Without a trace

northumbrian_k

Volunteer Host
Mar 2, 2017
4,418
0
Newcastle
My wife was in a jolly mood after her visit to the chiropodist this morning. He'd endured her repeated stories about tap dancing and being asked about his hair colour with his customary patience. The queue at Cafe Nero was out the door so we decide to skip coffee and get the metro home. She walked a few paces behind me as she usually does. Then, suddenly, just like on the TV, I turned to speak to her only to find that she was gone. There was not a trace as I searched up and down busy Northumberland Street so I telephoned 999 and reported that a vulnerable person with advanced dementia had gone missing.

An officer soon arrived and as he took details a 'high risk' search began. After retracing our route with him we returned home so that I could find a photo of her. By this time PCs and PCSOs were searching in the city centre, at metro stations and in the vicinity of our home. A CCTV image of her was found, timed just about when she went missing. We circulated a recent photo. Shortly afterwards, about 3 hours after she first went missing, she was found asking for me in Marks and Spencers and brought home safely.

A happy ending after a relatively short but anxious time. I can't praise too highly the officer who first attended and am very grateful for his and his colleagues' efforts. From our conversation I am certain that he learned more about the scope and peculiarities of dementia - and the limitations it imposes - than he thought possible. As for my wife, her adventure is forgotten already but I'll need to be doubly vigilant next time we are in the city.
 

Beate

Registered User
May 21, 2014
12,179
0
London
Oh that brings back memories. OH and I were walking along the Northern Line platform to get to the DLR. I turn round and he is gone - he'd hopped on the train! I couldn't find an officer underground so had to get on the DLR to get somewhere with phone reception. At Canary Wharf I alerted the police, and at some point the Northern Line went overground and OH answered his mobile. He returned to the original station where police somehow found him and brought him to me. That taught me to never walk in front again!
 

Baker17

Registered User
Mar 9, 2016
3,382
0
This used to happen with my husband luckily I always had a feeling that he wasn’t behind me so was able to get him back walking with me, I now link him all the time so as he can’t ‘escape’
 

AliceA

Registered User
May 27, 2016
2,911
0
I am glad all ended well, how worrying at the time. Enjoy the next few days with no more drama. Xxx
 

dancer12

Registered User
Jan 9, 2017
498
0
Mississauga
My wife was in a jolly mood after her visit to the chiropodist this morning. He'd endured her repeated stories about tap dancing and being asked about his hair colour with his customary patience. The queue at Cafe Nero was out the door so we decide to skip coffee and get the metro home. She walked a few paces behind me as she usually does. Then, suddenly, just like on the TV, I turned to speak to her only to find that she was gone. There was not a trace as I searched up and down busy Northumberland Street so I telephoned 999 and reported that a vulnerable person with advanced dementia had gone missing.

An officer soon arrived and as he took details a 'high risk' search began. After retracing our route with him we returned home so that I could find a photo of her. By this time PCs and PCSOs were searching in the city centre, at metro stations and in the vicinity of our home. A CCTV image of her was found, timed just about when she went missing. We circulated a recent photo. Shortly afterwards, about 3 hours after she first went missing, she was found asking for me in Marks and Spencers and brought home safely.

A happy ending after a relatively short but anxious time. I can't praise too highly the officer who first attended and am very grateful for his and his colleagues' efforts. From our conversation I am certain that he learned more about the scope and peculiarities of dementia - and the limitations it imposes - than he thought possible. As for my wife, her adventure is forgotten already but I'll need to be doubly vigilant next time we are in the city.
Hi:

I can only imagine the stress & panic you must have felt & the fear she must have gone threw. I try to keep my husband ahead of me but that doesn't last long as he walks so slow now and I can't go that slow even if I walked backwards. Glad she's found & is okay. Look at it positively she wasn't injured and was found safe, she is now on your & the polices radar.
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,730
0
Ireland
Gosh @northumbrian_k , what a terrible fright you must have got! I'm so glad that your wife was found so quickly, but I'm sure it felt like an eternity at the time!
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,455
0
Kent
It`s a shock when it happens for the first time. It`s so easily done. I`m so pleased all ended well.
 

MothersCarer

Registered User
Nov 13, 2014
72
0
My imagination is running riot about how you must have felt but how wonderful to have the support you did. I do think people who don't know a person with dementia are beginning to learn just a little of how it can be. I do hope you have a peaceful night and a good day tomorrow.
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
74,005
0
72
Dundee
I can just imagine your panic @northumbrian_k. Your description brought back sharp memories for me. Like you I found the police incredibly helpful and supportive. I hope you have a calm and peaceful day today. Oh yes! Merry Christmas to you both.
 

nestle

Registered User
Jul 22, 2016
80
0
Southwest but Yorkie by birth
Hello, how frightening for you and glad you got a good response from the police and she is home safe.
One of my concerns is that my OH will go 'missing' . Have you heard about 'Herbert's Protocol' or in my area it is called 'stay safe' it is where a vulnerable person is pre registered with the police so that if they do 'vanish' you have got a head start with finding them. It would be worth checking if there is a similar scheme in your area . The admiral nurse at UK dementia .org told me about it . Though as some one else said at least she on the radar now. With my OH I link arms with him if busy and tell him 'stay close' but that might not work for everybody . wishing you as peaceful a Christmas as possible
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,455
0
Kent
Hello @northumbrian_k

I had a pet tag engraved with my husband`s name and contact phone number on one side and the fact he had diabetes and dementia on the other side. It was on his key ring which he always carried whether he was with me or not.
 

northumbrian_k

Volunteer Host
Mar 2, 2017
4,418
0
Newcastle
Have you heard about 'Herbert's Protocol' or in my area it is called 'stay safe' it is where a vulnerable person is pre registered with the police so that if they do 'vanish' you have got a head start with finding them.

Thanks @nestle I have heard of the Herbert protocol and looked some time ago to see if my local force used it, which they don't. I asked the officer yesterday and he had never heard of it. I did fill in one that I got from North Yorkshire but, as Northumbria don't use the protocol, it was of little use. The recent photo that I supplied was of most use but meant coming home to find it on my computer. I'll make sure that I have one on my phone in future, which will give quicker access should such a thing happen again.
 

northumbrian_k

Volunteer Host
Mar 2, 2017
4,418
0
Newcastle
Hello @northumbrian_k

I had a pet tag engraved with my husband`s name and contact phone number on one side and the fact he had diabetes and dementia on the other side. It was on his key ring which he always carried whether he was with me or not.

That sounds like a really good idea @Grannie G as my wife always has her keys in her handbag (though usually buried amongst toilet paper and other detritus).
 

nestle

Registered User
Jul 22, 2016
80
0
Southwest but Yorkie by birth
Good idea about the recent photo Northumbrian-k and I like the key ring idea Grannies G
Think I'll get both . I got him an emergency ID to wear but it's always going missing . Shame the police don't keep a data base in your area Northumbrian k .