Things are going from bad to worse

[susanandliam]

Little Mum's mobility as in my previous post has now more or less completely gone, as well as Alzheimers she has been diagnosed in the last two weeks triple negative breast cancer in both breasts. She's still talking but its getting harder and harder to understand her and she has now lost her appetite to eat anything much.

I said to the care home Mum seemed to have got smaller but they said she's only lost half a stone in the last year. Having asked four times for her to be weighed recently finally she was only to find that she has lost
12 llbs in the last month and is now down to 6 stone 9llbs!

I noticed when Mum was with us on Saturday she ate a biscuit but seemed to be chewing it for ever without swallowing maybe this is why she's not eating?

Is it the cancer or the Alzheimers that's stopping her eating or has she just given up?

Don't know what to do for the best, I'm still working full time but want to spend more time with Mum. If I felt this is the end I'd just spend time with her. But I keep being told she's no where near that stage yet

I feel like I'm on some dreadful roller coaster of emotion. I feel worn out and depressed, struggling to keep it together at work. My poor Mum how much longer is this going to go on for.

Meeting the dr tomorrow could do with some advice.

 

[Islay]

Hi there, it’s the worrying about someone 24/7 that’s just so exhausting, but wanting to make every minute count. xx

I had a dietician/nutritionalist assessment for my mam (via the GP) and she is now on 4 prescribed ‘fresubin’ drinks a day. They are slightly thickened (stage 1 they are called), and they, plus 2 Cadbury’s chocolate pots (I’m sure other brands are available), are all she lives on. I didn’t think it possible, as she is completely imobile, but she’s maintaining a baseline weight with these, which are nutritionally and calorie balanced. Her swallow is ok with thickened fluid, but it means I can hoist her into her electronic chair, and take her round the park for a walk.

Before we had the dietician assessment I was making up complan (which you can get in supermarkets, to keep weight on her).
Not sure what stage the cancer is at with your Mum, so can’t comment on that, but hope GP appointment goes well tomorrow x

 

[Hazara8]

Little Mum's mobility as in my previous post has now more or less completely gone, as well as Alzheimers she has been diagnosed in the last two weeks triple negative breast cancer in both breasts. She's still talking but its getting harder and harder to understand her and she has now lost her appetite to eat anything much.

I said to the care home Mum seemed to have got smaller but they said she's only lost half a stone in the last year. Having asked four times for her to be weighed recently finally she was only to find that she has lost
12 llbs in the last month and is now down to 6 stone 9llbs!

I noticed when Mum was with us on Saturday she ate a biscuit but seemed to be chewing it for ever without swallowing maybe this is why she's not eating?

Is it the cancer or the Alzheimers that's stopping her eating or has she just given up?

Don't know what to do for the best, I'm still working full time but want to spend more time with Mum. If I felt this is the end I'd just spend time with her. But I keep being told she's no where near that stage yet

I feel like I'm on some dreadful roller coaster of emotion. I feel worn out and depressed, struggling to keep it together at work. My poor Mum how much longer is this going to go on for.

Meeting the dr tomorrow could do with some advice.

The Alzheimer's can affect appetite and swallowing, dependant on the 'stage' it is at. Also medications play their part. Talk with the GP and raise all your concerns, then come back to TP. Take each day at a time ..... because you cannot do anything else?

 

[susanandliam]

The Alzheimer's can affect appetite and swallowing, dependant on the 'stage' it is at. Also medications play their part. Talk with the GP and raise all your concerns, then come back to TP. Take each day at a time ..... because you cannot do anything else?

Thank you x

 

[susanandliam]

Hi there, it’s the worrying about someone 24/7 that’s just so exhausting, but wanting to make every minute count. xx

I had a dietician/nutritionalist assessment for my mam (via the GP) and she is now on 4 prescribed ‘fresubin’ drinks a day. They are slightly thickened (stage 1 they are called), and they, plus 2 Cadbury’s chocolate pots (I’m sure other brands are available), are all she lives on. I didn’t think it possible, as she is completely imobile, but she’s maintaining a baseline weight with these, which are nutritionally and calorie balanced. Her swallow is ok with thickened fluid, but it means I can hoist her into her electronic chair, and take her round the park for a walk.

Before we had the dietician assessment I was making up complan (which you can get in supermarkets, to keep weight on her).
Not sure what stage the cancer is at with your Mum, so can’t comment on that, but hope GP appointment goes well tomorrow x

Thank you as you say it's the worrying that's exhausting, thanks for the information its useful to know x

 

[susanandliam]

Seen the doctor and basically little Mum has weeks or months left depending on how she declines from now on. The doctor thought it pointless to weigh Mum regularly as it won't mean anything and there's no point in putting Mum through the process of being weighed and me worrying about her loss of weight.

They will try giving her milkshakes etc. but if she refuses then there's not anything much that can be done other than make her comfortable.

The cancer may have spread to her bones but they can't tell. So not the easiest of days but she's 90 years old and had a good life, all I can do is make sure that she is kept as comfortable as possible and that she doesn't have to endure all of this for much longer

 

[Hazara8]

Seen the doctor and basically little Mum has weeks or months left depending on how she declines from now on. The doctor thought it pointless to weigh Mum regularly as it won't mean anything and there's no point in putting Mum through the process of being weighed and me worrying about her loss of weight.

They will try giving her milkshakes etc. but if she refuses then there's not anything much that can be done other than make her comfortable.

The cancer may have spread to her bones but they can't tell. So not the easiest of days but she's 90 years old and had a good life, all I can do is make sure that she is kept as comfortable as possible and that she doesn't have to endure all of this for much longer

That is right. 'comfort' is the watchword and as peaceful an environment as is possible. This is often the period when we as carers (daughter, son, husband, wife, partner et al) require that extra reserve of energy and a special kind of strength.
And the love which binds you, that will do the rest.

 

[susanandliam]

❤️Xxx

 

[Amy in the US]

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum.

Is there hospice, or some sort of palliative/comfort care, on board for your mum?

You must be so tired ans distressed by all of this and I am sorry. Please don't hesitate to keep posting here if it helps. TP is always open.