Oh dear....in hospital and combative

[charlie10]

I think I'd already posted that FiL had a fall and went to hospital with a broken hip last weekend (if I haven't, sorry....not sure if I'm on my head or my heels at the moment). He had a visitor shortly after his op, who found him in good spirits, then the same visitor went back a couple of days later and was disappointed to find he'd slipped back a bit....was hallucinating a bit and rambling, but they still had a conversation and FiL said he was comfortable and being well looked after.

Then a day later BiL visited and was told by his dad that 4 nurses had held him down and beaten him up, and he wanted the police called. He had cuts and bruises all over his arms......apparently he had been found tightly entangled with a couple of his tubes and put up a fight when they tried to remove them, hence the 4 staff. He also pulled out his cannula, and the 'manhandling' damaged his fragile skin. He has someone sitting by his bed to keep an eye on him.

He has also been keeping the other patients in his ward awake at night with his talking, and is refusing his meds. And he has now decided that BiL is on the side of the abusive staff and set his face against him. Apparently the DR doesn't think it's delirium, but is working on the theory it's his morphine ....no-one has mentioned the other 'D' word (he's not been diagnosed or even seen a dr with that in mind as far as we know, and sometimes we wonder if we're jumping to conclusions)

My husband wants to' talk' to someone who has an overall view of him.....so far we understand that the drs he's seen are specialists....skin/cardiac etc and we've found it virtually impossible to phone internationally even at a time suggested when a dr would be on rounds....never managed to speak to anyone who knows anything Would it be a good idea to email the PALS dept and ask them if they could find out anything/pass on an email to an appropriate dr from my husband? We don't have LPA....that was still a work in progress, but BiL doesn't want to try to talk to someone, says his brother would be better at it!

Also if anyone has any suggestions/insight into what's happening I'd be very grateful. He also has a 'chest infection'.....maybe hospital acquired but he may have had it when he went in ....so many things going on you could stick a pin in a list and find something possible

 

[Louise7]

Apparently the DR doesn't think it's delirium, but is working on the theory it's his morphine

It could be that he isn't being given enough pain relief, or that morphine is causing the problems. It's a case of 'trial & error' to find the right pain relief so they should be closely monitoring your FIL for pain and considering alternative pain relief if necessary. Any sort of infection can cause chaos so that won't be helping. The ward consultant should have an 'overall view' of what's going on. If you have been trying to get through to the ward but not been successful then it's worth a try to email PALS, explain that you are abroad and would like to speak to the consultant who is treating your FIL but are having difficulty in getting through to the ward. Some hospitals, consultants and PALS teams are better than others so you may or may not get a response. Ideally your BIL should be speaking to them but if that's not an option then all your husband can do is to keep trying to contact the ward. From experience the consultants tend to go on their rounds first thing in the morning so you could try ringing at around 9.30hrs UK time.

 

[Sirena]

My mother briefly got a bit feisty when she was in hospital, a few days after the hip op. She pulled her drip out repeatedly so they couldn't give pain relief that way, and had to give it by suppository - which was even less welcome of course, and she kicked a carer who tried to do this. None of this is surprising. It must be terrifying when you have no idea why you are in hospital or what is happening. If FIL has an infection too this will inevitably exaggerate his behaviour. Hopefully this will be temporary.

 

[love.dad.but..]

Purely down to dad's stage of dementia but he was always very agitated feisty and frightened whenever in hospital...doing all the things you have reported. I stayed in with him to try to minimise the distress but no getting away from having to hold him down for crucial treatment ...taking bloods...having catheter fitted...or bandaging a cannula in place for essential iv drugs and fluids and still having to physically stop him from ripping at it. I don't think I will ever get over it but it was necessary and in his best interests. The look of a frightened child looking at me for reassurance and to stop I will never forget. Perhaps as has been mentioned infection is increasing his agitation.

 

[charlie10]

@Louise7 , @Sirena and @love.dad.but.. - thank you for your replies, it makes us feel as if we're not just sitting on our hands doing nothing when I can talk on the forum

Was hoping for an update this morning as BiL was going in to see him, but we've had no replies to messages asking if we can phone and soon it will be bedtime in England. My husband is extremely worried as we have no other source of info (apart from my dad, and I can't expect him to go to the hospital every day at 93). Having read of the strain on carers, even if they're not hands on, we try not to overload him with demands for reports on FiL, but it is hard not knowing.

I think the best thing will be to email PALS and explain the situation and see what they can help with. Time zones and lack of LPA do not help! Thank you for sharing your experience, I don't need to tell you how helpful it is.....and I hope that it doesn't revive painful memories for you