Who has stolen my husband?

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
Dearest B,
I know, I really do. You know from my post Please Don't Throw me away how much I love my OH. But when I was caring for him at home, as you are your husband, he constantly called me a miserable bitch, told me he absolutely hated me etc etc. This totally changed after his accident and his admission to first hospital and then his nursing home. Within his limits he is gentle, concerned about me and loving. These aspects may still be there with your husband. I do not really understand what is happening to effect the profound change in my OH from aggressive to loving. I know his nursing home is exceptional, but the change happened before that, after his accident and when he was in hospital My only theory is that he could sense my fed upness with it all and felt like a trapped animal. That is just how it is being a sole carer. I was a trapped animal too. I think that when circumstances change, whatever that change may be, possibly they can change too. all my love, Geraldinexxxx
Thank you... you make so much sense.
I’m sitting here visualising you singing the Lonnie Donegan song, does your chewing gum lose its flavour....’ and those vivid pink sparkly sling backs. What a wonderful vision. You deserve such a good day with Keith, and May there be many more.
With my love, B xx
 

Mudgee Joy

Registered User
Dec 26, 2017
675
0
New South Wales Australia
Why does he get so aggressive with me?
And not with anyone else.
Why does he scream and shout at me?
For no reason that I understand.
Why won’t or can’t he hold a conversation with me.
When he will talk to his brother on the phone for half an hour, and it sounds so normal.
Why can’t or won’t he do that with me?
Why won’t he even answer me when we are in the car and I try to pass the time of day with him.
He just constantly ignores what I say.
So I give up.
The only time he talks to me is when it is about him.
He has no interest in me or my life at all.
I think he still loves me.
But it’s such a one sided life.
It drags me down....
such a lonely existence.
I think you should try phoning him !!! I did that once with my father and got a good result !
 

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
The house is ready for Lily, the little deaf young cat. I collect her tomorrow.
I think my husband is looking forward, but he is so unpredictable who knows. I don’t have long to wait.
I’ve emptied Amazon! Well... not quite, but nearly! She will have lots of things to stimulate her senses.
I’m like a child today, I can’t wait to collect her. I just hope she loves me as much as I already love her.
How can such a mature woman be so excited!
Love B xx
 

AliceA

Registered User
May 27, 2016
2,911
0
I know how dogs give unconditional love, we all need a bit of that! Hope she settles in well. X
 

kindred

Registered User
Apr 8, 2018
2,937
0
The house is ready for Lily, the little deaf young cat. I collect her tomorrow.
I think my husband is looking forward, but he is so unpredictable who knows. I don’t have long to wait.
I’ve emptied Amazon! Well... not quite, but nearly! She will have lots of things to stimulate her senses.
I’m like a child today, I can’t wait to collect her. I just hope she loves me as much as I already love her.
How can such a mature woman be so excited!
Love B xx
this
The house is ready for Lily, the little deaf young cat. I collect her tomorrow.
I think my husband is looking forward, but he is so unpredictable who knows. I don’t have long to wait.
I’ve emptied Amazon! Well... not quite, but nearly! She will have lots of things to stimulate her senses.
I’m like a child today, I can’t wait to collect her. I just hope she loves me as much as I already love her.
How can such a mature woman be so excited!
Love B xx
this is just so exciting! We could do with a Life with Lily thread on here!! all love, Gxxxx
 

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
5,259
0
High Peak
I'm another believer in cat therapy!

A year ago I was in a bad place - I'd just lost my beloved 14 year old chocolate Smoke kitty to arthritis and mum had just broken her hip. I knew I needed to put some joy back in my life so I returned to the lady who bred my last cat and chose Roly-Poly - the caramel Burmilla in my photo. A month later she called to ask if I could give a home to his older sister, Nico - she's a black Smoke.

So now I have two and they have made me so happy!

Hope Lily settles in well!
 

