So I’m new to joining this or any forum, but not new to avidly reading to gain any bit of insight or help from them over the years. Sound familiar?
So here I am with that horrid heart racing, bile in back of throat , continual headache & inability to function as a normal human being feeling that’s haunted me for almost a decade. Familiar ground I imagine for many who search through the forums when that rock bottom approaches as you plummet downwards.
Aged mother has undiagnosed dementia, recurring UTIs over the years that have only just lead to a hospital admission ( one month & counting) Now after having reoccurring UTI in hospital, ( Aged Mother been downing packets for cystitis for years!) suicidal thoughts & delusion, night time incontinence & urge incontinence ( this has all been ongoing for years) pneumonia - just finished treatment on Thursday when coincidentally she fell in hospital big bruise on head....... my aged parent is being discharged on Tuesday
Oh a care package ..yes 3 times a day
am/noon/tea
My husband ( I am to emotional- or so I am told! to be totally rational & not come across as mildly hysterical at times!!!! Really!!!! & breathe!) had a conversation with a nurse of authority shall we say who informed him that our aged relative is able to get out of bed, wash ,change their night clothes & bedding. Strange that Aged Mother was unable to do this 6 months ago let alone now with further cognitive deficiencies. Even stranger that nursing staff are still changing night clothes & bedding repetitively during the night in hospital.
But my life is weirder than that... oh yes friends .... if you’ve got this far in reading this post you are almost on my Christmas card list!!
On Thursday after being driven over the 125 miles ( each way!) to the hospital by my husband who didn’t finish work until 6:30pm ( sainthood in post!) I was greeted by staff ( yes I rang to ask if it was ok after hours to bring in clean washing) & informed by the lead nurse that she’d fallen & they suspected cause was TIA. Ah - not surprised as this has been happening a lot recently & yes hospital admission , GP informed. Infact it’s been going on for years ! She’s been through the fall clinic etc, & my Grandmother had exactly the same thing as did my Great Grandmother.
Reassured Aged Mother with big bump & bruise on head not being discharged anytime soon - nor the next week!
So the return journey home - (oh just to let you know folks my daughter drove me down the previous day to collect washing & visit Aged parent in hospital , & hubby soon to be saint did the Saturday driving to collect & deliver washing & visit. ) hubby & I we’re reassured that aged parent is in good hands
Imagine the next day receiving an email after office hours saying that same Aged Parent was going home on Tuesday!!
Another brief email if you can’t be there hospital transport will be provided!
Umm ... I’ve got the house keys, her purse & bag, plus we’ve cleaned out the fridge!!! It’s not like we haven’t told the hospital this or explained our situation
- I’m disabled & rely on others to take me on long distances
Plus I am self employed & working on this Fri/Sat/Sun with the aid of a support worker( hence hubby soon to be saint driving me & the clean laundry down!)
Hubby works during the week 200+ miles away
Daughter lives away & incidentally has a life of her own as she rightly should
So tomorrow I am working & mostly sleeping ditto Tuesday ( supposedly!) & Wednesday! How can I or my (soon to be ex) hubby ( if this situation doesn’t get resolved) be in two places at once?
Is it unreasonable to ask for a couple of days extension of care in hospital?
Ps
My aged father has Alzheimer’s & vascular dementia & was placed near me in a care home - Aged Mother wouldn’t allow anyone in to help him & wasn’t capable of feeding herself or him or giving him meds etc. Yes GP informed but Aged mother deemed competent by social services - What month is it? What is the queen called?
Ops I didn’t tell you Social services still deem her competent even though she has attacked neighbours & family verbally & physically, is found wandering not knowing where she is, has paranoia, delusions, hallucinations & has been deemed vulnerable by previous hospital admissions & won’t have tests done as is frightened of the results ! Our LPA might as well be used for toilet paper when we are cut short!!!
I need help & advice
Help!
So here I am with that horrid heart racing, bile in back of throat , continual headache & inability to function as a normal human being feeling that’s haunted me for almost a decade. Familiar ground I imagine for many who search through the forums when that rock bottom approaches as you plummet downwards.
Aged mother has undiagnosed dementia, recurring UTIs over the years that have only just lead to a hospital admission ( one month & counting) Now after having reoccurring UTI in hospital, ( Aged Mother been downing packets for cystitis for years!) suicidal thoughts & delusion, night time incontinence & urge incontinence ( this has all been ongoing for years) pneumonia - just finished treatment on Thursday when coincidentally she fell in hospital big bruise on head....... my aged parent is being discharged on Tuesday
Oh a care package ..yes 3 times a day
am/noon/tea
My husband ( I am to emotional- or so I am told! to be totally rational & not come across as mildly hysterical at times!!!! Really!!!! & breathe!) had a conversation with a nurse of authority shall we say who informed him that our aged relative is able to get out of bed, wash ,change their night clothes & bedding. Strange that Aged Mother was unable to do this 6 months ago let alone now with further cognitive deficiencies. Even stranger that nursing staff are still changing night clothes & bedding repetitively during the night in hospital.
But my life is weirder than that... oh yes friends .... if you’ve got this far in reading this post you are almost on my Christmas card list!!
On Thursday after being driven over the 125 miles ( each way!) to the hospital by my husband who didn’t finish work until 6:30pm ( sainthood in post!) I was greeted by staff ( yes I rang to ask if it was ok after hours to bring in clean washing) & informed by the lead nurse that she’d fallen & they suspected cause was TIA. Ah - not surprised as this has been happening a lot recently & yes hospital admission , GP informed. Infact it’s been going on for years ! She’s been through the fall clinic etc, & my Grandmother had exactly the same thing as did my Great Grandmother.
Reassured Aged Mother with big bump & bruise on head not being discharged anytime soon - nor the next week!
So the return journey home - (oh just to let you know folks my daughter drove me down the previous day to collect washing & visit Aged parent in hospital , & hubby soon to be saint did the Saturday driving to collect & deliver washing & visit. ) hubby & I we’re reassured that aged parent is in good hands
Imagine the next day receiving an email after office hours saying that same Aged Parent was going home on Tuesday!!
Another brief email if you can’t be there hospital transport will be provided!
Umm ... I’ve got the house keys, her purse & bag, plus we’ve cleaned out the fridge!!! It’s not like we haven’t told the hospital this or explained our situation
- I’m disabled & rely on others to take me on long distances
Plus I am self employed & working on this Fri/Sat/Sun with the aid of a support worker( hence hubby soon to be saint driving me & the clean laundry down!)
Hubby works during the week 200+ miles away
Daughter lives away & incidentally has a life of her own as she rightly should
So tomorrow I am working & mostly sleeping ditto Tuesday ( supposedly!) & Wednesday! How can I or my (soon to be ex) hubby ( if this situation doesn’t get resolved) be in two places at once?
Is it unreasonable to ask for a couple of days extension of care in hospital?
Ps
My aged father has Alzheimer’s & vascular dementia & was placed near me in a care home - Aged Mother wouldn’t allow anyone in to help him & wasn’t capable of feeding herself or him or giving him meds etc. Yes GP informed but Aged mother deemed competent by social services - What month is it? What is the queen called?
Ops I didn’t tell you Social services still deem her competent even though she has attacked neighbours & family verbally & physically, is found wandering not knowing where she is, has paranoia, delusions, hallucinations & has been deemed vulnerable by previous hospital admissions & won’t have tests done as is frightened of the results ! Our LPA might as well be used for toilet paper when we are cut short!!!
I need help & advice
Help!