I've been lurking here for many years so I feel I know you all! I have learned so much from TP and always look here for help with my problems.
My story could be any of yours - mum has been in a care home for 2 years following a crisis. She has mixed dementia and I'd say she is at the late middle/heading towards late stage. On the whole I am very happy with the care she receives, however.... recently mum's jewellery has disappeared. There was a gold necklace with a small pendant and a chunky heavy gold bracelet. She wore these 2 items all the time, i.e. they were never taken off for bathing, etc. Mum is definitely not capable of removing either piece herself. Unfortunately this means that one of the staff has nicked them.
I have reported it, the place has been turned upside down, the manager is both sorry and sad that she has a member of staff she can't trust. I don't blame the CH - I don't see how things like this can be prevented and 'policy' is of course to remove any valuables yourself. I get that but it's mum's home not a prison and she liked wearing her jewellery. Obviously whoever took it would have done so while there were no witnesses so nothing can ever be proved - I don't even know exactly when the items went missing, as I only visit twice a week so it may have been a week or even more before I noticed. (She wears long sleeves/high necked tops so it wouldn't be obvious.)
I know care home staff are poorly paid and mum can be pretty unpleasant during personal care. It's easy to imagine someone thinking the theft was almost justified, merely 'payback' to that mean old woman. I know we will not get the jewellery back. (Sad for me - the bracelet matches my own necklace and was promised to me for many years!) But the worst thing is that I no longer trust any of the staff because I know one of them is the thief. Some have been extra nice to me ('Oooh, that's terrible! Who would do a thing like that?'), one said 'We think we know who it was,' and a couple have been a bit 'off' with me - I know the manager has questioned them all.
In the end, it is a small thing. But I can't help thinking that if someone could be callous enough to take advantage of an old lady with dementia, what else might they do while no one is watching?
My story could be any of yours - mum has been in a care home for 2 years following a crisis. She has mixed dementia and I'd say she is at the late middle/heading towards late stage. On the whole I am very happy with the care she receives, however.... recently mum's jewellery has disappeared. There was a gold necklace with a small pendant and a chunky heavy gold bracelet. She wore these 2 items all the time, i.e. they were never taken off for bathing, etc. Mum is definitely not capable of removing either piece herself. Unfortunately this means that one of the staff has nicked them.
I have reported it, the place has been turned upside down, the manager is both sorry and sad that she has a member of staff she can't trust. I don't blame the CH - I don't see how things like this can be prevented and 'policy' is of course to remove any valuables yourself. I get that but it's mum's home not a prison and she liked wearing her jewellery. Obviously whoever took it would have done so while there were no witnesses so nothing can ever be proved - I don't even know exactly when the items went missing, as I only visit twice a week so it may have been a week or even more before I noticed. (She wears long sleeves/high necked tops so it wouldn't be obvious.)
I know care home staff are poorly paid and mum can be pretty unpleasant during personal care. It's easy to imagine someone thinking the theft was almost justified, merely 'payback' to that mean old woman. I know we will not get the jewellery back. (Sad for me - the bracelet matches my own necklace and was promised to me for many years!) But the worst thing is that I no longer trust any of the staff because I know one of them is the thief. Some have been extra nice to me ('Oooh, that's terrible! Who would do a thing like that?'), one said 'We think we know who it was,' and a couple have been a bit 'off' with me - I know the manager has questioned them all.
In the end, it is a small thing. But I can't help thinking that if someone could be callous enough to take advantage of an old lady with dementia, what else might they do while no one is watching?