diary of a frustrated coventrian!

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
When the chap did mums central heating he set it so that it is on most of the time and mum controls it by the thermostat
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Yesterday's visit to mum to escort her up the road for her flu jab.
I arrived to a very smelly house as she had burnt her dinner and was tidying it up. She said it was because she had gone upstairs to get some bedding , then decided she didn't want it so put it back. And while doing all this her dinner burnt.
I am hoping it's a one off, though the worried daughter has gone in to overdrive. When I went midday, there was always the smell of prepared food but it's been missing recently .
Then we had the search for the missing glasses which we did not find. Then I offered to cook the chicken I had bought Friday . She said she was saving it for my sister's visit at the weekend, but it would have been green by then.
Ten minutes into the cooking she decided it would be ready soon and I told her at least another hour. She repeated this twice within 10 minutes. I think she was hungry.
Left her tucking in to the meal and sad to say got home and got drunk. Still suffering badly for my sins today.
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,242
0
Cotswolds
Yesterday's visit to mum to escort her up the road for her flu jab.
I arrived to a very smelly house as she had burnt her dinner and was tidying it up. She said it was because she had gone upstairs to get some bedding , then decided she didn't want it so put it back. And while doing all this her dinner burnt.
I am hoping it's a one off, though the worried daughter has gone in to overdrive. When I went midday, there was always the smell of prepared food but it's been missing recently .
Then we had the search for the missing glasses which we did not find. Then I offered to cook the chicken I had bought Friday . She said she was saving it for my sister's visit at the weekend, but it would have been green by then.
Ten minutes into the cooking she decided it would be ready soon and I told her at least another hour. She repeated this twice within 10 minutes. I think she was hungry.
Left her tucking in to the meal and sad to say got home and got drunk. Still suffering badly for my sins today.
Oh dear, your Mum sounds quite confused @try again :(
Do you think she’s safe cooking now? It sounds as though burning things is a risk but also perhaps not eating enough / eating out of date food. This takes a lot of monitoring.....does she have any care visits?
All the best
Lindy xx
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
No there's only me at the moment. I spend half my time thinking l'm over reacting. Will just keep doing what I do and monitor
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Memory clinic this afternoon. Took 3 hours. Mum kept insisting I was my sister, the oldest daughter. She knew it was Monday and it seems not much else. Hated having to give examples of her forgetfulness in front of her.
Now we wait 4-6 weeks for the home visit with the conclusions.

I know it's a memory clinic but I was surprised that physical symptoms were not discussed very much.
 
Last edited:

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Still waiting on feedback from memory clinic , it's been a month now.
Went to see mum today to take her for a hospital appointment to find her on the floor, she fell out of bed last night. She is fine, the ambulance have been and got her sorted and checked . She has a bruise developing on her face. Have arranged for a home visit as we were going to pop up to see the nurse about her legs looking nasty. So she is currently dozing while I sort out bedding etc.
We have rebooked to get her landline reconnected so that she can use her alarm pendant as she promised the ambulance ladies she would (not holding my breath ). But I have ordered internet and will look into home monitoring systems.
It was lucky I was due today, and came early to organise the nurse appointment. Lucky also the heating was up fairly high though she said she was cold.
That damn bed, was worried the bed was too small being a single and have been dreading this happening.
 

Shedrech

Registered User
Dec 15, 2012
12,649
0
UK
hi @try again
your poor mum - as you say thank goodness you arrived
I hope the rest of the day is much less eventful for you both to be more settled
 

