Feeling Overwhelmed

Smoothie

New member
Jul 15, 2019
1
0
I am new to DTP. My Dad diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia 3 years ago.

I feel selfish even complaining after reading some of the posts! I am finding it quite hard to cope as there seems to be no let up

My Dad lives with my Mum she had a triple stroke 7 years ago and is not very well herself. (She has Aphasia) Communication between them is difficult, my Mum lost her speech, it would be quite slurred and under stress finds it very hard to speak. She had years of recovery. They both have individual needs. We have home help of 12 hours per week. My sister and I are over with them most of the week. There is at least 2 hospital visits every fortnight and one of us attends with my Dad. We have been told he can no longer be left on his own in the house at all or go anywhere on his own. We had to tell him again yesterday that he has dementia which was very upsetting as he thinks he only has Parkinsons. He now thinks we are plotting against him preventing him from doing things. We have also been told that we need to build a bedroom downstairs as he is finding the stairs difficult.

I work full-time and my sister has 2 small children, I am finding it hard to keep going. It's all I think about because I know there is no solution, things are just going to get worse.
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Welcome to Dementia Talking Point, Smoothie. So many things for you and your sister to deal with, you should certainly not feel guilty. You are doing everything you can with home helps and visiting yourselves. https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/help-dementia-care/feelings-after-diagnosis-dementia contains some helpful information and links on anticipatory grief and the feelings that come with it.
I have found both counselling and CBT at different points to be helpful by talking about it and giving some coping strategies, but of course you can offload and find that support here any time.
 

Philbo

Registered User
Feb 28, 2017
853
0
Kent
Hi @Smoothie and welcome

A lot for you and your sister to deal with:(.

Sounds like you are both doing a great job caring for your parents - but you need to consider yourselves as well. The local authority will be only too pleased to let you all get on with it, so although it goes against your instinct, at some point you may need to let the LA know that you are not able to carry on your caring roles, due to the impact on your own well being? If you and your sister weren't around, the LA would have a duty of care to look after both of your parents.

Best wishes
Phil
 

Recent Threads

Members online

Forum statistics

Threads
137,807
Messages
1,990,202
Members
89,470
Latest member
knola28