Fronto-temporal dementia

[lilypat]

Hi so glad to hear you have had a better few days . We don't go away for another couple of months .it was our first time away since diagnosis. I wanted to see how he would cope in a different environment. .
Here's to a good night and plenty of sleep .

 

[Jackimags]

Hi so glad to hear you have had a better few days . We don't go away for another couple of months .it was our first time away since diagnosis. I wanted to see how he would cope in a different environment. .
Here's to a good night and plenty of sleep .

Hi so glad to hear you have had a better few days . We don't go away for another couple of months .it was our first time away since diagnosis. I wanted to see how he would cope in a different environment. .
Here's to a good night and plenty of sleep .

oh well I need to be thankful for 2 good days but paying for it today! Thinks it’s sunday yet again. He has a “man bag” which has been packed and unpacked about 20 times. Wallet opened and closed. Diary in and out of bag looking at the wrong week and getting VERY cross when I tell him he’s looking at the wrong week. Dreading this evening as it always gets worse from about 5pm. That’s my moaning out of the way- how has your day been? We went to a cognitive therapy group this morning. It’s a 14 week course but not sure it’s going to improve things. You can’t put back what’s no longer there. If I hear the zip on that bag once more I think I will scream!!!

 

[lilypat]

Oh dear ,,sorry to hear this is not good .we need the patience of saints ....I totally understand what you mean ....yet when we tell someone about it they never really truly understand.
It's the noise of pound coins been counted from one hand to the other that grates .on me and those seemly innocent questions that when we don't give them the answer they want ..
OH has asked 4 times in last 5 mins if we have enough money for when we go out tomorrow! , after he has taken his 3 £5 notes out of his wallet and counted them again he thinks its Friday tomorrow (if only ) I could do with a short working week .
I started writing this reply to you over 2 hours ago ..? So hopefully you are coping with him and that dreaded Zip. Just had a message from SIL asking how OH was so I did not hold back ...but now I feel that when they visit ?? He will come over not as I said he was .. . Let me know how things are going thinking of you

 

[Maryland]

Hi Jackimags
Your so right in the becoming a
Parent bit ..it's all put your shoes on ,take your coat off etc etc .
It's the lack of empathy that's hard after 30 years of joint laughter and doing things together he just sits and just looks at the tv not me when I cry ...with no questions..
I shouted at him the other day can't think why now but no reply or even a hurt look on his face it seemed to just fly over his head .
Why did he seem to act normal when we have a friend down for coffee (total time of 1 hour) then act totally different for the rest of the day ,,,,so said friend later phones and says he seemed ok to him !!
Are you sure he is ill .?

Hi lily pat. You put my thoughts into words exactly, he just sits and I have to tell him which coat shoes etc to wear !!! We had a lovely day out and then he starts ranting when it gets to about 6 - checking if I have locked up etc and looking for two pairs of everything to go to bed in, oh well tomorrow is another day, xx

 

[Maryland]

oh well I need to be thankful for 2 good days but paying for it today! Thinks it’s sunday yet again. He has a “man bag” which has been packed and unpacked about 20 times. Wallet opened and closed. Diary in and out of bag looking at the wrong week and getting VERY cross when I tell him he’s looking at the wrong week. Dreading this evening as it always gets worse from about 5pm. That’s my moaning out of the way- how has your day been? We went to a cognitive therapy group this morning. It’s a 14 week course but not sure it’s going to improve things. You can’t put back what’s no longer there. If I hear the zip on that bag once more I think I will scream!!!

Hi jack image - you made me laugh about the man bag. My OH has a man bag (wash bag) which if anything is missing I always look in there first, it’s usually a razor spare socks etc, kitkats and this morning a mug and a pint of milk. OMG thought it was just me, he doesn’t have money or keys now (he like the queen) I gradually took them off him as he was either giving them away or losing them, he has had his rant for the night as it has gone quiet will have to go and look the see what he is doing, take care, thanks for the laugh - it doesn’t take much lately, x

 

[Jackimags]

Hi jack image - you made me laugh about the man bag. My OH has a man bag (wash bag) which if anything is missing I always look in there first, it’s usually a razor spare socks etc, kitkats and this morning a mug and a pint of milk. OMG thought it was just me, he doesn’t have money or keys now (he like the queen) I gradually took them off him as he was either giving them away or losing them, he has had his rant for the night as it has gone quiet will have to go and look the see what he is doing, take care, thanks for the laugh - it doesn’t take much lately, x