Canadian Joanne

Registered User
Apr 8, 2005
17,710
0
70
Toronto, Canada
@try again I think you might want to start looking around at nursing homes now, while you can do it in a calm manner. If you wait until things get desperate, it will be much harder on you. My sister and I started looking around fully a year prior to having to move Mum.
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Woke her up just before one so she could watch mass on TV. She said she needed a wee and went into her bedroom to use the commode which she never does during the day.
After the mass had finished, I went to empty it and she had also pooed . So she hadn't cleaned herself. She said the ambulance people had ( they did wash the overnight urine from her) and sort of understands that she must have done it but can't remember
She still does not remember how she came to be on the floor. I did wonder whether she had tripped as there was a soaking pad on the floor by the door and wet trousers the other side of bed.
I am hoping this is the shock and not a concussion.
We still await the doctor and as I have not been able to shop we have dined finely on instant mash and baked beans .
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,242
0
Cotswolds
Hi @try again
Each time my mum fell at home, she had no idea how it happened. In fact on one occasion, when the paramedics arrived, she was still on the floor but fiercely believed she was sitting in her chair.....Its so difficult to know whether it's dementia, or an infection, or a trip, or even a TIA, that causes a fall :(
I hope your mum improves and that you are able to get some help with her care.
All the best
Lindy xx
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
My poor mum had to go to the Dr in the end. Then we had to wait as he 'didn't know we were there'.
Ab, ab creme , folic acid and new water tablets .

Staying overnight. She has once again tried to put eye drops up her nose while being adamant that she knows they go in her eyes. I truly dispair.
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,242
0
Cotswolds
My poor mum had to go to the Dr in the end. Then we had to wait as he 'didn't know we were there'.
Ab, ab creme , folic acid and new water tablets .

Staying overnight. She has once again tried to put eye drops up her nose while being adamant that she knows they go in her eyes. I truly dispair.
I’m sorry to hear this @try again :( I hope you get some rest tonight.
Lindy xx
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Another day, another fall.
Stayed with mum wednWedne and thursday night. I had to go to my dementia trial thing Friday afternoon so rushed out for that. Sister at mum's yesterday so popped in for the afternoon. Phoned at 11 last night . She phoned me at 9, had fallen over and crawled to phone. Currently awaiting ambulance to help get her up.
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Well got back from hospital. They are keeping her in and giving her antibiotics Iv. We got there around 10.30 and processed fairly quickly in a+e then transferred around midday to a clinic called amu assessment medical unit. Here she stayed on the trolley until we were told in the afternoon they would keep her in. At 11pm she was still on a trolley waiting for a bed. While she went to the Loo they swapped it for a bed and promised me she would soon be taken to a ward. Apparently once in amu, there is no clock so obviously a+e get beds by priority to meet their targets. She was alone in the ward when I left but the two nurses said they would look after her. So at least I am now home and tired. I kept telling everyone she had dementia and they all professed to be hearing it for the first time and write it in her notes.
Anyway, I've had enough. Night all!
 
Last edited:

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
Mum came out of hospital yesterday with her course of antibiotics, two a day. I've written on a piece of paper the next 8 days with 10am and 10pm. She kept checking over and over this morning.
After a fraught 8 days for me, I was glad to run home this morning.
Started to look at monitoring systems then got cross with myself as I need to switch off from it all.
I printed off details of a sheltered housing flat, as she has (again) been talking of moving. She now accuses me of being desperate to move her out of her own home.
At this moment I don't care what she does. But I am sure come Saturday when I do her shopping I will be in a better frame of mind.
Talking of frames, the one she promised the physio she would use is now standing lonely in the corner of the room. I laugh as when he said to me, see she has promised , I pointed to my face and said ''does this look convinced'.
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,242
0
Cotswolds
So sorry to hear things are so difficult @try again :(
I do so recognise the phenomenon of the frame. Mum too was issued with one and managed to convince Physio and OT that she'd use it. She not only emphatically never used it, she actually hid it in the bedroom. She had falls too :eek: Hope your mum's better soon or else some support for you can be arranged.
Lindy xx
 

try again

Registered User
Jun 21, 2018
1,308
0
So sorry to hear things are so difficult @try again :(
I do so recognise the phenomenon of the frame. Mum too was issued with one and managed to convince Physio and OT that she'd use it. She not only emphatically never used it, she actually hid it in the bedroom. She had falls too :eek: Hope your mum's better soon or else some support for you can be arranged.
Lindy xx
They also wanted her to have a toilet frame to help her. Another laugh, when I explained to them the one she was given was dismantled and stored upstairs behind the walking frame and next to the alarm system I got her last year. :(
 

Staff online

Forum statistics

Threads
138,861
Messages
2,000,672
Members
90,626
Latest member
IBTC