Worn out and worn down.

Rey61

Registered User
Mar 23, 2017
14
0
My MIL is deteriorating. She had a fall a few weeks back and this seems to be accelerating her condition.

Initially she couldn't have a shower because she was in pain. We had great difficulty in obtaining OT assistance but eventually managed through a cancellation to have her assessed for a shower seat. Yesterday she was keen enough to have a shower and the carer obliged. She shouted and screamed that she was cold (the heating was on, the water was warm enough, the seat had had the warm water put on it before she sat down). She started to shiver and shake and this only stopped after the shower. Has she become frightened of the water hitting her skin? Is it becaùse she has got out of the habit? As she has a number of "accidents" of both varieties in the coùrse of the day, we are worried that this could be the start of refusing showers.

On a different topic, we are so worried about her having to go into a home. The farm in which my husband is a business partner is still in my MIL's name... Everything he has worked for could go up in smoke. He is not sleeping... His elder brother has absolved himself of any responsibility (he lives in England while we are in NI). Continuing Health Care is not common here - 17 cases between 2006 and 2013. She has had heart failure, has arrythmia, glaucoma, COPD, frozen shoulder (precipitated by fall), evidence of a TIA apart from Alzheimer's. Frankly, I don't know how much more of this my husband can take... he resolutely refuses to see a doctor and be "put on pills"...
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
Hello @Rey61, sorry to read about your current difficulties.

It's true that some people with dementia can become afraid of the rush of water from an overhead shower. A hand held shower can sometimes work better. The complaints about the temperature may be temperature related, so that should always be checked, however, they could also just be an expression of general anxiety etc. If you click on the following link you will reach a Factsheet that contains some hints about this issue https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/media/8266

It may be worth asking for a reassessment of needs to see if some extra care may be available to keep your MiL independent at home. The following link will take you to a Society Factsheet about the system in NI https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/media/8286