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
Thank you all so much for your posts.
Well, it isn’t even the end of day one yet...
What a difference half a day makes!
I know it’s very early to count any chickens but my husband seems to be besotted with her.
Lily is such a bright little thing. She is tiny. Obviously deaf, although she reacts to my husbands incredibly loud cough and sneeze! Why do men make so much noise when they sneeze? I just do a tschooo, all delicate and ladylike!
Already Lily has brought life into our home, she has made a difference.
I love her, my husband loves her, Lily is beautiful.
There is something special because she is profoundly deaf. It has brought me full circle for the work I loved with deaf babies, children and young people.
How lucky am I.... today.
Love B xx
 

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
5,259
0
High Peak
Thank you all so much for your posts.
Well, it isn’t even the end of day one yet...
What a difference half a day makes!
I know it’s very early to count any chickens but my husband seems to be besotted with her.
Lily is such a bright little thing. She is tiny. Obviously deaf, although she reacts to my husbands incredibly loud cough and sneeze! Why do men make so much noise when they sneeze? I just do a tschooo, all delicate and ladylike!
Already Lily has brought life into our home, she has made a difference.
I love her, my husband loves her, Lily is beautiful.
There is something special because she is profoundly deaf. It has brought me full circle for the work I loved with deaf babies, children and young people.
How lucky am I.... today.
Love B xx


Hello B, how lovely that your experiences working with the deaf are echoed again now with Lily. Any chance of a photo, please?

P.S. I've always wondered about the loud male sneezing thing too - I'm sure all that noise is unnecessary. You can hear my son from the next street... :rolleyes:
 

Janie M

Registered User
Jun 12, 2018
77
0
@Sad Staffs oh what a wonderful distraction ❤️ We look after our sons dog in the day while he's working, it really helps OH, and a much needed therapy for me! She gets us out during the day, even if it's for a slow walk! She also seems to know when OH is agitated, it helps
 

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Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
@Sad Staffs oh what a wonderful distraction ❤️ We look after our sons dog in the day while he's working, it really helps OH, and a much needed therapy for me! She gets us out during the day, even if it's for a slow walk! She also seems to know when OH is agitated, it helps
What a gorgeous German Shepherd. I love the breed, they are so loyal. My ex husband was a police dog handler so we have had a few. It sounds ideal.... on loan with little or no cleaning up. Just excellent therapy. Thank you for your post, love B x
 

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
B8EB8C41-CA56-438D-B10C-2262D64B42F6.jpeg
Hello B, how lovely that your experiences working with the deaf are echoed again now with Lily. Any chance of a photo, please?

P.S. I've always wondered about the loud male sneezing thing too - I'm sure all that noise is unnecessary. You can hear my son from the next street... :rolleyes:
A picture of Lily. She is such a little thing, 9 months and sits in one hand when she wants a cuddle. That sounds as though I have enormous hands, but I don’t!
I agree about the sneezing. He makes me jump when he coughs and sneezes, but surprisingly we know that Lily hears something when he does either! She doesn’t react to anything else! Amazing!
PS ... with all my experience I am still talking to Lily constantly, even though she can’t hear a word!
Love B x
 

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
I’m glad he likes the cat. Hope she settles in with no problems.
He loves her.... watches her, and he fed her this morning. She didn’t eat it, but he will try again tonight. He isn’t too happy about her keeping him awake most of the night with her amazingly loud meow. She needs a silencer fitted!
Hope you are ok?
Love B x
 

Sad Staffs

Registered User
Jun 26, 2018
696
0
this

this is just so exciting! We could do with a Life with Lily thread on here!! all love, Gxxxx
Life with Lily .... early days but she is a little treasure. So delicate, at least at the moment. She was vocal almost all night. I got up at 5 as we were both concerned at what she was getting up to in the bedroom we have turned into Lily’s room! She was sitting on the windowsill meowing and chattering at the many birds in the garden. So she came in to us. Then decided to use her litter tray meaningfully! Boy.... did I need to empty it! Phew!
So she has slept, watched birds, scratched settee (grrrr), slept, watched birds, scratched settee (grrr), you get the picture. And she is still sleeping. What does that mean? She won’t want any sleep tonight, and neither will we.
But.......... it’s so good to see my husband look at her, wonder where she is, and he has been smiling so much. So much more than usual. It’s lovely.
I’m happy today, not felt this way for so long.
I know it won’t last, but I’ll take it while I can, and deal with the rest when it happens.
Hope you are feeling more like your old, not that you are old!!, self Geraldine? Hope Keith has had a good weekend.
Thinking about you.
Much, much love, B xx
 

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