Moving PWD (in later stages) to new care home?

[looviloo]

I have another thread about moving my dad from his current care home to another (more suitable) one. This is a slightly different question and something that is worrying me...

Does anyone have experience of moving their loved one, with mid to late stage dementia, from one home to another? Did it cause confusion? How much? What was the overall effect on their health?

My dad cannot speak so won't be able to verbalise his worries, the way he did three years ago when he first moved into care. I'm feeling very anxious, especially about this aspect of it and wondering if anyone else has been through this?

 

[Grannie G]

I moved my mother in the later stages and it was a very successful move.

My mother`s face was expressionless and she was unable to communicate. However the atmosphere in the home and the general feelings I had, including the welcome from all members of staff at all times, gave me the confidence to feel assured I`d done the right thing.

 

[looviloo]

I moved my mother in the later stages and it was a very successful move.

My mother`s face was expressionless and she was unable to communicate. However the atmosphere in the home and the general feelings I had, including the welcome from all members of staff at all times, gave me the confidence to feel assured I`d done the right thing.

Thanks, happy to hear your mum's move was a successful one. Dad was distressed by his first move three years ago, but much more aware at the time. It's probably just about finding the right place to move to

 

[Grannie G]

Good luck . I hope your dad will accept the move and you will feel less anxious.

 

[Shedrech]

hi @looviloo
I haven't such experience
I can't help thinking, though, that if you believe the move is of benefit and therefore you appear more relaxed and positive, your dad may well pick up on your demeanour and take on your feelings himself

 

[looviloo]

hi @looviloo
I haven't such experience
I can't help thinking, though, that if you believe the move is of benefit and therefore you appear more relaxed and positive, your dad may well pick up on your demeanour and take on your feelings himself

Yes, I'm sure you're right.... which is probably a good reason for me to stay away on moving day!!! I'm only half joking when I say that because I have mixed feelings about it and wouldn't want to make things worse for him. I'll have to see how I'm feeling at the time ;-) x

 

[Witzend]

We've had to move two relatives - an aunt from an ordinary residential home to a dementia one. We were very worried about the move, but TBH she barely seemed to notice it, and the new home was lovely.

We had to move my FiL from an ordinary residential home, where somehow they'd managed to cope with him extremely well even into what was probably late-middle stage dementia - in other words, he was pretty bad. Having developed health problems he had to go to a nursing/dementia home. He didn't particularly seem to notice it much either, and did not seem distressed by it.

 

[Amy in the US]

I can only relate my experiences of moving my mother.

First, she moved directly from hospital (the US version of sectioning for 10 days) to a care home near me, 100 miles from where she had been living alone. That move was difficult, to say the least. She was in the "assisted living" section of a care home that also has a dementia ward/memory care unit.

Then about a year and a half later, we moved her to the dementia ward, on the advice of the staff at the care home, and also prompted by a safeguarding incident. The staff went out of their way to make the move as smooth as possible and concocted a great story about her other room being flooded due to a broken water pipe. We effected the transfer of her furniture and clothing and so on, while she was out of the facility, so that she came back to the new room all set up for her.

To my surprise, she accepted this right away and never asked me about her previous room, her other belongings, or mentioned the move at all. Looking back, she was farther along than I thought, or wanted to think, and likely couldn't really understand.

It helped that the care home arranged for her best friend to move at the same time, and to the room next door. Again, looking back, she really benefited from being placed in the dementia unit as the smaller rooms, open floor plan, and increased staff and structure were what she needed.

I would say that she was somewhere in the middle to the end of the middle stage when we moved her to the dementia unit, as she is now somewhere towards the beginning of late stage. She is still verbal, but often not communicating clearly, and is completely disoriented to time and place most of the time.

I don't feel that either move caused a downturn of any sort, or increased confusion beyond what was already present. My mother's health improved significantly when she first moved into her care home, as she wasn't safe at home alone and wasn't able to take care of herself.

I don't recall the particulars of your situation, but if you need to undertake a move to obtain the right level of care, or the right kind of care, or the right situation or location, those are all good reasons. I don't mean it should be undertaken lightly, but we do what we have to do.

A quote I like from the US Alzheimer's message board is "care needs drive the decision making." I am sorry I cannot credit the author, but it's a good reminder that we often have to make the choices for what the person with dementia needs, and not what any of us want, or would have wanted. Also, it can work out. Very minor niggles aside, I've been extremely happy with the care home and the care my mother receives. My only regret is not moving her there sooner.

