Hi @margherita thank you ,no we never got to see her. She knew no different though with having dementia . Hope you keeping well. How’s your OH . Today OH has Dr app about his bloods been borderline don’t know what they will be giving him now to take. Well I think our Summer is over we back to cool weather Autumn is definitely upon us. My friend & x work colleague asked me if I would like to go away for a few days with her so we booked in September to go to Barcelona only for 4nights. The family have said they will see to OH . I take my opportunities while I still can. We just never know when all could change . Speak soon margherita take care my friend. Axxx
Grumpy OH
- Thread starter Beads
- Start date
I so wish you could get away for a break margherita with your friends would be so empowering for you & if anyone deserves it you certainly do my friend. Is there no way it’s possible. Axx
Sounds like you had a great time @imsoblue just what the doctor ordered. Ax
Hi @Rosebush hope all is well for granddaughter & she gets home Tuesday . Sounds like you had a great weekend & cakes as an added bonus even better. Hope things stay quiet for you as we well know dementia is so unpredictable. Thankyou at least she is at peace now. You take care too Rosebush. Speak soon.Axxx
Hi @imsoblue so glad you had a great time sounds amazing. I agree with you us carers need to think about ourselves aswell & take breaks. I’ve just booked 4 nights away with friend family will see to OH. Axx
Your trip sounds like mine was.Barcelona will be a great getaway for you. @margherita even if you go to Milan for one night it might help. However, fair warning....you do have to come back and it's still the same. I left some things hanging (phone calls to get TV service for OH, funding reinstated, blah, blah blah) so in addition to going back to work, I go back to OH duties. While I was gone The Other One (his older daughter) and her OH visited him and bought him a new mattress. They had bought the first mattress for Assisted Living (his money of course) two months ago. Apparently it was too soft and he couldn't get out of it in the morning. A two month old mattress is now being replaced. I suspect it's more OH's physical decline rather than a mattress, but I am not there to witness it. Whoever delivered the new mattress hauled off the "old" one. What a waste.
Thank you ladies for keeping me sane throughout this ordeal!
Hi @Beads ,
so glad you will be spending some days in Barcelona in September.
I adore Barcelona. I have been there four times, there's so much to do and to see.
Here it is hot and sunny, Autumn seems to be far away. I do not like these long summer days, too long, too hot, too sad.
What did the doctor say about your OH's bloods?
Take care, dear friend
xxx M.
so glad you will be spending some days in Barcelona in September.
I adore Barcelona. I have been there four times, there's so much to do and to see.
Here it is hot and sunny, Autumn seems to be far away. I do not like these long summer days, too long, too hot, too sad.
What did the doctor say about your OH's bloods?
Take care, dear friend
xxx M.
[QUOTE ] While I was gone The Other One (his older daughter) and her OH visited him and bought him a new mattress. They had bought the first mattress for Assisted Living (his money of course) [/QUOTE]
Of course
Of course
Thankyou @margherita I am looking forward to it I haven’t been before. The Dr has stopped his water tablet to see if it makes a difference as the Kidney reading was borderline. He has to have bloods taken again in 2 weeks but if his legs begin to swell again then it’s back to the drawing board .After the Drs the 3 of us called off for a pub lunch .(granddaughter was with us). We all enjoyed it then when we got home OH started again kicking off it’s like whatever I say is wrong & he is just ready for an argument. It does my head in so of course he does the usual cause mayhem & then takes off too his bedroom. I just give up talk about fighting a loosing battle. My best bet is keeping my mouth shut then he has no reason to argue. I so wish you could get away my friend as I said you so deserve a break. Take good care speak soon Axxrx
Hi @Rosebush how are you hope all is quiet still. So glad your granddaughter is home . Speak soon take care. AxxHi beads , Granddaughter is back home now
From what I read @Beads and @margherita y'all will be like Monks...never to speak another word. If you two ever meet up together there will be so much talking going on because you have been totally mum (not your mother) for so long! Picture it for a good laugh! I know I did!