Keys cause the biggest problem in the house..he insists on having a set in his pocket so if he is in the loo and someone comes to the door ime stumped. I’ve started having a set on a lanyard round my neck. They have all got a “locator “ on-best £10 I’ve spent. He never has more than a £5 note in his wallet and def no cards!! He has a habit of moving things from their usual place and then we spend a couple of hours the next day looking for them- and find them in the strangest places. Do you find your OH is VERY OCD? He always has to have the same beaker, cutlery has to be laid perfectly in the drawer etc..Oh well time to hit the bed and look forward to 3hrs freedom when our lovely Carer comes in the morning x

 

[Jackimags]

Oh dear ,,sorry to hear this is not good .we need the patience of saints ....I totally understand what you mean ....yet when we tell someone about it they never really truly understand.
It's the noise of pound coins been counted from one hand to the other that grates .on me and those seemly innocent questions that when we don't give them the answer they want ..
OH has asked 4 times in last 5 mins if we have enough money for when we go out tomorrow! , after he has taken his 3 £5 notes out of his wallet and counted them again he thinks its Friday tomorrow (if only ) I could do with a short working week .
I started writing this reply to you over 2 hours ago ..? So hopefully you are coping with him and that dreaded Zip. Just had a message from SIL asking how OH was so I did not hold back ...but now I feel that when they visit ?? He will come over not as I said he was .. . Let me know how things are going thinking of you

Keys cause the biggest problem in the house..he insists on having a set in his pocket so if he is in the loo and someone comes to the door ime stumped. I’ve started having a set on a lanyard round my neck. They have all got a “locator “ on-best £10 I’ve spent. He never has more than a £5 note in his wallet and def no cards!! He has a habit of moving things from their usual place and then we spend a couple of hours the next day looking for them- and find them in the strangest places. Do you find your OH is VERY OCD? He always has to have the same beaker, cutlery has to be laid perfectly in the drawer etc..Oh well time to hit the bed and look forward to 3hrs freedom when our lovely Carer comes in the morning x

 

[leensa44]

My 71 year old husband was diagnosed with Fronto-temporal dementia last year after many months of various tests and scans. As this type of dementia is untreatable we have been discharged by the consultant and by the memory service as, basically, there is no treatment available. Fortunately the GP practice we belong to has an Admiral nurse who we see about every 3 to 4 months. We go to various memory cafes, which is lovely, but I never get to speak to other carers dealing with FTD as most of the people there have Alzheimers or vascular dementia and the symptoms are very different. I have enquired about support groups for FTD and the nearest to South Yorkshire is Manchester!! It would be great if there is someone on the Forum who is a carer for FTD loved one.

 

[canary]

People with FTD have so many problems with decisions that they need their routines in order to get through the day.
OH usually gets up, comes downstairs and makes himself a cup of coffee, puts his meusili in his bowl and goes and sits in the conservatory. One day I was in the kitchen when he came down making myself a pot of tea, so I automatically made his coffee for him. It disrupted his routine and totally de-railed his thought patterns. He stood there for ages simply holding an empty mug and couldnt get any further. It taught me why he insisted that everything is done in exactly the same way at exactly the same time.

 

[lilypat]

Oh dear mmm keys yes we have had to put those away we have 1 for the door and that's it car keys are in my bag at all times .we have 2 wallets 1 with small amount of money in and his best 1 which up to now we only take out -in my bag - as that's got his bank card in .he is getting forgetful about how to use the machine but not his pin number .
So we go to town and get money then its popped away and he has a small amount incase he goes out with BiL
It's the same with breakfast he now just needs prompting u know how it goes ...now tea bag ... now jam etc etc .
He does not seem to have OCD in fact everything is just left where he dropped it coat shoes etc .

 

[lilypat]

Aahh why oh why did I mention in passing that the car at top of street was for sale !!! If he says 1 more time we don't need a new car ... I may just go and buy it lol....
I only mentioned it to make conversation.@Jackimags what is a a cognitive therapy.

 

[potter77]

Is the speech therapist trying to get him to re-learn words that he has forgotten?
If so, Im afraid that it will be doomed to failure as you cant re-learn things that have been forgotten with any sort of dementia.

