Hello everyone
I would be interested to know if anybody has experienced difficulties with GP/Memory Clinic/Social Services
This is my second post on the forum in my first post I explained that my mum has mid stage dementia with no diagnosis as the GP/Memory Clinic have failed her..
For some brief context the outcome of the last visit to the Memory Clinic we were told that mum didn’t have dementia and they would see us in November - this was in March (2019)
Mums GP was in agreement that the memory clinic had let her down as mums presentations are indisputable.
GP had not offered other support and or route to a support/diagnosis.
GP HAS been seeing mum weekly now for the past couple of weeks which I attend with her.
Last weeks visit did not end well as I was accused of causing “conflict” by the GP.
I am fighting to get acknowledgement/ support for mum but this comes across as “conflict” when you ask direct questions regarding what is actually happen as I’m continually get “brushed off” with “things are happening in the background”?
Today mum received a call to say someone would be visiting this afternoon..
As mum is unable to process the exact conversation she did get the name of the woman due to visit and did say she was from the Memory C although, unfortunately I just can’t take for granted what she says as being fact and when it is fact I feel rubbish for doubting her...
So fast forward to this afternoon ...( I did wonder why this visit was on the “on the spur of the moment” bearing I mind I wasn’t quite sure who was coming ..)
When I answered my mums front door the woman (turns out she was a CPN) didn’t introduce herself and when I mentioned that initially it would have been better to call me and explain the inpending visit as the call from her has caused Mum agitation she said she didn’t have to call me and she’s here to see my mum...
She was not willing to tell me why she was making the visit or why another visit was being arranged for Thursday with a social worker ...it transpired that the GP had arranged with the memory clinic to send another CPN without any communication to us (the family) and the CPN was behaving like she was from the FBI no transparency, cold and lacking in any empathy to our circumstances.
As for social services mum is self funding and we have not asked for social services - we have been caught in a no-where loop with SS and don’t wish to revisit as they did nothing but “assessments”
Th GP has arranged it without informing us knowing how we feel about the lack of support from SS/MC
The hardiest thing to bare was that mum become completely agitated with the CPN’s arrival she took it out on me saying that I wasn’t her daughter (I now hear this all the time )and to get out, she swore and told me to **** off ( I know its the dementia but it’s so so hard to bare) especially when it was it front of a stranger who supposed to be “a professional” and she did nothing.
This is new first low - it feels so unjust on so many levels that I had to bear witness to my mum effectively turn on me it’s so isolating and desperate I’ve cried oceans..
It has come to light that the CPN has told the GP and they both are in agreement that I’m the problem and cause “conflict”
The irony couldn’t be greater as mums main carer I’m the one asking the questions and fighting the fight in a climate that isn’t listening and I’m being judged ...meanwhile my darling mum doesn’t even recognise the fridge as she couldn’t work out where her food was ...
And so it goes on....
I would be interested to know if anybody has experienced difficulties with GP/Memory Clinic/Social Services
This is my second post on the forum in my first post I explained that my mum has mid stage dementia with no diagnosis as the GP/Memory Clinic have failed her..
For some brief context the outcome of the last visit to the Memory Clinic we were told that mum didn’t have dementia and they would see us in November - this was in March (2019)
Mums GP was in agreement that the memory clinic had let her down as mums presentations are indisputable.
GP had not offered other support and or route to a support/diagnosis.
GP HAS been seeing mum weekly now for the past couple of weeks which I attend with her.
Last weeks visit did not end well as I was accused of causing “conflict” by the GP.
I am fighting to get acknowledgement/ support for mum but this comes across as “conflict” when you ask direct questions regarding what is actually happen as I’m continually get “brushed off” with “things are happening in the background”?
Today mum received a call to say someone would be visiting this afternoon..
As mum is unable to process the exact conversation she did get the name of the woman due to visit and did say she was from the Memory C although, unfortunately I just can’t take for granted what she says as being fact and when it is fact I feel rubbish for doubting her...
So fast forward to this afternoon ...( I did wonder why this visit was on the “on the spur of the moment” bearing I mind I wasn’t quite sure who was coming ..)
When I answered my mums front door the woman (turns out she was a CPN) didn’t introduce herself and when I mentioned that initially it would have been better to call me and explain the inpending visit as the call from her has caused Mum agitation she said she didn’t have to call me and she’s here to see my mum...
She was not willing to tell me why she was making the visit or why another visit was being arranged for Thursday with a social worker ...it transpired that the GP had arranged with the memory clinic to send another CPN without any communication to us (the family) and the CPN was behaving like she was from the FBI no transparency, cold and lacking in any empathy to our circumstances.
As for social services mum is self funding and we have not asked for social services - we have been caught in a no-where loop with SS and don’t wish to revisit as they did nothing but “assessments”
Th GP has arranged it without informing us knowing how we feel about the lack of support from SS/MC
The hardiest thing to bare was that mum become completely agitated with the CPN’s arrival she took it out on me saying that I wasn’t her daughter (I now hear this all the time )and to get out, she swore and told me to **** off ( I know its the dementia but it’s so so hard to bare) especially when it was it front of a stranger who supposed to be “a professional” and she did nothing.
This is new first low - it feels so unjust on so many levels that I had to bear witness to my mum effectively turn on me it’s so isolating and desperate I’ve cried oceans..
It has come to light that the CPN has told the GP and they both are in agreement that I’m the problem and cause “conflict”
The irony couldn’t be greater as mums main carer I’m the one asking the questions and fighting the fight in a climate that isn’t listening and I’m being judged ...meanwhile my darling mum doesn’t even recognise the fridge as she couldn’t work out where her food was ...
And so it goes on....
