Fear of the toilet

[Alex54]

My OH tells me she needs to go to the toilet, but as soon as she sees the toilet she runs a mile.
I have tired making the toilet room more personal and appearing, but it has not done the trick.

The end result if she does not go, gets frustrated and becomes grumpier.

How has anyone else had this problem - I was thinking about trying a room air freshener even although the room does not need one.

 

[Beate]

Might it be a perception problem? You could try a red toilet seat as it sometimes helps to make things stand out, and red is a good colour for that.

 

[Malalie]

........or you could try the reverse, and empty the room completely apart from the essentials. She could be seeing something in there - a hanging robe, a picture, a fancy loo roll cover? that she's perceiving to be threatening and scary. I hope you can find something that works.....

 

[Casbow]

Might it be a perception problem? You could try a red toilet seat as it sometimes helps to make things stand out, and red is a good colour for that.

I was told at some point during my husband's dementia journey that it is now thought that white baths, showers, and toilets can really frighten some people with dementia. My husband refused to bath or shower and then the worse of all, sit on the toilet. No way would he sit on it. If I were you I would try a coloured toilet seat. Or pattened. Don't know if they are easy to buy but if all else fails paint the one you have got. It was the start of my husbands double incontinence and ultimately he had to go into a nursing home as he would not let me help him. I hope this helps.x

 

[Terry Towelling]

I am having the same issue with toileting and we are now almost completely doubly incontinent. My OH just will not use the toilet. Our toilets have wooden seats and lids and my wife would go into the toilet and put the lid down rather than use it. I have removed the lid now. Perversely, she then started lifting the seat so that only the white porcelain shows - then she definitely won't use it. I have now fixed the seat to stop her doing that.

In the earlier days of these problems I found that she would use the loo at night with very low light levels but not in the day. Now she won't use it at all.

She holds on to her stools for up to 5 days - despite laxatives given sparingly - and then messes herself with a smallish amount. Often after the first mess, she will then go to the loo and do some more properly if I am very insistent.

I have also noticed how her cognitive abilities decline as the days pass with no poo. Once she's got it moving she becomes more lucid (but not much these days).

Thinking of trying cannabis oil to hopefully remove some of the anxieties that may exist. I'm also told that the oil can improve memory - we'll see. Anyone else have any knowledge of cannabis oil?

 

[Rosebush]

I am having the same issue with toileting and we are now almost completely doubly incontinent. My OH just will not use the toilet. Our toilets have wooden seats and lids and my wife would go into the toilet and put the lid down rather than use it. I have removed the lid now. Perversely, she then started lifting the seat so that only the white porcelain shows - then she definitely won't use it. I have now fixed the seat to stop her doing that.

In the earlier days of these problems I found that she would use the loo at night with very low light levels but not in the day. Now she won't use it at all.

She holds on to her stools for up to 5 days - despite laxatives given sparingly - and then messes herself with a smallish amount. Often after the first mess, she will then go to the loo and do some more properly if I am very insistent.

I have also noticed how her cognitive abilities decline as the days pass with no poo. Once she's got it moving she becomes more lucid (but not much these days).

Thinking of trying cannabis oil to hopefully remove some of the anxieties that may exist. I'm also told that the oil can improve memory - we'll see. Anyone else have any knowledge of cannabis oil?

My son has suggested I give my husband cannabis oil, but I don't know what to do as my daughter doesn't think it's a good idea without asking the GP first.

 

[Duggies-girl]

I would be scared to give it to dad but I have a friend who will share the occasional spliff with me and I do mean occasionally.

It just makes me sleep very well.

 

[canary]

You cant buy cannabis oil over the counter - the CBD oil you buy in places like H&B is made from Hemp.
I have bought some for OH and use it in cooking, but it hasnt made any difference, in fact the deterioration has got worse recently (im sure thats not the reason).

 

[Terry Towelling]

I would be scared to give it to dad but I have a friend who will share the occasional spliff with me and I do mean occasionally.

It just makes me sleep very well.

We're not talking about smoking dope because that contains many chemical compounds; we're referring to CBD which is a specific chemical element from the plant.

I understand that the stuff you can buy is so low in concentration it's more or less just homeopathic and any effect is likely to be placebo.

I have a friend with Parkinson's and dementia and the doctor has agreed to prescribe. The beneficial effects have included improved memory.

 

[Terry Towelling]

You cant buy cannabis oil over the counter - the CBD oil you buy in places like H&B is made from Hemp.
I have bought some for OH and use it in cooking, but it hasnt made any difference, in fact the deterioration has got worse recently (im sure thats not the reason).

As far as I am aware, CBD is a chemical compound that exists in hemp, marijuana or cannabis (whatever you want to call it) but it is still CBD. It is (as you say) down to the concentration level as to whether it has any effect and I am told it needs to be far above the levels in the substances you can buy in the health food shops. I've spoken to the district nurse so far and will move on to the doctor next.

 

[Duggies-girl]

Sorry and I am aware that you are not talking about smoking dope and I would not recommend that anyone does.

I have seen claims that cannabis oil can help with Parkinsons and other conditions but that would not be any cannabis oil that you could just buy, it would be a whole lot stronger and would have to be prescribed and I can see difficulties with that.

You could try the over the counter stuff but it is probably just oil with little of the active ingredients.

 

[canary]

I am told it needs to be far above the levels in the substances you can buy in the health food shops. I've spoken to the district nurse so far and will move on to the doctor next.

There are very strict guidelines about what things GPs can prescribe cannabis oil for and AFAIK, they can only prescribe it in UK for MS and children with certain types of epilepsy

BTW, I wasnt sure from your reply if you were aware that hemp is a different (although related) plant to cannabis.

 

[Shedrech]

hi @Alex54
is there a mirror, or window, near the toilet - your OH may be seeing her reflection and thinking there's someone already in the bathroom

my dad actually became so constipated that he was blocked up, won't go unto details, and it definitely increased his confusion - he was prescribed lactulose to take daily which helped, so maybe have a word with your GP

 

[claursen]

hi @Alex54
is there a mirror, or window, near the toilet - your OH may be seeing her reflection and thinking there's someone already in the bathroom

my dad actually became so constipated that he was blocked up, won't go unto details, and it definitely increased his confusion - he was prescribed lactulose to take daily which helped, so maybe have a word with your GP

Which CBD did he use?

 

[Gpolli]

My husband has of with lewy bodies,he would not go into the toilet convinced the walls were glass and the floor flooded,I wad advised it was shiny surfaces,worse in artificial leather light, worrying and frightening as he can't be talked round,I have to stand in front and lead him in, but not always successful,