My lesson is to not only keep quiet, but to also say yes to everything OH says. If he says "bring me some laundry detergent so I can do my own wash in assisted living (nevermind that I can't walk or stand on my own)" I should just say yes, dear. I suspect his daughters will supply it and then the staff will have to handle this unbalanced (in more ways than one) large man trying to do laundry.
Hi @Beads and @imsoblue and all of you who, like me, besides fighting to survive our husbands' dementia, are also trying to survive their grumpiness.
I have become dumb, but it is not enough.
Yesterday OH did not speak to me the whole day. It all started when he was looking for his keys, which he could not find, as usual, also because he always leaves them in a different place.
I usually help him to search the house and the garden also if he doesn't ask me, but yesterday I was busy cleaning the kitchen and pretended not to notice what he was doing.
After few minutes he started shouting he was tired and fed up ( with me, I suppose).
Terrible mistake. I said in a quiet voice " me, too".
He got offended , uttered some unpleasant words and did not speak to me the whole day..
I have become dumb, but it is not enough.
Yesterday OH did not speak to me the whole day. It all started when he was looking for his keys, which he could not find, as usual, also because he always leaves them in a different place.
I usually help him to search the house and the garden also if he doesn't ask me, but yesterday I was busy cleaning the kitchen and pretended not to notice what he was doing.
After few minutes he started shouting he was tired and fed up ( with me, I suppose).
Terrible mistake. I said in a quiet voice " me, too".
He got offended , uttered some unpleasant words and did not speak to me the whole day..
Oops, you spoke 2 words! Since I've returned from my trip, it's been stressful. I feel my heart racing and even my lips are shaking. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells...and he lives in a CH!
Hi Beads hope you are well, yes still quiet here. Granddaughter is doing well now she is back home, she is eating again and my son was taking her and my grandson to the cinema this afternoon. My daughter is going to see her this evening so I have sent her some goodies, just wish I could see her aswell.. Take care Lx
The last part could have been written by me! I am having more similar investigations, no privacy either although last time I did manage to give a list. I wish there was a pill for more transport! Now that would help, a holiday pill too perhaps. Still On the Town is on the Proms on Saturday, perhaps I will hear you all singing along.
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Hi @MIA56 sorry to hear about your friend passing. It is sad that J can’t hold a conversation now with his brother I suppose some days are worse than others for him. I’m glad to hear you went to Drs you really need to look after yourself. We tend to the PWD needs that much , when we don’t feel 100% we just brush it aside & carry on. Hope you soon get sorted & feel back to normal . It is awkward isn’t it as you say it would be nice to be able to talk to Dr on your own. Here OH has just returned to his grumpy self since returning from France & told me in no uncertain terms he doesn’t want to talk or even bother with me. So that’s how it’s been . I’m keeping quiet because he is just ready for an argument at the drop of a hat. I agree what a life. You take good care of yourself my friend & keep posting. Axxx
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Hi @Rosebush I’m ok thanx how’s yourself. So pleased your granddaughter is on the mend .Us Granmas are brilliant with the goodies we know how to cheer them up . I know it’s sad you can’t get to see her is there no way someone can sit with your OH for a few hours . Or do they live a few hours away & you would need to stop over. Axx
Hi everyone,
Today I tried to explain to OH how frustrating my life is.
I should have known he wouldn't understand.
He thinks I should be pleased with caring for him, because , according to him, when someone loves their partner, caring is a pleasure.
I bit my tongue and left the room..
What else could I have done?
He has never loved or cared for anyone but himself
Today I tried to explain to OH how frustrating my life is.
I should have known he wouldn't understand.
He thinks I should be pleased with caring for him, because , according to him, when someone loves their partner, caring is a pleasure.
I bit my tongue and left the room..
What else could I have done?
He has never loved or cared for anyone but himself