Hope you're able to work it out and best wishes.

 

[looviloo]

We've had to move two relatives - an aunt from an ordinary residential home to a dementia one. We were very worried about the move, but TBH she barely seemed to notice it, and the new home was lovely.

We had to move my FiL from an ordinary residential home, where somehow they'd managed to cope with him extremely well even into what was probably late-middle stage dementia - in other words, he was pretty bad. Having developed health problems he had to go to a nursing/dementia home. He didn't particularly seem to notice it much either, and did not seem distressed by it.

Thanks, I'm glad it went well in both cases for you. I'm already steeling myself for 'move day', but hopefully it's just my anxiety and dad will be more relaxed about it than I will!

I can only relate my experiences of moving my mother.

First, she moved directly from hospital (the US version of sectioning for 10 days) to a care home near me, 100 miles from where she had been living alone. That move was difficult, to say the least. She was in the "assisted living" section of a care home that also has a dementia ward/memory care unit.

Then about a year and a half later, we moved her to the dementia ward, on the advice of the staff at the care home, and also prompted by a safeguarding incident. The staff went out of their way to make the move as smooth as possible and concocted a great story about her other room being flooded due to a broken water pipe. We effected the transfer of her furniture and clothing and so on, while she was out of the facility, so that she came back to the new room all set up for her.

To my surprise, she accepted this right away and never asked me about her previous room, her other belongings, or mentioned the move at all. Looking back, she was farther along than I thought, or wanted to think, and likely couldn't really understand.

It helped that the care home arranged for her best friend to move at the same time, and to the room next door. Again, looking back, she really benefited from being placed in the dementia unit as the smaller rooms, open floor plan, and increased staff and structure were what she needed.

I would say that she was somewhere in the middle to the end of the middle stage when we moved her to the dementia unit, as she is now somewhere towards the beginning of late stage. She is still verbal, but often not communicating clearly, and is completely disoriented to time and place most of the time.

I don't feel that either move caused a downturn of any sort, or increased confusion beyond what was already present. My mother's health improved significantly when she first moved into her care home, as she wasn't safe at home alone and wasn't able to take care of herself.

I don't recall the particulars of your situation, but if you need to undertake a move to obtain the right level of care, or the right kind of care, or the right situation or location, those are all good reasons. I don't mean it should be undertaken lightly, but we do what we have to do.

A quote I like from the US Alzheimer's message board is "care needs drive the decision making." I am sorry I cannot credit the author, but it's a good reminder that we often have to make the choices for what the person with dementia needs, and not what any of us want, or would have wanted. Also, it can work out. Very minor niggles aside, I've been extremely happy with the care home and the care my mother receives. My only regret is not moving her there sooner.

Hope you're able to work it out and best wishes.

Thank you Amy, that's very reassuring, and I think dad might cope with the move better than I'm imagining. My thoughts are tainted by the distress he suffered when moving to hospital and then into care three years ago. Like your mum, he found it very difficult. But he is much further along the dementia pathway now, and there's really no telling how he'll react.

He did move room some time ago, but because his current care home is very small I don't think he really noticed! So that move went smoothly <phew>. This next one... well, I'm hoping he'll see it as a kind of holiday, and then soon forget about his previous home. Fingers crossed.

I love the quote you gave, it is SO true. I worry so much about my getting things right for dad, and sometimes forget that the cause of it all, the dementia, is outside our control. x

 

[Dearie Me]

Hi, I feel for you - we were in this position about a year ago. Mum had been in a lovely residential home for three years, but her needs had changed, and they were finding it harder to give her the care she needed, and keep her safe, particularly overnight when she wandered regularly. Although they were still willing to try, I could see the way Mum was deteriorating, and started looking around for alternative homes. We were well supported by the current home and our care manager, and unexpectedly found another local home which I was very impressed by from my first visit. The staff, from the manager to housekeeping, are lovely.
Mum moved in October last year, she was brought to her new home by two staff from her existing home, and we all had tea and cake. I had brought most of her belongings earlier that day - at this stage we kept it to her clothes and some familiar pictures. Anything else would have been for me, rather than for her benefit.
Mum settled immediately. As Amy in the US said of her mum, she was even further along than we realised.
What this brought home to me was that we had probably waited longer than we should have to make this move - Mum now has more freedom to wander safely (her new unit is purpose built rather than a converted building), and the better staff ratios and smaller unit give her more security. This shows no disrespect to her previous placement - it was right for her until her needs changed.
I hope it all goes well for you and your dad.