Personal care in Care Home

[ALFORD]

My wife who has had dementia for some 5 years, recently had a stroke and has niow entered residential care, She has not got the mental capacity to initiate nor undertake basic personal care activities (such as washing/showering, teeth cleaning, having her pads changed/ going to the toilet etc) without assistance

The Care Home staff approach her to undertake these activities in a kindly, calm, and friendly manner, offering every assurance

Sadly however, my wife responds on every occasion, by shouting/screaming at the helper in an aggressive manner and is totally unco-operative throughout the activity and of course ends up very upset.

To the credit of the helpers, they continue to provide help in an efficient and effective manner without losing their composure.

Within a short time after the task is completed, my wife calms down and forgets the incident and her behaviour

Can anyone suggest a strategy/strategies which might eliminate or at least reduce my wife's challenging behaviour in respect of personal care

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @alandford0 and welcome to posting on the forum.

I don't have experience of this situation but once read a case study where undressing a person for these reasons awoke bad memories from childhood and thus created the resistance. In that case they had to change the setting to one of a more clinical nature and wear uniforms so that the person felt it was less 'personal' and settled down.

I have read of other cases where the gender of the person giving the care was important or soft music was played to calm the person.

It's also important to avoid any embarrassment to the person. I know this is a huge factor with my wife when she has accidents.

Here's a link to the Society Publications list, where you may find something of use
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

I hope that you can find a solution.

 

[Rolypoly]

How long has she been in the home? I only ask because my mum was/is the same, shouting out, crying and hitting out during personal care. The staff are very good, remaining calm throughout and I know they explain everything they are about to do or are doing. Gradually, as mum is beginning to settle a bit more into the home, her behaviour has improved as agitation and anxiety have slightly lessened. She still has challenging behaviour at those times and I think she may always find personal care upsetting, but the carers know how to handle this and keep upset to a minimum. I know ther are medications that may help. Mum has been prescribed medication for agitation which can be given if and when needed.

If your wife hasn’t been at the home long then things may improve as she settles in. I know it’s not nice to see or hear a loved one so upset. Maybe have a chat with the carers and see what their thoughts are.