back as invalid. So, no way of contacting them. Or if you think it's too involved, just take letter and don't post it. Then tell him the firm have moved
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Thank you. As this is all so new I just didn’t what the best approach was. I think your right as I have tried to reason about other things and it doesn’t seem to get through. I just didn’t know if it would just encourage him, hopefully he will be satisfied once he believes he has contacted them.
Just saw your post @Tattytatoes It is very difficult to know how to respond when the PWD has such a difficult reality to yours. @Rosettastone57 gives you good advice, love lies. Something as simple as ‘yes, I’ll sort that tomorrow ‘, can work, with tomorrow never coming. Think I’m repeating advice given to me earlier today... round and round it goes, often easier to advise someone else than know what to do oneself, in the heat of emotion. Good luck! X
Keep it simple. Take the letter and pretend to post it. He may forget about it once that has been done. But if he remembers, you can say there has been no reply yet. Just go along with it as long as there is no detriment to him (i.e. it keeps him safe and happy). If he wants to do something more concrete, like take a trip to the firm, keep saying yes we'll go next week. I doubt he has much of a grasp on time now. People with dementia tend to live in 'now', and they have no concept of when tomorrow/next week actually arrives.
You might find this helpful - both for this situation and in general
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/
You might find this helpful - both for this situation and in general
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/
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