What should I do?

[tryingmybest]

I haven't posted for over a month or so. Mum lives with me and is steadily declining, eating and drinking less and less. I called the doctor out on Tuesday as thought she had a stroke as her mouth was a funny shape when I woke her, and I couldn't get her out of bed. She seemed weaker than ever and although hasn't talked for nearly 3 years was trying to talk, but nothing I could understand. Doctor gave her some antibiotics incase she had a uti (she has them every few months) and said she couldn't find anything wrong. She said it maybe her mouth is dry from the amitriptilene she was prescribed 5/6 weeks ago. These were prescribed to help with her mood as she was always crying and to help her sleep. I've actually had a few nights uninterrupted sleep with her so I do now think they are finally helping but not particularly with her crying less.

I got her up and dressed on Wednesday and took her to the garden centre as she was brighter, but then in the afternoon she became aggitated and nasty with me and eventually I got her back in bed. She wouldn't do anything I asked of her, not drink, eat, take her tablets etc and was constantly talking gibberish. Thursday was much the same then Friday at 1am, I heard a clonk and got up and tried to open my bedroom door to find Mum collapsed between my door and her frame. She's had several of these funny turns in the past and if shes hit her head and been unconscious I call an ambulance. As she was only out for a couple of minutes I didnt call 999 but managed to lay her on the floor. As always with these turns she became very clammy was sick and had explosive diarrheoa. I've wondered if these are TIAs but medical professionals don't seem to know but everytime she has one she gets worse in herself. Eventually I got her cleaned up and back into bed.

She's still in bed now continually chatting away to herself but I can't understand her. I've tried to get her to eat little bits and pieces but shes only had a banana and a biscuit since Wednesday. She's so shakey she can' t hold a cup so I tried to get her to drink with a straw but she can't manage it so has scarcely drunk anything, although she's had a few sips of water just now. She can hardly weight bear as shes so shakey and I don't know whether she has an infection going on or has developed parkinsons (which her brother had) or what is wrong. I've spent the last 2 nights pretty well up with her all night and am exhausted. I think she's got delerium as talking to photos and her teddy bear.

I can't bear to see my Mum like this and it's breaking me. I don't know what to do. If it wasn't the weekend, I'd call the doctor out again. I don't think calling for an ambulance is the right thing as in January she went in and kept pulling out the canula and climbing out of bed and was so distressed. I feel I should keep her here in familiar surroundings. What does anyone else think?

Previous 2 posts for info
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/posts/1599178/
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/posts/1603560/

 

[Beate]

Call out of hours or 111.

 

[Rosettastone57]

I haven't posted for over a month or so. Mum lives with me and is steadily declining, eating and drinking less and less. I called the doctor out on Tuesday as thought she had a stroke as her mouth was a funny shape when I woke her, and I couldn't get her out of bed. She seemed weaker than ever and although hasn't talked for nearly 3 years was trying to talk, but nothing I could understand. Doctor gave her some antibiotics incase she had a uti (she has them every few months) and said she couldn't find anything wrong. She said it maybe her mouth is dry from the amitriptilene she was prescribed 5/6 weeks ago. These were prescribed to help with her mood as she was always crying and to help her sleep. I've actually had a few nights uninterrupted sleep with her so I do now think they are finally helping but not particularly with her crying less.

I got her up and dressed on Wednesday and took her to the garden centre as she was brighter, but then in the afternoon she became aggitated and nasty with me and eventually I got her back in bed. She wouldn't do anything I asked of her, not drink, eat, take her tablets etc and was constantly talking gibberish. Thursday was much the same then Friday at 1am, I heard a clonk and got up and tried to open my bedroom door to find Mum collapsed between my door and her frame. She's had several of these funny turns in the past and if shes hit her head and been unconscious I call an ambulance. As she was only out for a couple of minutes I didnt call 999 but managed to lay her on the floor. As always with these turns she became very clammy was sick and had explosive diarrheoa. I've wondered if these are TIAs but medical professionals don't seem to know but everytime she has one she gets worse in herself. Eventually I got her cleaned up and back into bed.