My OH is losing words and I get him to describe the word that he cant remember - its called circumnavigation. eg long furniture with cushions that you sit on - a sofa!

 

[Jackimags]

Aahh why oh why did I mention in passing that the car at top of street was for sale !!! If he says 1 more time we don't need a new car ... I may just go and buy it lol....
I only mentioned it to make conversation.@Jackimags what is a a cognitive therapy.

It’s supposed to stimulate the brain but I have my doubts of its success. Yesterday we were listening to music and seeing if we could name the song. I am not sure you can stimulate what’s not there. The times I make an innocent comment about something and then regret it for the rest of the day. I bought my OH a ring for his 21st birthday and when on his finger it’s a bit loose now but hard to get on and off because his knuckle has arthritis. So he decided he wanted it making smaller so it wouldn’t move on his finger..No way could I convince him that if he had it made smaller he wouldn’t be able to get it on over his knuckle. In the end my daughter took the ring to her house for a week, told dad she was taking it to the jewellers to see what they could do and brought it back the following week and told him that because it was so old they couldn’t do it. The lies are all in a good cause. You’ll have to say the car has now been sold!!!

 

[Jackimags]

Did what we don’t usually do this evening and went to a friends for a meal. OH was 80% fine. Left there about 9pm and the switch flicked on and he was all over the place. No sentences made any sense, moving things, making drink after drink, up and downstairs etc etc. The ‘host mode’ had certainly come into play cos as we left our friends she said “he seems fine tonight “ I should have brought them home with me!!! Having said all that it was lovely to have conversation over a meal which I do miss

 

[lilypat]

Did what we don’t usually do this evening and went to a friends for a meal. OH was 80% fine. Left there about 9pm and the switch flicked on and he was all over the place. No sentences made any sense, moving things, making drink after drink, up and downstairs etc etc. The ‘host mode’ had certainly come into play cos as we left our friends she said “he seems fine tonight “ I should have brought them home with me!!! Having said all that it was lovely to have conversation over a meal which I do miss

@Jackimags
So glad you went out and had a nice time ...its amazing this host mode thing sure is strange .
Hope he did not keep the up and downing etc up too long and soon settled down .
After a late night does he sleep in next day ?

 

[lilypat]

Hi lily pat. You put my thoughts into words exactly, he just sits and I have to tell him which coat shoes etc to wear !!! We had a lovely day out and then he starts ranting when it gets to about 6 - checking if I have locked up etc and looking for two pairs of everything to go to bed in, oh well tomorrow is another day, xx

@Maryland it's like having a child again and the number of times I get asked where is this and where is that !!!
Up to now we are ok with what he wears just seems not to recognise fronts from back or inside out etc .
The other day he showered again while I was at work ....with his docks on ...sent me a text !!! I had to ring him and go through it all on phone ...you are dressed? You have put dry socks on ? You have turned shower off ,? Etc my work colleague said go down home and check but I resisted. All was ok thank God..

 

[lilypat]

@Jackimags
OH has one of those electric day/date clock Here is my home made easy to transport day date chart (the date and day just for example) when we were away for the weekend he kept asking about the day /date
So I am going to do the whole two weeks and tear off the days.

 

[lilypat]

 

[Jackimags]

View attachment 60578

What a good idea. We too have one of the electric day date clocks - although he sometimes argues with it!! Lovely day here and OH going out with a daycare company that has a couple of mini buses and takes clients out for the day usually into Derbyshire for a pub lunch. Pick him up about 10 and home about 5. So ime off for some retail therapy. He slept till he woke me up at 7 this morning x

 

[Jackimags]

@Jackimags
OH has one of those electric day/date clock Here is my home made easy to transport day date chart (the date and day just for example) when we were away for the weekend he kept asking about the day /date
So I am going to do the whole two weeks and tear off the days.

Well I might have had a stress free day but think ime going to suffer for it this evening!! Nothing has been right since he got home. Hadn’t got a cup of tea ready when he arrived home. Tea was rubbish. No doubt we’ll start moving things anytime now so ime determined to keep my mouth closed and let him get on with it. Won’t be easy. Looking at radio times for guess what day. You got it - Sunday!! Will probably be cross any minute now because the right programmes aren’t on the tele. Soon be bedtime!!!