She's still in bed now continually chatting away to herself but I can't understand her. I've tried to get her to eat little bits and pieces but shes only had a banana and a biscuit since Wednesday. She's so shakey she can' t hold a cup so I tried to get her to drink with a straw but she can't manage it so has scarcely drunk anything, although she's had a few sips of water just now. She can hardly weight bear as shes so shakey and I don't know whether she has an infection going on or has developed parkinsons (which her brother had) or what is wrong. I've spent the last 2 nights pretty well up with her all night and am exhausted. I think she's got delerium as talking to photos and her teddy bear.

I can't bear to see my Mum like this and it's breaking me. I don't know what to do. If it wasn't the weekend, I'd call the doctor out again. I don't think calling for an ambulance is the right thing as in January she went in and kept pulling out the canula and climbing out of bed and was so distressed. I feel I should keep her here in familiar surroundings. What does anyone else think?

Previous 2 posts for info https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/posts/1603560/

My mother-in-law was like this last summer during the heatwave. She was very reluctant to eat and drink and couldn't weight bear. I called 111 and eventually she went into hospital. She eventually went into care , not that I'm saying that should happen in your case. No magic answers I'm afraid.

 

[Shedrech]

hi @tryingmybest
you are on your own with your mum in what sounds to be a challenging condition - I appreciate that hospital is not an ideal place for your mum to be, but if it's necessary … home may be familiar to her, but having her home means that you are having to cope alone and exhausting yourself
please call 111 at least and explain exactly what's happening

 

[buttercups]

Hello tryingmybest, how did you get on with your mum? Have you still got her at home? Is her eating any better.
I hope things are going ok for you. I'm in a similar position, my mum lives with me and my husband and we've been through hell this last year. Her agitation and sleep pattern being awful. But at least I have my husband to help me. You're doing a great job. I know how very hard it is.

 

[tryingmybest]

Hello tryingmybest, how did you get on with your mum? Have you still got her at home? Is her eating any better.
I hope things are going ok for you. I'm in a similar position, my mum lives with me and my husband and we've been through hell this last year. Her agitation and sleep pattern being awful. But at least I have my husband to help me. You're doing a great job. I know how very hard it is.

Thank you Buttercup for enquiring. Mum landed up in hospital (I need to do an update on a separate post about that as her treatment was horrendous) but she is back home again now. Still not eating much but drinking ok so we are plodding on. She's sleeping a lot more and not so keen to go out, so I must admit I'm feeling a bit trapped at the moment. It's so tough isn't it? I hope things are a bit better with your Mum now? X

 

[buttercups]

Thank you Buttercup for enquiring. Mum landed up in hospital (I need to do an update on a separate post about that as her treatment was horrendous) but she is back home again now. Still not eating much but drinking ok so we are plodding on. She's sleeping a lot more and not so keen to go out, so I must admit I'm feeling a bit trapped at the moment. It's so tough isn't it? I hope things are a bit better with your Mum now? X

 

[buttercups]

I think our mums are at a similar stage. My mum is just now starting to not eat as much and needs to reminded to drink. She's getting tired during the day but her agitation won't allow her to sleep. The confusion is unbelievable. God help us through this....x

 

[tryingmybest]

I think our mums are at a similar stage. My mum is just now starting to not eat as much and needs to reminded to drink. She's getting tired during the day but her agitation won't allow her to sleep. The confusion is unbelievable. God help us through this....x

Ahh bless you. I've had a horrendous morning with Mum. Then this afternoon as she seemed better, I took her out to Dunelm, and bought her a nice new quilt and pretty duvet set and cushions to go with her new electric bed I got last week. Tonight we have more of this mornings tantrums plus when I tucked her up in her newly made up bed, she retorted I mean nothing to her. Don't know whether to cry or scream the place down at the mo. How much more do we have to take? Xx